Going Gray

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Started 1 year ago by Amy
Latest reply from chacha1
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Amy
Member

Here's a question for you other old ladies...

I turned 55 last month. I have been coloring my hair for the past 10 years and I am sick of putting harmful chemicals 1/4 inch from my brain that will probably develop Alzheimers in a few years.

I have an inch of gray roots now and I am thinking I might not ever color my hair again.

I mean, who am I kidding, the rest of me looks 55, menopot and all.

I am just wondering if there are any others who are considering simplifying their life by eliminating the time and expense of coloring their hair.

Or do you think it's like giving up?

Posted 1 year ago #
themusiclivez
Member

I don't think it's like giving up! Sometimes we just need to embrace what we have. A woman I knew for years went completely gray when she was in her 30s. She was beautiful nonetheless.

Posted 1 year ago #
chacha1
Member

I would let my hair go natural if it would look halfway decent on me. Unfortunately it wouldn't. I am probably close to 70% gray but I don't have beautiful silver Anne Bancroft gray. I have squirrel gray with schnauzer texture. Nice on a dog ... on me? Not so much.

Coloring it smooths the texture as well as giving me back my real age (44). I refuse to worry about the chemicals, as I am fairly confident no commercial hair colorants contain the chemicals that enable transdermal penetration.

But this is one of those purely individual things. If you think you could live with your gray, just let it grow in, maybe get a new haircut, and then see how you like it. The great thing about hair is no matter what you do to it, it can almost always be changed. :-)

Posted 1 year ago #
Amy
Member

Thanks Music! What got me started on this was a conversation with a gorgeous woman I ran into at the store with waist length salt & pepper hair. She was beautiful, and I thought maybe it was time to move on to the next phase. If I start now, by the time I am 60, my hair will be that long and that color, too.

Posted 1 year ago #
Zora
Member

I once saw an article about a Russian woman who had become an Orthodox nun. The article showed two pictures:

The woman before she entered the convent. Her hair was dyed blonde and she wore a lot of makeup and jewelry. Her face looked tense and strained.

The woman after she had spent time in the convent. Her face was scrubbed clean and a kerchief covered most of her hair, leaving only a few wisps of brown-grey at the edges. Her face was relaxed and smiling.

I would rather look like the AFTER picture. I'm not a nun; I'm not even good at doing my daily meditation. I believe I'd be more attractive if I did the meditation than if I dyed my (grey)hair.

Posted 1 year ago #
ArtGal
Member

Amy, I don't think you are giving up at all...maybe it is a step toward your more authentic self. I quit the hard-dye about a year ago...I did use a temp-dye (that washes out after 20 or so shampoos) for about 6 months just so I didn't have a definite dye-line as it was growing out. I love my "new" hair...I hadn't seen it in over 30 years! Initially, you may get some negativity from friends and family...I think that has more to do with them FEELING older than you LOOKING older. My mom had a harder time with my gray hair than I did! :) Go for it!

Posted 1 year ago #
cottagegirl124
Member

The most beautiful sophisticated women I know shave their head when they turn grey it is beautiful and it says screw the world I am a beautiful confident older woman. And if you don't like it it will grow back out and since you already only have a little bit of grey it will cut off the old color and you can start fresh. Personally I shave my head with a #1 on the clipper and it grew out to a nice length in 6 months. But I shaved it again it is very addictive to just get up and wash your hair with a washcloth and go to work. My hair is dark brown not grey but the grey looks better shaved.

Posted 1 year ago #
Sophie
Member

I'm not old yet...though nearly 40. I have been coloring my hair since I was in my late 20s. It started out for fashion reasons, but then just became a case of having too as it looked bad with re-growth, sometimes from blonding it (I'm brunette). Then from about 33 the greys started appearing. Even today there are only a few around the sides and on top that I can see. Anyway when 38-39 I was pregnant with my first child and decided not to color it, also the hairstylist said I'd need a medical certificate for him to color. Well lo and behold I discovered my hair and the grey really weren't so bad. The compromise now is I will spread out time between colors and chose ones that most closely match my natural color. I don't think we should feel pressured to color our hair:)

Posted 1 year ago #
Amy
Member

What a great way of looking at it, ArtGal...my authentic self. It's not just being tired of putting junk on your hair, it's accepting who you are.

Posted 1 year ago #
bandicoot
Member

i suggested to my mother that she go gray several years ago.
best thing she ever did.
her hair is a beautiful colour and it's healthy and easy to style.
and she has all that spare time and money for things she really loves.

Posted 1 year ago #
Claycat
Member

My hair is gray, turning white. I'm 60, and I haven't ever colored it, except for a few streaks in my 20s. I'm glad it's this way. It is so much easier.

Posted 1 year ago #
JuliaJayne
Member

This topic is so timely for me. I actually thought of not dying my hair for the first time yesterday. The only problem is that, like Chichi's, the texture of my hair is better colored than not. I wish that could be resolved with a product.

I think people reach a certain point where they look better with their natural gray than they do with color in their hair. So I don't see not coloring your hair as giving up. Maybe, unconsciously, we just know when it is time for us to accept the gray. I don't know if I'm there yet, but I love the idea of switching to temporary color until the permanent die is grown out.

Posted 1 year ago #
Babs
Member

I stopped coloring my hair last January. I was just so tired of the expense and the time required to maintain it. I read the book Going Gray by Anne Kreamer and I realized that I wasn't fooling anyone but myself. Since it was no longer pleasant or confidence boosting for me, I let it go. It took a good nine months to grow out and there was an awkward skunk stage but I love not having to book an appointment and spend hours at the salon (let alone the money). I have found it very liberating and wouldn't go back to coloring.

Posted 1 year ago #
trillie
Member

Haircoloring as clutter... interesting idea :o) I'm 30 and haven't discovered any grey hairs yet, but if I'm similar to my mom in respect to hair as well (I am in a lot of things), I'll be fully grey by the time I'm 35. I believe that one should try to be one's authentic self (as mentioned here before) and that we should be happy how we are... and I think I won't color my hair when it goes grey... then again, I didn't have the shock of "OMG I have a grey hair I'm officially OLD boohoohoo" yet, so ask me again when I did ;o)

@JuliaJayne, about the texture thing: Have you tried dyeing your hair in your natural color (there are grey dyes too, or light blondes could work for greyish hair, does anyone know?), I mean with the ones that are non-permanent (approx. 4-8 weeks colors) -- I found in the past that they work better for my hair than any deep conditioner, and if you pick the right shade, you don't see a color difference.

Posted 1 year ago #
irishbell
Member

I have a fairly pale complexion and dark brown hair, so when those rogue, kinky, unmanageable grays started showing up 15 years ago I was horrified, and have been coloring my hair since then. I get a cut, color and highlights once every three months or so, 2 hours tops, and then color the regrowth myself once a month, 90 minutes tops. If I go a couple months without touching it up,I feel it makes me look tired, haggard and much older and I'm not happy with the way it looks on me. To me it's not a nuisance or clutter and it keeps me feeling good. I feel true and authentic to myself with my dyed hair! I don't think I'll ever stop coloring.

Posted 1 year ago #
susanp5
Member

I registered just to respond to this post!

I'm about the same age as the OP. I've been 'natural' for about two years. Don't regret it. Not going back. There are shampoos for gray hair which keep the yellow out. Pantene is the easiest one to find.

I'm fortunate in that I have the "good" shade of gray, lots of silver, not flat. So I'm not sure if the shampoo will help that or not.

Posted 1 year ago #
terriok
Member

I use to have a "colorist" color my hair.

Now I do not have the $ and just use L'oreal which looks just as good for a single color. You just wash it in.

I do not do it as often as I should though.

If hair coloring caused Alzheimer's, there would be a much lower incidence among men.

I love Pantene.

Posted 1 year ago #
chacha1
Member

Like irishbell, I think that coloring is part of expressing my authentic self. I have long hair to please the DH, and if I left it natural I would look drab, old-fashioned, and older than I really am. Coloring it - bright red, thanks! - is part of the persona I enjoy as a creative, athletic middle-aged woman.

That said, if/when he gets hit by a bus, he's well aware the first thing I'm doing is cutting it off. And I might very well then stop coloring it, because without my perfect dance partner, I doubt I would continue competitive dancing.

My favorite color is Garnier "Sweet Pepper." Nine dollars once a month, 90 minutes, ten years younger.

Posted 1 year ago #
charmed2482
Member

I'm 28 and Ive had grey and white hairs since I was 20. They never bothered me till they decided to gather together in small patch in the front of my head along my hair line on the right side where everyone can see it and wonder why the hell I have a patch of grey hair on one spot and no other visible ones(unless you get really really really close) anywhere else. and Yes people actually make comments about it, one of my cousins just commented this past weekend, my dad has noticed and my boyfriend used to joke about it all the time. I recently got it covered and within a few weeks you could see it again. I am thinking about trying that touch up stuff to see if it helps keep the color longer. I wouldn't care if it wasn't in one patch in the front of my head. And the hairs are all wiry and they stick up and won't lay down with the rest of my hair.

So I think it all depends on how your hair texture and color work together. My mom's grey/silvers are fine, you can see them(she's 48) but they are spread out evenly through out her hair and don't really bother her much. I wouldn't bother if it wasn't for the one random patch I have that looks weird where it is. also my hair is really dark brown/black so its really visible where its at. most people are surprised when they see it since I am so young and have had them since I was 20(that I know of).

Posted 1 year ago #
Sky
Member

I love my hair better my natural color. Gray seems so drab on me. It isn't expensive and doesn't take much time so for now....I'm coloring it!

Posted 1 year ago #

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