My house causes me stress because I am a very messy person, so my kids have learned to be very messy people, and my husband says that he is not messy BUT as far as I can tell, he is only tidy if EVERYTHING ELSE is tidy - it never crosses his mind that maybe he should help GET THINGS TIDY. Also I have too much stuff. Anyway, I usually do the stash and dash, and I have boxes from almost three years ago that I still haven't gone through. I am working on my kitchen right now, but it seems very slow. Usually I only get it actually cleaned up if there is a birthday party coming up. Since I don't have that panicky 2 day away deadline, I seem to be getting just one counter or area cleaned up every day, and even at that, some things are still getting stuck in a box for later either to decide what to do with it or to find it a permanent home when things are cleared out more. I would sound the same no matter which room I was dealing with. Still, my plan is to have the entire upstairs presentable within the next two months (no more piles of boxes up here, reasonably clean, company paperwork up to date even if I don't have everything filed), and then I will begin to tackle the disaster that is my basement. I think that once I have the habit of doing a little bit every day, it will carry over well into the basement part. Plus by then, I expect I will be much more ruthless about culling things, which will also help in dealing with all the boxes and piles.
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Posted 1 year ago #
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margaret, you can totally do this.
small things, done persistently, have an incredible cumulative effect.
you are on the right track.
it doesn't matter where you started or where you are right now.
what matters is where you are heading.Posted 1 year ago # -
I just had a kind of a-ha moment today. I get caught up with SOME things about how I should sell them etc to recoup some value. However, there is a lot of stuff that gets ruined because I have left it out, not taken care of it, etc (e.g. strawberries that didn't get put in the fridge and went moldy, markers that go dry because no one puts the lids on and by the time I find them, it's too late, wet anything that did not get into the laundry fast enough and ended up moldy or mildewed). Anyway, I was tossing out a couple of things that were spoiled or not worth the effort to clean, and I thought, gee, I have no problem getting rid of this stuff that HAD LOST ITS VALUE because of my messy house and habits, so why get so hung up on donating things that have RETAINED some value but which get in the way of cleaning up my messy house.
Posted 1 year ago # -
aren't epiphanies the best? one can read others' experiences, and look at and ponder her own situation, then BAM everything makes sense somehow. Love it, Margaret!
and Bandicoot, how inspiring:
"small things, done persistently, have an incredible cumulative effect"Posted 1 year ago # -
When I need to be brutal about getting rid of things I call in my secret weapon -- my best friend. She talks me through the anxiety of indecision. I can hand her something that's too tough for me to get rid of and she will make it disappear. (I've done the same for her.)
Most of our uncluttering efforts are trashed or donated to Goodwill, but we've been known to have the occasional garage sale. Our last one was this past weekend. We started at 6 a.m. and were sold out by 11 a.m. My experience with garage sales is that you have to price items insanely cheap or they're not going to move. A shiny new item still in the original package MIGHT get 25% of what you paid for it. Most things we priced at 1/10th to 1/20th of what we paid for them originally. It was a great deal of work, but fifteen boxes of clutter are gone from my home. I made $200, but the bulk of that was from selling big items -- an adult trike, an upholstered chair, and three sets of china from the 50s.
If you're facing overwhelming amounts of clutter, you need to see progress, and quickly. Start by throwing away the worst and sending better things to a charity. Put the "valuable" items aside until the end, but don't let them take over your life. Sometimes it's just better to consider the money you spent on that stuff a stupid tax, and learn from it.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Ha. ElFish1, I use the term stupid tax too. And you're lucky to have a friend like that. I feel like all my family & friends are acolytes of Justin Case, Sentimental and Value and they'd talk me into keeping things instead of helping purge.
Posted 1 year ago # -
LOVE that expression--stupid tax!
my BFF--since we were 10--is a big purger. So it has been part of our shared history to hang out at each other's houses and go through closets brutally etc. Even as adults, usually we would do a declutter on our own, then for the things undecided, have the other swing by for tea and critique. And sometimes when we were just cleaning we would have the other over to follow around and chat for company. Both of us are on-going unclutterers forever, pretty much.
Now we live very far apart but that is what cameras and photo attachments are for. So I will take photos of myself with a timer and tripod in clothes, for example, and she will yay or nay them via email. Same with stuff. If I am in a but-will-I-need-this-ever? mode she is the first to say nope! toss!, and, on the very odd occasion, "keep".
Posted 1 year ago # -
djk - What a great idea! My bff also leaves really far away from me and we also used to declutter together. I love the picture email idea!
Posted 1 year ago # -
oooh do it! it is a moment's work to set up a tripod and hit the timer button and pose!
Posted 1 year ago # -
librarygal, my best friend and I started out being clutterers and have learned the joys of uncluttering together. Maybe you could plant the seed with a friend or family member. Watching one of those hoarding shows ought to get them on board!
Posted 1 year ago # -
@ElFish1
I wish. Maybe in time. I have a couple of friends who talk very excitedly about decluttering, but when discussing their clutter (as defined by them), or if I tell them what I'm purging, they go on and on about how they can't get rid of such and such, or how I should't get rid of such and such because what if I need it someday? Etc. I have offered a million times to help one friend in particular (either help her make decisions or just hangout and keep her on task), but she never takes me up on it.So I have friends who are interested in decluttering, but for now it's the idea more than the reality to them. I figure the best thing for me to do is keep uncluttering by myself, keep up the dialogue, and be a resource for them when they're ready.
It would be nice to have a declutter buddy now though. But that's what you guys are, right?! :)
Posted 1 year ago # -
@librarygal: I hear you.
Posted 1 year ago # -
yes indeed, you guys are my declutter buddies.
Posted 1 year ago # -
ElFish1 -- A stupid tax is EXACTLY what it is. I wish I didn't have to keep paying it all the time, though!!!
Posted 1 year ago # -
@librarygal, I feel your pain! I hope they get with the plan. I guess this is one time you'll have to lead by example. And you can always tell US what you're decluttering.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Margaret, I know how you feel. I do find that before I buy something now I have to visualize not just bringing it into my house, but where it's going to live once it's inside. That's stopped me from buying several things lately.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Yes, thinking about where I will put something, and will I still like it in the future has stopped me from buying things at festivals, craft shows, etc.
Posted 1 year ago #
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