The "List of Fifteen"

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Started 2 years ago by Betharu
Latest reply from chacha1
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Betharu
Member

I love making lists and then, having the satisfaction of crossing things off.

Every night, before I go to bed, I make a list of items I want to accomplish the next day. During the week, it is 10 items - due to the time constraints of that little thing I call a job. On the weekends, it is usually 15 to 20 items.

Now don't get scared - they are all not heavy duty items like scrubbing the bathroom floor or cleaning out my closets. Today's list has such items as emailing a friend about scheduling a dinner, renewing my vehicle registration online, and sending a donation in memory of a friend's father.

I have only two rules -
[1] I don't put on the list anything I should be doing as a regular part of living - i.e. making my bed, cleaning the cat's litter box, etc.
[2] Anything that doesn't get done goes to the top of the list the next day.

Anyone have similar systems?

Posted 2 years ago #
Sky
Member

I, too make a list every night of my goals for the next day. Plus I have a running list of things to do around my house. I usually have 3 things per day on my list to accomplish in addition to regular chores. 10 is a very lofty ideal!

Posted 2 years ago #
trillie
Member

Wow, 15 is a lot, even if it's just small tasks.

I'm still finding my system, I've been struggling with my time management and trying to find out what works for me. I was (and still am) a world class procrastinator and only worked well under pressure (read: during the nights before the deadline), and just realized during the last year that the constant worrying and bad conscience and of course the strain of the last minute working were stressing me more than I knew. Now, I try to define 3 important things per day and try to do them, but sometimes the overwhelmed procrastinator creeps back in and I can't seem to be able to decide between "urgent", "important" and "wanted to do this for a long time and always put it off". So, often I cheat and add an easy item like "make my bed" to the list just to give myself a feeling of accomplishment. And having my bed made and getting 2 important things done is still better than getting nothing done :o)

Posted 2 years ago #
Claycat
Member

Gosh, trillie, procrastination is my biggest problem, too. It's right up there with lack of energy.

Posted 2 years ago #
bandicoot
Member

*stop procrastinating* is top of my list too.
but i always put it off until the next day.

Posted 2 years ago #
365lessthings
Member

I like to make lists also, but usually when I have a busy day coming up and am likely to forget something. I do love to cross things of lists and be able to see what I have accomplished at the end of the day.

When I know I am going to have some time up my sleave I like to make a list in advance usually of things I have been avoiding for one reason or another. That way when I see it I know I have no excuse since I have free time.

I also like to do the easy things on the list first because then I feel like I am off to a flying start and I get more inspired to keep going.

When I find myself procrastinating I stop and consider the fact that I probably feel worse about the procrastinating than I would about just doing what it is I am avoiding and just get on with it.
http://www.365lessthings.com

Posted 2 years ago #
bandicoot
Member

ooooo yes! listing the most unappetizing item first, and getting it done, and ticking it off, gives me such enormous momentum that the rest of the list almost finishes itself.
it's a smart little strategy for people like me who need to trick ourselves from time to time.

Posted 2 years ago #
Claycat
Member

A lot of time management people call that "Do the worst first!", bandicoot! I agree that seems to be a good idea. Now, if I can just get myself to do it... :)

Posted 2 years ago #
Claycat
Member

LOL! Right after I posted that about the worst first, I checked out Unclutter's link for March 27, and that was in the first link!

Posted 2 years ago #
Laetitia in Australia
Member

Ding, ding, ding, ding...I'm having bells go off because I've just been reading about "Unrelenting Standards" lifetrap. A common thing that goes along with this is procrastination as sufferers don't want to do activity X unless they're sure of doing X perfectly. It's the dark side of, "If a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing right."

Posted 2 years ago #
bandicoot
Member

laetitia, i've struggled with that one all my life.
i am slowly learning that it's better to finish a thing than to wait around endlessly until it is finished perfectly.
because we know it's NEVER finished perfectly!

Posted 2 years ago #
Claycat
Member

Gosh, I sure am in good company here! Unrelenting standards?! I will definitely have to check that out! That sounds like me! Eek!

Posted 2 years ago #
Claycat
Member

I may have that combined with rebelliousness! Awful!

Posted 2 years ago #
Laetitia in Australia
Member

I'm reading about it (and other lifetraps) in Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young and Janet Klosko. Don't worry - there's hope for us all. :-)

Posted 2 years ago #
trillie
Member

Oh noes, my jaw just dropped. I've always known I am a perfectionist in certain areas (sorting my CDs alphabetically, just the right wording in emails/letters, IF I do the dishes I have to do them "properly", and I could worry for hours if the room looks better if the sofa was moved an inch to the right), but right now I think have to accept the fact that those "unrelenting standards" could be the root of all evil in all areas. Thank you for the lightbulb over my head, Laetitia! ;o)

Posted 2 years ago #
365lessthings
Member

Laetitia, you are so right! My father always said "A job worth doing is worth doing well" it really sticks in your head and it can be closely followed by the dark side. I am glad he instilled that in me but it can be a fine line sometimes.

I will check out the book you mentioned at the library. You might want to read The Comfort Trap by Judith Sills. Being a perfectionist can sometimes cause you to stay safe within your comfort zone rather that risk putting yourself out there.

Beware all you hoarders out there and re-think your motives behind your habit. Quite often hoarders are perfecitonist that just gave up trying to keep there lives in order. Everything in moderation.

Posted 2 years ago #
chacha1
Member

I think keeping a list of 10 or 15 to-do's would have me feeling constantly pressured. I keep a running "projects" list and a calendar, with the major things I've committed to do marked on the calendar and everything else on the projects list.

I don't commit to more than one evening/social thing on weekdays, unless there's a looming deadline (like right now, DH and I are in heavy prep for a competition so it's "practice" or "meet coach at studio" or "add more rhinestones to ballgown").

I know perfectly well that most days I am not going to have the time or energy to work on projects after coming home from the office, so I don't feel bad about leaving those things for the weekend - and thus off any sort of daily to-do list.

I'm looking at my desk, though, and I see that I have my list of ideas for blog posts, my calendar & project list, and some emails from my Mom all out in front of me, and this morning had two other things that I've since taken care of (thank heaven for Internet access), so I guess in a way I have my "list."

Posted 2 years ago #
Mercury600
Member

There is an amazing iPhone/iPod app for this: Today.

It's a simple list, clean interface and arranges things by "Today" "Yesterday" "Tomorrow" and "Someday". The app can be set to auto populate the day with the stuff you didn't get done the day before.

I LOVE IT.

Posted 2 years ago #
Lorihav
Member

A favorite quote of a friend of mine's is:
"Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly until you learn to do it well."
I think about that a lot, needing to get myself in gear. Now off to do the homework I'm procrastinating!

Posted 2 years ago #
terriok
Member

There is some mind-boggling research down by Seth Godin about the "reptilian brain". That refers to the limbic portion of the brain that is basically used for survival.

I have been battling with it constantly. I wake up and proceed to nag myself to do things that I am going to do anyway- like brush my teeth etc. I get down on myself for getting down on myself and have been at a loss as how to control it.

But his research has truly "reframed" my thinking.

Instead of getting down on myself for nagging myself I have been thanking my reptilian brain. "Thanks for the reminder!" It is doing its' job and has been doing it quite well. It is actually comforting (and I never thought I'd get there).

The same can be extended insofar as perfectionism is concerned. I also tend to be super-organized or not.

Yet no one does everything or anything (for that matter) perfectly so just do the best you can and let it go. Easier said than done I know!

I have hoarding tendencies and have had them since I was a little kid. A lot of it is related to PTSD which I confirmed with a psychologist from "Hoarders".

One can take photos of stuff you really do not want to part with but no longer need. I also think in terms of how much space an item is going to take up. I learned that from travelling. No one received sombreros from México from me- silver or turquoise or black coral is pretty and is light.

I save political (etc) buttons and I can have a entire collection and so what? I have that much room easily. Books are a real problem but I love them with a passion so I am just trying to keep the ones I really want.

Now many books are public domain so I do not need all the classics. I can find them free on Gutenberg. Almost all info can be obtained online. And anything else you can find on Ebay and/or Amazon!

Seth's research really is focused on creativity. I need to delve into it. I am a great one for the unattainable. If I cannot do it perfectly... well... I get sidetracked. I love arts and crafts and have so much "stuff" but I found a neat rolling cart and everything is at least under control. I am not ready to part with the cool stuff and that is okay. I forgive myself. (Or I am trying.)

I'll move on to what I can get done.

Same goes for writing. I love to write with a passion. I have routinely been writing 20 page letters since I was a kid. I excel at it. All that practice sure helped. But I want to write perfectly. I also get too many ideas (same thing with crafts). Just like insofar as this comment is concerned. HA!

Also a few years ago, most of my stuff was stored with relatives. I had very little stuff. It was not the answer to all my problems.

But the most effective therapy is watching an episode of "Hoarders'! LOL.

"Yumm, tamales!"

Posted 2 years ago #

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