It’s the holiday season, and we all need a little smile. Similar to our Unitasker Wednesday posts, we don’t want you to buy these items. We simply want you to have fun reading about all the awful gifts of clutter you wouldn’t really want to give this year.
Stumped on what to buy your favorite co-worker or loved one? Consider giving the gift of clutter!
Small Kitchen Appliances
Your mother-in-law hates coffee? No matter. Buy her an espresso maker anyway. Get the deluxe version equipped with steamer and grinder. It’ll take up lots of counter space and you can use it when you visit. Heck, buy her two!
If you really want to yank the chain of the minimalist in your life, buy knick knack gifts. These small shelf stuffers fit any budget. You can get a $1 replica of the Statue of Liberty. Inexpensive gifts not your style? Consider the pricey gem-studded Hello Kitty figurine for $163,000.00. (image from boredbored.com)
Arcade-Style Video Games
Who needs Rock Band when you can go retro and deliver a full size, 300-pound Ms. Pac-man to an eager child or adult? Cram it into the living room of a tiny studio appartment for easy entertainment. A fun and educational experience on the history of video games can be had by all.
Who says you can’t impose your own artistic tastes onto others? Let’s face it, some people in your life need your artful guidance. At big box stores, garage sales, or art galleries, look for bizarre sculptures, abstract paintings, or anything that would leave the recipient asking: “What is it?”
A Pile of Boulders
For your suburbia-dwelling friends, don’t forget the garden. Call your local rock quarry and have a truck dump off a pile of rocks on your friend’s driveway. They’ll have hours of fun trying to pick up the boulders, one-by-one, and finding the perfect garden spot for each to occupy.
Hard-to-Use Electronic Equipment
For the technically challenged on your list, give the gift of complex electronics that will end up tucked away on a garage shelf. Universal remotes that require setup on a computer and web access are an option. Challenge the recipient to sit with the manual until he or she figures out how to program it.
In his post Too many flower vases, Matt asked: “So what can I do with all of these vases?” There is no need to get rid of them when you can let them collect dust in a cabinet! Add to your friends and family members’ collections with a giant vase to obstruct the entrance through any front door.
Really, the possibilities are endless when it comes to lovely clutter gifts. Large, small, expensive, cheap — clutter gifts span the world over and can easily provide a lifetime of dust, maintenance, and storage fees for your most treasured friends.
What is the most outrageous clutter gift you’ve ever received? Let us know about it in the comments.