Through decluttering, what have you found out about yourself?

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Through decluttering, what have you found out about yourself?

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Started 1 month ago by AJ
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AJ
Member

I always thought I wasn't very sentimental about things, but after decluttering I realise I have zero sentimentality about things. It rather shocks me how little stuff means to me.

My OH claimed to not be sentimental about things, but in the process of decluttering he's found himself to be more sentimental than he would like to be.

I've also been a "straightener" but it used to be straightening piles of stuff so they "looked" a bit tidier! But now the place is decluttered, everything has to be straightening. Books, furniture, etc. My OH said "Enough" when I got out the spirit level to check whether the tv was straight. The perfectionist in me that originally stopped me from decluttering (everything had to be decluttered perfectly and precisely) has come to the fore. And that I do find disconcerting.

So what have you found out about yourself, good or bad, during decluttering?

Posted 1 month ago #
toberead
Member

One thing I've noticed is that your uncluttering strategy depends a lot on your circumstances. Six months ago I moved into an apartment that has a washing machine, the first time in 18 years that I've had my own. And it has made me rethink my wardrobe. When I had to spend 3-4 hours in a noisy laundromat every time I wanted to wash a load of clothes, it made sense to have at least 3 weeks worth of clothes, and I made that work in the most uncluttered way possible. But now I can see much more clearly which clothes I really love, and which ones I wore just because it was better than going to the laundromat. I've run into other issues like this - what I need and use and what I can discard depends a lot on where I'm living, what I'm doing, what my job is like, etc. There's more than one way to be uncluttered - if I ever move out of my apartment into a house, I'm sure my uncluttering strategy will have to change again.

I have also discovered that I'm more influenced by the way I was raised than I might have thought. My Mom was very organized, and I definitely got that from her, but she grew up on a farm during the Depression, and she was very much a "save every piece of string because you might use it later" person. She saved everything. That worked for her because she lived in a huge house out in the country, and she had room for her collections of empty margarine tubs and scraps of fabric. But I live a very different lifestyle, and I have to force myself to let go of things that I don't need today - and not hear my Mom's voice in my head, saying "you should really save that, you might use it someday." (Or if I hear it, I have to tell myself to ignore it most of the time.)

Posted 1 month ago #
Sky
Member

Decluttering my home has made me look at "things" differently. The more I get rid of, the more I want less and less. I love having space in drawers and closets. I even have some empty drawers!

I've realized how few things I really want beyond whats necessary. No more collecting, storing and shopping. It is freeing beyond belief.

Posted 1 month ago #
badkitti
Member

I too am less sentimental now - time to go through my overflowing memories box I think!

I think I take more care in buying clothes - this year's resolution is to only get clothes that look good on me and fit properly.

Posted 1 month ago #
AJ
Member

Yes, as Sky said, the process of decluttering makes us look at things differently. We have sentimental stuff, never look at it, but still give it meaning.

badkitti, have you ever had your colours done,e.g. Color Me Beautiful? I found that I could shop within my colour palette and get rid of the clothes which didn't suit me. One colour palette means things go well together. I don't need the one-pair-of-shoes-which-only-go-with-one-outfit anymore.

Posted 1 month ago #
Zora
Member

I start things and don't finish them. That's why I had such a lot of sewing clutter. I am pushing myself to give away, throw away, or finish.

Watched the latest Hoarders episode while mending a beautiful antique woolen shawl that I had stored away for years. It's going to take a LOT of work, but will be gorgeous when done ... and I can give it to my daughter.

Posted 1 month ago #
bandicoot
Member

what a thought-provoking topic...thanks for starting it.
i have enjoyed reading all the replies.

i have found out that my clutter is chiefly caused by travel and inertia.
travel; because i pick up foreign gewgaws all the time.
because then it's CULTURE, it isn't just rubbish, lol.
inertia; stuff comes into this house and has nowhere to live, so it just sorta stagnates and piles up.

now that i have identified these two trouble spots, i am right on top of them.
i've just got back from two weeks in hong kong and korea and i bought: seaweed of various kinds (edible), korean chilli powder and korean chilli paste.
gifts? korean chilli paste in tubes. so i am not cluttering anyone else either.

as for the inertia, i am working hard on that.
i consciously maintain my cleared-out hotspots on a daily basis.
you all know those areas where stuff collects and then snowballs? yeah, those!
i am not letting them get a toehold to begin with.

Posted 1 month ago #
themusiclivez
Member

I am choosing new clothes carefully (focusing on items that look good on me, as well as quality). I don't mind having less if it means I can have nicer items!

Secondly, I really find, like Sky mentioned, that I want less as I get rid of more things. I have a bookshelf that used to be so crammed with books, magazines, photo albums and the like; now it is half empty and there are still more things that I feel I can get rid of without being upset about it.

I also discovered that I never really like having a lot of items - I was always going through things I had to try and find what I could get rid of. But now I am able to stop these items from entering my home in the first place!

Posted 1 month ago #
BarbaraTako
Member

Decluttering has helped me become less attached to "stuff" and it has freed up time for me to focus on real priorities (faith, friends, family, interests). Getting rid of clutter helps me make better choices and manage my time/life better.

Posted 1 month ago #
Sky
Member

AJ....What an excellent subject. I, too am a perfectionist and have always been organized, or so I thought. Now, with less stuff, everything has to be lined up just so. There is no hiding crookedness!
I may be moving from perfectionist to OCD....

Posted 1 month ago #
AJ
Member

Barbara, that sounds great! We think we need stuff to improve our lives and then find out that the stuff actually eats into our lives, and that we are better off without a lot of it!

Along the way, I have also realised that I dislike knick-knacks. I didn't truly realise how much I dislike the things till I received one for Christmas.

Posted 1 month ago #
nellieb
Member

I am realizing how little most things mean to me. I also realize I had a lot of things that were not that exciting to me, I kept them around from habit.

It's very freeing to get rid of stuff!

Yet I still have too much! Can't wait to sell my bedroom furniture, I bought it 28 years ago and am ready to let go! My tastes have changed and I can visualize how my bedroom will look with furniture I love.

I want space, open, uncluttered space, all around me! And fantastic art on my walls! I continue to reduce my shoes and clothes, love not having a huge selection and items sitting around that never looked that great on me.

And the lessons I am learning...to stop spending money on things that are not that important to me. I have bought almost nothing (other than consumables) since mid December. Another lesson is to stop giving people things they might consider clutter and find out what is really important to that person so I can gift them with meaningful memories.

Many of you have checked out my personal blog (prior to my realizing I could have used this forum!) about my desire to eliminate 50% of my items during 2010. So far, I've released 295 items from my life and don't miss any of them! I photographed the items so I can always look back and remember what I once thought was important to me.

Posted 1 month ago #
AJ
Member

nellieb - And you help other people to do the same. That must be quite satisfying, and probably very frustrating at times.

Posted 1 month ago #
charmed2482
Member

I have found I don't really care as much about stuff as I used to. I was always keeping things because they were useful even though I was more than likely never going to use them, like a pile of empty notebooks I didn't need. I got rid of all the extra paper I had sitting around and my boyfriend did the same thing, I can always get more paper if I really need it. I also hate nick knacks too. I dislike things that don't serve a purpose. I don't mind having some arty things but they can't be in my way at all.

I also despise paper, I'm talking, receipts, pay stubs, bills, and all the random pieces of paper that manage to find their way into my apartment. Including instruction manuals(scanned or found them online and got rid of the paper copy). I hate organizing paper and looking through it when I need something(which is rarely), so I have one binder with a few important things and that's. Mostly tax papers, car title, and Birth certificate. I keep two or three pay stubs and that's. I've only needed pay stubs to get loans and I won't be getting any loans any time soon so it can't be that important to keep them. Plus my job offers to let us stop getting the paper all together and I can view them online if I set it up, so it can't be that important to keep those.

I learned that I can let go of all the things that are not important to me and focus on the things that are and I don't have to listen to my mom when she things I should keep something. If I wasted money on something, its better to just chuck it(or donate or whatever) than holding onto it wishing I had not wasted money on it in the first place.

No amount of stuff will ever make me happy!

Posted 1 month ago #
Jeri Dansky
Member

AJ, I had my colors done a few years ago, and it was a huge help. I did indeed get rid of almost everything that wasn't in my color palette (with a few favorite t-shirts being the exception), and now I'm firm about only buying things that are in my palette. They DO look better on me - and, as you say, they all go together.

Posted 1 month ago #
Laetitia in Australia
Member

Colour palettes - keep in mind that this may need to be done again as you age - most people's skin changes hue as they age and commonly lighter colours look better on old skin, particularly for Caucasians.

I am SO hearing things from my childhood in these responses - my father was born in 1930 so he very much has had "(but) I might need that one day" as a mantra. There was a time when my mum used part of his stash for a temporary repair and he said that; we all turned around and said, "Yes, that day is TODAY."

What have I been learning? I really can live without all those things that I thought I HAD to have / couldn't do without.

Posted 1 month ago #
sakeenah
Member

I think I have found out the I really do have ADD or close to it, was very hyper as a child, etc, and have done a lot of reflection on why disorganization has been such a huge issue for me. I understand when people on Hoarders say this room looks the inside of my head. I have discovered that clutter and mental chaos is a vicious cycle. I can't wait for one to be in order to work on the other. Cleaning makes me feel better mentally and taking some time out for me mentally to focus on something other then the way the mess makes me feel relaxes me enough to want to keep trying

Posted 1 month ago #
themusiclivez
Member

sakeenah - I agree with you! When I get rid of things I feel like it clears my mind, like it's one less thing to think about.

Posted 1 month ago #
charmed2482
Member

It will be much easier to keep from losing things, if you don't have so many things in the first place!

just found a disk i have been trying to find for several days now

Posted 1 month ago #
vjb
Member

Oh boy, charmed2482, I've discovered I despise paper too. Unclutterer has inspired me to go as paperless as I can. I'm currently putting all my recipes into a recipe program. After that, I'm going to cull/scan my financial papers.

It's funny, I've never been a hoarder, but just recently I've started getting rid of 'perfectly good' things I 'might need', 'like to look at but don't use', 'other people gave me'. It's been a revelation. It's like when I look at the areas I've decluttered, I no longer have a whole bunch of mental reservations floating through my head. I love it! And I enjoy the stuff I've kept so much more. From now on I'm just going to be utterly ruthless.

Posted 1 month ago #

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