I feel like I’ve been decluttering all my life and am not done yet. I’ve come a long way. My parents died when I was a teenager. My father’s mother died three days before he did. Consequently, I was left with two three-bedroom homes to clear out at the age of 18. I have very little family. Some family did show up at that time and took what they wanted – an entire tractor trailer in fact. It was a blessing. We also donated a lot.
However, I’m still coming across things that I haven’t used in over 20 years. These are items someone else owned, that mean nothing to me. These items may or may not be worth something.
My problem is this. Whenever I start talking to someone about decluttering - a friend, a relative, a coworker – they tell me I can’t get rid of item X because of Y. This happens a lot! I’m ready to toss these magazines. Friends response “Oh, you can’t get rid of those. They’re history!”. I’m having these 35mm slides scanned then I’m tossing them. Their response “Oh, I’d never throw those out!”. I’m thinking of getting rid of grandmother’s china and keeping just 6 dessert plates. Their response, “No one ever gave me china! How could you get rid of that? Besides, it’s worth a lot of money”.
When I offer these items to family or friends they refuse, of course. I tend to like to trash or donate. I don’t want to sell stuff. This just adds to the procrastination.
Given that often a reason for our clutter is the inability to make decisions regarding what to do with stuff, I find this negative talk extremely unhelpful. Obviously, the answer is to declutter privately. But, I would actually like some support around my decisions. Does anyone have any suggestions for building up the courage to go it alone and to trust in your decisions? How do I brace myself for the inevitable condemnation when someone, probably years from now, asks me what I did with item X and I tell them I donated it?
