Home Forums Living Spaces Sentimental Clutter Owning Items Makes Me Anxious Depressed…

This topic contains 4 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by Profile photo of Julie Julie 1 week, 6 days ago.

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  • #234600
    Profile photo of Unrealisk
    Unrealisk
    Member

    I’ve looked up “reverse hoarding” and came up empty but I am a natural minimalist and over the last 3 years I’ve been shrinking my belongings more and more. My other half moved in last year and he had a considerable amount of items to bring in. I suffered a few anxiety attacks but eventually calmed down and accepted the items. I’m okay with them because they do not belong to me. I don’t want anything. I could live in a hotel room with bare bones minimum. I’ve been in abusive relationships in the past including one where I obtained a restraining order. I want to at least have some things and not hurt knowing I own them. Items overwhelm me and really make it hard to handle. I don’t want to make my significant other suffer from this, he is clean and he’s already made sacrifices. I love minimal but I feel I want to take it to the extreme. I think I still suffer from depression and anxiety even though I try to look past it. I don’t get much pleasure out of anything anymore let alone pay attention to whatever it is… Any idea what’s going on?

  • #234604
    Profile photo of roepl
    roepl
    Member

    It sounds like you’ve had some rough times, and they’ve left you with some lingering stress and anxiety. Is it possible that maybe you’re projecting those feelings into your stuff? Get rid of the stuff, get rid of the anxiety. That’s actually not a bad coping mechanism. It’s a lot less harmful than some of the other methods for relieving stress, like alcohol, illegal drugs, legal drugs, anonymous encounters with strangers, bar fights, or producing and starring in your own reality show. But there are other methods to relive stress which might be useful add-ons for you. Exercise. Meditation. Talking to someone sympathetic. A hug…

  • #308875
    Profile photo of meghank
    meghank
    Participant

    Hording can be triggered by a traumatic experience, or a series of traumatic experiences, so I wonder if there could be a connection. But whether or not a connection exists has very little relevance to your situation. Does having very little stuff negatively impact your life? Does it interfere with your daily living? If so, I would recommend you see a therapist who specializes in trauma. She can help you to explore the issue more than any advice on the internet could.

  • #309793
    Profile photo of adorita
    adorita
    Participant

    I’ve also wondered what is the term for the opposite of hoarders. I suppose it is too rare to have a name.

    For me, I feel anxious when I have too much stuff, anxious when I don’t have enough. It is a very fine balance that can only be described as a “diet-like” behaviour. I’ve moved 20 times in my 36 years on earth, trice internationally – having stuff is often a burden especially with chronic pain. On the other hand, I feel deep remorse when I have to buy the stuff I had thrown out or given away. I also feel very annoyed when I HAVE TO go out to buy things such as toilet paper or salt. I appreciate a well-stocked home.

    We are shaped by our childhood. My frequent moves and my grandparents’ well-stock home is probably how I feel about stuff. Perhaps you may have some childhood issue with stuff that is causing your anxiety. Anxiety is the feeling of threat without actual danger. If you can work out what is actually bothering you, and learned that it really isn’t a threat anymore. You may be able to relax.

  • #309794
    Profile photo of Julie
    Julie
    Participant

    For me, the best way to get rid of anxiety is to focus on something that makes me feel good or better. It is a way that I have trained my mind to always think of memories, thing, people or places that make me feel good. Focusing on getting rid of anxiety only makes me more anxious. Change your point of focus. If you walk into someones home and their clutter makes you feel uneasy then change your focus. Learning to train my mind to be focused has been fun and is a continual ongoing pursuit of mine. I had high blood pressure and took anti-hypertensives for over 10 yrs. After actively working on my thoughts I have normal blood pressure and have not had any medication for 3 yrs.

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