Unitasker Wednesday: Cooler Dry

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

Turning a cooler upside down to dry after washing it is so 2008. This is 2009, and you need Cooler Dry:

Sure, you could just flip the cooler’s top open if turning it upside down isn’t your style, but if you did that then you wouldn’t get to buy this unitasker!

Thanks to reader Longstride for introducing us to the Cooler Dry! I got a hearty laugh out of this product, which was a great birthday present.

32 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: Cooler Dry”

  1. posted by Gayle on

    Erin, I **LOVE** Unitasker Wednesdays!!! And HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

    As for the Cooler Dry… OMG, you have got to be kidding me. Someone actually wasted a great deal of time, energy and money bringing this Billy Mays reject to market.

    Just flip the darn cooler upside down! Or, I can think of at least a dozen things you can use to prop the lid open with. OR you could use a towel to actually wipe out the inside! Egads, that would be hard work!

    This one really is a ROFLMAO unitasker!!!

  2. posted by Anita on

    I can’t help but feel that this piece of plastic was meant for some other project, and then for whatever reason got repurposed as…. this. Guess I’m just having trouble (a lot of trouble!) imagining that anyone would seriously think up something like this.

    Also: I think the blue ends really make a difference; don’t you? 🙂

  3. posted by anna b. on

    It’s one size fits all! But it’s shipping weight is 3 lbs., which seems a bit of a puzzler…

  4. posted by SandyO on

    Yeah, this one is stupid. Why not just leave the lid open to dry it out?

  5. posted by Dawn F on

    I bet China loves Americans – we come up with all of this insane plastic stuff and then said plastic stuff gets made in a Chinese factory! LOL!

    Dry it out with a towel or sit it on the back porch wide open in the happy sunshine and WOW you have a dry cooler! Or if you just have to put it back on the garage shelf immediatley couldn’t you just stick a small piece of wood at the opening to keep it propped open?

    This has got to be the most ridiculous Unitasker – good one! You might get some votes for the electric shock game thing or that Spin-The-Bottle game that you have posted previously, but THIS ONE is major ridiculous!

  6. posted by Abby on

    I personally only use dry ice in my cooler to avoid have to use the cooler dry! Just kidding. This is a great one, Erin. Happy birthday!

  7. posted by Splint Chesthair on

    Jeepers, they couldn’t even put a bottle opener on one end?

  8. posted by Don on

    Wow! This is the best unitasker ever!

  9. posted by Rue on

    I don’t understand why you can’t use something you already own to prop up the lid. This is one of the very few unitaskers I see absolutely no reason to buy or own! Nice work ;D

  10. posted by Christine Simiriglia on

    Entrepreneurship is alive and well in America… where else would stuff like this make money?

  11. posted by knitwych on

    Wow, I’ve been living in the Dark Ages! I just use a dishtowel folded into a snake to hold the cooler lid open a couple inches while it dries.

  12. posted by Peter (a different one) on

    This reminds me of the poor woman who invented a pair of plastic thingys to help hold the garbage can down while you lifted out the heavy bag. If I recall correctly she was trying to show the reporter the problem and the reporter responded by placing her feet on either side of the can and lifting out the bag.

    The woman probably still has 100,000 thingys in her dining room. So sad…

  13. posted by Sapphire on

    Happy Birthday Erin!

    I’m not sure this even qualifies as a unitasker…it’s more like a NO-tasker. I cannot in my wildest dreams imagine any actual need for this! As others have said, if you don’t want to just wipe it with a towel, leave it open in the sun or prop the lid up with one of at least 1000 common household objects that could be used for the purpose.

  14. posted by wch on

    Memo to the “let’s-get-more-page-hits department”: ask the readers to come up with some other task that renders the unitasker a multitasker; perhaps with a prize.

    Personally, I think the idea of a “turn a unitasker into a multitasker” contest is itself prize-worthy.

    I’ll start: could this cooler thing be attached to your shoulder to prop up a phone? How ’bout grabbin a hot burger off the grill? The possibilities are (apparently not) endless.

  15. posted by Karyn on

    I always dried the cooler with a clean dish towel, and left the lid off for a short while to make sure it’s completely dry. Completely useless for anyone with a cooler that has a detached lid (no hinge).

    But, wait: If you have at least a couple of young guys at the party just waiting to prove their awesome strength, this could easily multitask as a wishbone!

    …except then you’d have to buy another one for the next picnic.

  16. posted by Celeste on

    This should be the patron saint of unitaskers! Maybe there is some way to make a crest out of it.

  17. posted by Allison on

    I find that all the most ridiculous unitaskers are hanging at random on those little display hangers at grocery stores, mid-isle. The very fact that they couldn’t find anywhere to actually put these things in the store screams “something you don’t need!”

  18. posted by Caitlan on

    I think this is for storing your cooler open to keep it fresh, like refrigerators in vacation homes. I have never owned a cooler but I remember getting out my parent’s one and it would smell stale and have to be rinsed before we could use it. I am quite sure we didn’t put the cooler away wet, as it would seem dry but just stale.

  19. posted by RRR on

    Just an aside regarding last weeks unitasker (freezer thingy). I got home last Friday and my power had been out! Luckily it was only out long enough to unset the clock on the microwave, so the freezer temp thing wasn’t needed; but I sure did think about you guys.

  20. posted by Kalle on

    I admit that this device (if you can even call it that) is really, really hard to defend. I can’t think of a single situation, circumstance or special interest group that might need it enough to warrant the purchase. I mean, you could use literally ANYTHING in its place, and even that isn’t be necessary.

  21. posted by Jason Rehmus (longstride) on

    I found this in the big box store where I work and knew I had to submit it for Unitasker Wednesday. Every time I walk down that I aisle I shake my head in disbelief. Now I’ll grin knowing how much you all enjoyed it!

    It truly is the stupidest “product” I’ve ever seen. Huge waste.

  22. posted by Maura on

    NO WAY am I defending this — but I do like it’s use, after thoroughly drying, to keep the lid propped open at all times while not in use. A snaked up towel would do the same but be subject to getting icky (think spider webs and mice) if stored in the garage, and a log would have to be longer than the width of the cooler otherwise it could fall in if the cooler was jarred, no longer serving its intended purpose… not to mention it becomes dry and brittle as it ages which leaves you with a mess the following season.

    Again, I agree it’s a unitasker — but if I were to come across it in, say, a $ store or at Odd-Lots (when they don’t sell), I would be tempted. No risk of mice and wood chips, and it is more secure than the other suggestions.

    Shame on me — this coming from someone who is married to an engineer/ patent lawyer.

    What do you do when you are done using your automatic drip coffee pot for the day? I think most people don’t air the water-reservoir out afterward. (I learned this while using shared kitchen facilities at college, and on vacation.) And using a paper towel in not recommended by the manufacturer. I have a pair of wooden toaster tongs (yes I use these for toast too) that I prop in the cone-filter area after cleaning out the coffee grinds, etc. Moisture-free within a few hours — and isn’t an eye-sore (a spoon could do the same thing) as I often leave it there until coffee is made the following morning.

  23. posted by Brandon on

    Strikes me as wasteful. I just keep it open with a towel.

  24. posted by Sky on

    Seems any plastic do-dad would serve the same purpose.

  25. posted by Chess on

    Now THIS is a true Unitasker. Baffling that someone would purchase this item.

  26. posted by Another Deb on

    I call this a You-Know Tasker. You KNOW it is going into the next garage sale!

  27. posted by Jen on

    This is so not a unitasker! You could totally use this to do one of those acrobat-handing-from-a-chain-by-their-teeth death spirals!

    *blinks innocently*

  28. posted by Ellis on

    Oh, sure. I’ve emailed you about this twice, but give longstride the credit, lol. 😉

  29. posted by Rick on

    This just seems funny to me, the website is UNCLUTTERER.com, and it pushes useless products like this? Doesn’t this kind of stuff end up as clutter? Useless junk that you have lying around?

  30. posted by Ana on

    This looks like something right out of the Sky Mall catalog…

  31. posted by WilliamB on

    Awesome unitakster! Not a single defender and not even good at the assigned task.

  32. posted by Natasa on

    brr….This one is scary. The world has come to an end…

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