Home Forums Welcome Hello! Decluttering… Facebook!

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This topic contains 27 replies, has 15 voices, and was last updated by  Abigail Clark 3 months ago.

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  • #159339

    I know I have mentioned this on here in the past, but I wanted to bring it up again as I had restarted a Facebook acount about a year and half ago and just yesterday I deleted it again.

    Have any of you deleted social networking sites? How did you feel after?

    It sounds crazy, but I did it because it was just one more way I could be hassled. People started arguments with me on Facebook and I asked myself why I bothered with something that was just another “thing to keep up with” at the end of the day. A lot of the people I liked speaking with stopped using the site. They were still members, but never posted anything or responded to messages. So I thought, what is the point in keeping it? It feels good to delete it – like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. And if friends that I spoke to on FB don’t communicate with me any other way, then were they really friends in the first place?

  • #187582

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Anita- It sounds like Facebook is a useful tool for you. When all of your friends/groups use it, it makes perfect sense to keep it! I have never heard of Google+ – what is it? I am curious!

    For me, Facebook started becoming ComplainBook, a place for everyone to rant and rave about trivial things and people started getting fired up and angry at each other, picking fights. Those who I actually enjoyed speaking with just kind of dropped off of the Facebook radar (maybe they were tired of the ranting and raving as well). I wish more of good my friends used it more often. I probably wouldn’t have deleted it then!

  • #187583

    Ella
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I have only music research associates on my list of Facebook friends. Their posts are delightful and relevant to my research… except for one guy. He cluttered up my Facebook page with several posts every day about everything that his kids are doing. Yet he is a valuable associate, so I have blocked his posts from showing on my page but still kept him on my friends list.

    I also had another non-research friend who posted frivolously every day. She’s a very sweet woman, but her endless posts were driving me crazy so I told her I was limiting my Facebook friends to only music researchers. She was hurt, and I felt bad.
    I should have just discreetly blocked her messages without saying a word about it.

  • #187586

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Ella – I would have done the same thing that you did. I had started deleting people off Facebook when they were flooding my newsfeed or when they just weren’t someone I’d consider a friend any longer. I think I hurt some people, and I didn’t mean to. But I wanted to use the site the way that worked best for me. I no longer have to worry about that anymore! It’s a relief!

  • #187587

    Mimi
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    i am thinking of deleting my profile. in terms of decluttering: do i need fb? no. do i love fb? no. does it make me smile? sometimes, most times it produces an evil grin because of the triviality of status updates.
    in this spirit: “off”

  • #187588

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I have a fairly large group of “friends” — about 650, I think. I skim through it fairly quickly each day and probably don’t spend more than 15 minutes on it — maybe a bit more if there are interesting articles that people link to.

    For me it serves a variety of purposes: linking up with old friends (I’ve moved a lot); keeping up with cousins (I moved from Philadelphia to go to college when I was 18, so I’ve lost touch a bit); some professional links, some activist links, some local links (especially to events) . . . it’s overall useful to me.

    There are a few people I need to block, though, — as has been mentioned, I have a few people I know who post DOZENS of times a day with nonsense. I just scroll through it without reading, but it would be better to be rid of them.

  • #187595

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Mimi – Just keep in mind that if you decide to delete it, you need a special link to do so. Facebook just tells you how to “deactivate” your profile (which keeps everything in a hidden status, so if you change your mind, you can just reactivate it with all of your old information, friends, photos, etc. If you choose to officially delete it use the following link:

    http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=16929680703

    @susanintexas – I wish I had the self-control to just check the site for a few minutes a day. That was probably part of my problem!

  • #187596

    Nithy
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I have a lot of people asking me if I’m on facebook. My reply is that I refuse to facebook. I explain that there are a lot of people that I simply never want to see or hear from ever again, and joining facebook would make it too easy for them to find me.

  • #187597

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Nithy – I agree with you. It is WAY too easy for people to find you on Facebook. There were times when I wouldn’t leave comments on friend’s pages because I saw the names of those who commented before me and I knew they would friend request me if they saw my name.

  • #187601

    Nithy
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I’ve been told that I should just crank up the privacy settings to maximum, but I’ve heard too many things about facebook and privacy, especially the fact that your privacy settings can be reset without your knowledge if they update things.

  • #187604

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Anita, thank you for the info! I appreciate it! :o)

    @Nithy – You’re right about the privacy settings being reset. It happened a bunch of times!

  • #187606

    Ella
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    On Facebook, if you hover your cursor over the right margin of an unwanted post, you will be able to click a blue X, and then choose from the drop-down menu either to hide that one post or to hide all posts from that person without having to delete him or her from your friends list.

  • #187607

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I’ve wanted to declutter facebook many times before, but never have. I always end up deciding to just cut out the parts (i.e., the people 🙂 ) that I don’t like. Actually, it’s not so much that I don’t like them, it’s more that they just aren’t in my life.

    One of the things I like least about it is that it seems like everyone from my HS is friends with everyone else. Cute, but most of those people I wasn’t close with to begin with, and I found that I didn’t like the feeling that I was somehow still in HS. So I’ve started unfriending people who a) aren’t in my life, and b) were never really in my life that much. I’d like to get to about 100 friends (I think I’m at around 125), which I think will represent the people who are most important to me.

    I hide posts from too-frequent/annoying posters. There are a few people though who post the funniest stuff ever, and those alone make facebook worthwhile. Here’s a post from my best friend, “I had to tell my daughter to roll the window down to flip some stupid driver off today. What is with people? It rains in WA!”. Priceless.

  • #187618

    KeKeD
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    Tried but disliked Twitter so I closed my account.

    I do have a Facebook account that is only open to my family members. I don’t post often but will check to see what is going on with everyone else as we don’t phone much. I also “like” a few groups depending on current interests but will add and purge as the mood strikes.

    I joined SparkPeople to lose weight and have had good success. But now that I am close to my goal weight, I’m not so motivated by the exercise/diet aspects and have been debating continuing my account. Right now I tend to use it more to keep in touch with the “friends” I’ve made.

  • #187625

    bandicoot
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    o i had facebook and twitter and was starting to be online all day and night long….so 2.5 years ago, i simply went cold turkey and closed down both accounts.
    now, i can hear myself think and i feel a lot calmer.
    they were mental clutter of the absolute worst kind….for me.

    i have had no urge to restart facebook, despite all kinds of encouragement, and blandishments.
    tough.
    i won’t die if i miss something, after all!

    google+ is a different kettle of fish though….i am watching and waiting.

  • #187627

    Mimi
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @themusiclivez: thank you for the link, i was looking for it! i deactivated my account 2 or 3 times and the problem is: if you “forget” about deactivating fb and log in again, it´s like before, everything is there, as if you didn´t do anthing. hmpf.

    my “problem” is that i really USE facebook as a kind of bookmark-collection. i post links to my wall (just for me) and so i am able to store links like booksmarks and have access from everywhere, no matter what computer, browser or whatever i use. does anybody know a similar solution without facebook?

  • #187633

    morfydd
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    Mimi, for that purpose I’d use Evernote. I’m trying to consolidate all my bits and pieces of data there, and it works really well for that.

  • #187634

    Jackthetiger
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    Many family and friends live interstate and overseas, and FB gives me a chance to keep up with their lives and see their photos. I find it a quick and simple method of communication. I have very strict privacy controls and I set it up with a false name. Only my real friends and family can recognise me, so I only have about 70 contacts. I do not use any other site and I only check it when I check Unclutterer!

  • #187637

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Mimi – You’re welcome! FB doesn’t want people to know about that link. It’s silly, really.

    @Jackthetiger – I am debating creating an account with a false name once this one officially cancels in the next two weeks. I did a lot of thinking last night and I really enjoy speaking with about 25 people or so. I just hate the “Facebook politics” and feeling that I need to accept people who I met once or twice. If I create a fake name I will get to choose who I add.

    Now the question is… What name would I choose? LoL

  • #187656

    chacha1
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I have been a desultory Facebook user for a couple of years, but there are numerous people in the dance community who really use it for networking and publicity, so I recently amped up with a ton of requests to friends-of-my-friends, and consequently have some fairly big names on my list.

    FB is a really silly way to communicate, IMO, but if it’s the best way to ease my way into acquaintanceship with people I would like to work with down the line, I will do what works for them. I am also a member of LinkedIn.

    Ultimately, social media will not help me forge a *close* connection with anyone at all – but if it helps someone in an adjacent professional orbit to recognize my name, and perhaps know a little about me (simply because of the “friends” we have in common), that can only help me if/when I approach them with some proposal.

    I use near-maximum privacy settings, including turning off all apps. And I changed my password recently. I have never had to “de-friend” or hide anybody, but I did tell one person flat-out to stop contacting me.

  • #187659

    pkilmain
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I’m a couple times a day checker of FB. I am very selective about who I friend, but it’s invaluable to me to keep in contact with my younger family members, esp if I want to see photos of their kids. 🙂 Also, two other internet groups I belong to migrated to FB (with the private group option). These are people I know in real life, but who live around the country, and we write back and forth several times a week.

    I’m very intereted in Google+ ……

    Oh and though I downloaded Evernote on my iPad some time ago, I finally set up my account, and downloaded it on my desktop and iTouch. I have great hopes for it.

  • #187662

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I decided to try using a different name and created a new Facebook earlier today. I still feel free because now I know the only people who are going to be friends with me on it are people I choose. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this earlier. Thank you, Jackthetiger for putting that idea in my head!

    I have friends all over the U.S. and I want to stay in touch!

    I want to thank everyone for contributing to this conversation. It helped me to make up my mind!

  • #187684

    Jackthetiger
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    themusiclivez @ You are welcome. I don’t know why we feel so compelled to tell the truth to organisations like FB. I notice you did not tell us your secret name. Do you not want everyone on Unclutterer to befriend you??!! 🙂

    I originally chose a false name because I am a teacher and I did not want students to befriend me. I think it would be a breach of my privacy and theirs. When students ask if I am on FB, I tell them that I am, but I only use it for close friends and family. I have thought of setting up an account for students so I can help them with homework. At the moment, they can email me one by one, but FB would allow a conversation. However, I do not want to know everything they are doing and saying in their private lives. That would be a can of worms far too complicated for my liking.

    PS: I would be very careful of Google products too. Read the fine print carefully. At work, we are no longer allowed to respond to parents and students with gmail accounts. I am not sure why exactly, but it is something to do with sharing of email accounts.

  • #187685

    pkilmain
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    Ah yes, I have a young acquaintence from dancing who has sent me a friend request. I’m not going to befriend her for exactly the reason Jack mentions: I have no desire to know what goes on in her life. Seeing her 1-2 times a week is plenty as she’s quite the talker…..

  • #187692

    Jude2004
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I unfriended my best friend on Facebook because when we were friends, I constantly received friend requests. My 7 friends are first cousins, an ex-sister-in-law, and my daughter. If you use it judiciously, it’s fine. Also, you can delete people’s posts from your feed so if they are annoying but you love them anyway (e.g., two of my cousins), you don’t have to see all that baloney.

  • #187742

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    @Jackthetiger – Thank you for the warning about Google. I probably won’t end up looking into the Google+ program now because I have my secret FB and one social networking site is enough! I loved your comment about my secret FB name, by the way!

    My brother-in-law is also a teacher and has his privacy settings on FB set super high so that students can’t find him!

  • #187802

    lottielot
    Member

    Decluttering… Facebook!

    I feel uncomfortable at the control people hand over to FB, not to mention the addiction factor. I joined FB a while back as I have a good friend who has problems (alcoholism) and she won’t reply to emails, refuses to give me her phone number etc. She uses FB a lot though, so I found it the only way to contact her and keep tabs on her. I care about her and can see from her posts whether she is up or down, I keep hoping she quits drinking before something awful happens. Then I get people like my mum sending me friend requests! Ridiculous, I have zero interest in chatting to my mum on FB! Ditto the old school friends not seen for 20 years. My close friends I either text or email, sometimes I ring them. I can’t keep up with lots of people, I have limited emotional energy and prefer to stay in close touch with intimate friends, with the occasional ‘hi, how are you?’ email to and from less intimate friends. I hear the mums at school gossiping about FB stuff and it’s like hanging out with 16 year olds, not 36 year olds 🙁 I ignore friend requests from the various bizarre people from the past who I wouldn’t cross the street to talk to.
    For teachers using social networking for homework discussions etc, does your school not have something? My older son has a VLE where teachers post homework, discussion of learning related stuff etc. I did my degree by distance learning, and found the online forums fantastic for learning via discussion with people I never met. A few have become friends and we email a few times a year for updates. We also had online study groups where we used yahoo groups, I’ve found yahoo groups work well for small groups with a purpose.

  • #315166

    Abigail Clark
    Participant

    If you want to declutter your facebook newsfeed, do check this guide, How to
    Declutter Your Facebook Newsfeed

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