Unitasker Wednesday: Pic Nic Pants

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

It’s difficult to believe, but it appears we have run out of coffee unitaskers to feature. Instead of giving up and throwing in the towel, reader Elaine found us a brilliant “multi-tasking” unitasker from Italy to feature instead.

The purpose of this week’s selection is obviously to be a multi-tasking garment, but I’m not really sure the Pic Nic Pant is up for the challenge:

The purpose of the Pic Nic Pant, as described on the designer’s site, is:

… [to] take advantage of the usual cross-legged position to become a comfortable surface useful for consumption of a meal outdoors. Laterally pants have an orientable pocket for drinks.

I’ll be honest, the drink holder on the right knee has the potential to be useful. However, since it’s not detachable, it’s awkward just hanging down when you’re up walking around. The tray insert between the legs, though, is wrong on many levels. My biggest issue with it is that the tray prevents crumbs from falling directly to the ground. Not having to clean your clothes or the floor when you’re finished eating is why eating outside is so awesome. You dropped a bit of your hot dog bun onto the grass? No problem. A bird will come along and eat that bun piece for dinner — simplicity to the extreme!

Thanks again to reader Elaine for finding this week’s unitasker for us.

37 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: Pic Nic Pants”

  1. posted by Sarah on

    I just… I can’t. What? What IS that nonsense?

  2. posted by Mackenzie on

    Meanwhile I was just thinking “wear a skirt”. Women have been using skirts and the bottoms of their aprons as surfaces/baskets/etc for centuries if not millenia.

  3. posted by Liz E. on

    Imagine the family picture at the family reunion picnic–everyone with their Pic Nic Pants that look like something out of Aladdin. Classic.

  4. posted by Erin Doland on

    @Liz E. — Now I want a family reunion photo JUST LIKE THAT!! 🙂

  5. posted by Dede on

    Ah, the return of the Hammer Pants. This is wrong on SO many levels.

  6. posted by blueberry on

    I have several similar items that are indeed very convenient to use as a picnic table. They are called skirts (and look a lot more elegant :-))

  7. posted by Kandice on

    I have no words. Ridiculous.

  8. posted by WilliamB on

    I think we have a winner for Most Ridiculous Unitasker of the Year! Congratuations, Elaine.

  9. posted by Karyn on

    Am I the only one who thinks this looks like some bizarre 21st century codpiece writ large? o.O

    Wrong on so many levels, indeed.

  10. posted by Karyn on

    Also: Why doesn’t the “table” fabric match the color of the pants? I can’t imagine walking around wearing these, and believe me, I’m no fashionista.

  11. posted by paisley on

    That is insanely ridiculous! But I did get my laugh for the day…

  12. posted by ET on

    I’m with Sarah and Kandice. I just can’t…I…there are no words!

  13. posted by Carol Swedlund on

    Agreed … there really are no words! but since my knee injury and subsequent surgery last year, I won’t ever be sitting on the ground like that again, so I certainly don’t need this!

  14. posted by DN on

    Hahahahah–IT’S HAMMERTIME! : ). Definitely wins my prize for the most ridiculous unitasker to date!

  15. posted by JustGail on

    Ummmmm……….no. Just – no.

    Orientable drink pocket? so, if you don’t adjust it as you stand up, you can dump your drink all over your shoes?

  16. posted by JustGail on

    These make the poo-catchers they put on carriage horses look positively elegant by comparison.

  17. posted by Nana on

    I thought at first it might be a suitable garment for an adult who has to wear diapers…but I see it only sags {“drapes”) across the front.

    No, no, a thousand times no.

  18. posted by handstand on

    Why did they not make these in red checkered, like picnic tablecloths? How about just putting a napkin in your lap?

  19. posted by Jane on

    Aaaah!! My eyes, my eyes! Definitely all colours of wrong!

  20. posted by Jen on

    Am I the only one who actually can’t sit cross-legged (or cris-cross-applesauce, as my son says) for any length of time? It makes my legs and/or feet fall asleep. So in addition to being a complete abomination, these are a no-tasker for me.

  21. posted by Michele on

    My first thought…Saturday Night Live skit waiting to happen…

  22. posted by pan on

    haaaaa. I would like to know how much they cost? This is so FUNNY!

  23. posted by Another Deb on

    These look like reverse jodhpurs.

  24. posted by Heather on

    I laughed out loud when I saw these.. the picture of the person walking with them on just looks all kinds of wrong. At least if the “table” material and pants were the same colour, they would at least approach a semi-fashionable look..

  25. posted by Maya on

    My ears are ringing now because I laughed so hard at the pictures/concept (and comments, awesome comments!)

  26. posted by Matt on

    I’m going to use mine with the matching tie/napkin.

  27. posted by Michele on

    Is there a Unitasker of the Year Award?? I think this could take the cake…pun intended!

  28. posted by Don on

    Am I the only one who thinks this looks like some bizarre 21st century codpiece writ large?

    That’s next week when Erin will be running the unitasker donut holder pants.

  29. posted by Jeff @ Digital Nomad Journey on

    Eh, these remind me of the old school MC Hammer pants. Not really a fan anymore!

  30. posted by Kerrie on

    You know, I am disappointed in the Unitasker this week. I come on here every week just to read the indignant posting of someone out there who wants to vigorously defend the Unitasker and tackle Erin for how inappropriate/thoughtless she has been.

    And then this week, nothing! No-one can say anything good about it!

    It is awful, isn’t it? Why would you do this to yourself?

  31. posted by N'Lo on

    This is upsetting on just so many levels. But then again, a Utilikilt would work equally well! I am told an entire 6 pack can be accommodated in their copious pockets. Noting that nice girls and boys take care to arrange their kilts when they sit akimbo!

  32. posted by Rebecca on

    Posted by Dede – 04/25/2012

    “Ah, the return of the Hammer Pants. This is wrong on SO many levels.”

    The MC-Hammer-and-cheese-on-ryle pants.

    These are crazy-town.

  33. posted by Rebecca on


  34. posted by Kaz on

    Proof that not all Italian clothing is classy. 🙂

    For the complete unitasker ensemble: a picnic in the family room with a smores machine, spraycan pancakes, soda on tap, and huge ice balls. With everyone wearing these pants, and Dad wearing the Daddle too.

  35. posted by Anica on

    I have to refute the author. My biggest issue is that it reminds me of something I thought was a good idea when I was 7 but looks stupid.

  36. posted by Anita on

    Minus the drink holder and the 2-toned fabric, how is this different from the harem pants that have been a trend for over a year now?

  37. posted by Gillian on

    It might do in the Malaysian market where cleanliness is the law, or so I’ve heard.

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