Unitasker Wednesday: PottyCovers

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

I have been in some disgusting public bathrooms in my lifetime. I’ve seen things I can’t unsee. I’ve smelled things I can’t unsmell. But, I’ll spare you any further details because, you know, this is a family-friendly website after all. Just believe me when I say there are some truly horrific bathrooms out in our world.

Even though I’ve been to the worst of the worst, there is still no way I would buy an enormous disposable blanket to drape over a toilet to “protect” me from germs, such as the PottyCover:

For starters, these toilet covers are a dollar a piece, which seems like a lot for something you’re going to throw away after a single use. Seeing as how large they are, though, I guess you’re getting your money’s worth for the materials?

Secondly, putting these covers on a toilet (and removing them afterward) requires extensive use of one’s hands. And, as we all know from basic biology, your hands are significantly more likely to spread and contract germs than your tushy is. Since you’re probably not going to wash your hands after installing this gigantic potty cover, you’re going to touch this cover and some toilet paper with germ-infested hands. Whereas, if you didn’t put this cover on the toilet, your hands would be more clean than if you had. (Not a lot more clean, but a little. Keep reading.)

Finally, study after study has been conducted showing that the average toilet paper dispenser has significantly more germs on it than the toilet seat. In fact, toilet seats are often the least bacteria-infested locations in a public restroom. As long as no one wiped the toilet seat down with dollar bills (one of the most bacteria-infested items you usually touch in a normal day), you’re statistically fine just sitting straight on the seat. A toilet seat is relatively germ free. I trust the MythBusters on this. (And for those of you who are squeamish about germs, know that your computer keyboard has far more bacterial colonies on it than a toilet seat. You’re welcome.)

As far as these ridiculously sized PottyCovers are concerned, it’s best to save your money and just wash your hands.

8 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: PottyCovers”

  1. posted by shris on

    One time I wish I had something just that huge is when I have to use a porta potty at a large event. Those things are disgusting, especially at events where alcohol is served.

    Yeah, it’s a unitasker, but I would pay for something like that in that situation. For sure.

  2. posted by Erin Doland on

    @shris — I don’t think it would work on most porta potties since the cover is attached at the sides and regular porta potties have that bench/table toilet seat thing. Besides, who wants to get up close and personal with a porta potty to put this thing on even if it would work!

  3. posted by Steve on

    Don’t public bathrooms already have toilet seat covers? Why do you need to bring your own?

  4. posted by Michelle on

    Steve, You can’t expect us to use PUBLIC toilet seat covers! EWW. Sarcasm.

  5. posted by nana on

    How big is this thing…how do you carry it in the average purse or pocket…and how do you dispose of it afterwards…ugghhh all around.

  6. posted by Vicki on

    Somehow I am thinking that trust must be involved in using the toilet any where. Really. I just trust that the germs which inhabit the world are just doing their thing and not really out to get me. So, as far as I am concerned, this unitasker is my favorite – in the useless category.

  7. posted by Laura on

    I will admit to buying a smaller version of these when I had a newly potty trained toddler and we had to use public restrooms. it draped over the toilet so she could hold herself over it without gripping the actual toilet seat and also protected her pants from dragging against the front of the toilet. I know the germs haven’t killed any of us yet, but so many women do the *squat and sprinkle all over the seat* now that I hate public restrooms.

  8. posted by Christine on

    I also have bought the smaller version of these for my potty-training kids for road trips, but never ended up using them, so I would not use this either. However, I WOULD wash my hands if I were to use this because I always wash my hands after using the bathroom. As you mentioned, toilet seats are not the worst things to touch, so at minimum, I am touching SOME part of the door to get out.

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