pack em up and haul em to the goodwill
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Posted 1 month ago #
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yep, get em out of there. sell em, give em donate em.
wouldn't you rather have great parties where you don't worry about a glass breaking than formal parties where you are in terror all night?I went with plain white open source porcelain that comes 4 place settings to a box...JUST like the kind in the food porn photo ops. plain white with small rims, makes the food pop.
same with the drink ware plain and simple and replaceble...the cocktail glasses from the Dollar Store. I put my money and energies into great food and a nice comfortable open space. and this is from someone who had a service of 16 wedgewood and $$$ vintage cambridge crystal when i got married.
the people at the party are more important than the dishes
if you JUST can't part with the china or flatware you have in storage..then DUMP your everday dishes and USE the special dishes for everyday. radical idea, but dishes in storage are no fun at all.
Posted 1 month ago # -
I knew I would fall into this problem, so we avoided it entirely. We didn't register for any china or flatware, and after the wedding we hauled ourselves to the kitchen outlets in the city and bought generic white everything. I have never regretted it.
If you can't bring yourself to use them and hate to get rid of them entirely, I'd keep just one or two to display on those wall plate hangers.
Posted 1 month ago # -
abeline, that is a delightful idea....to keep one to display.
Posted 1 month ago # -
That's what I'm doing, keeping one cup and saucer from each set of china I've inherited. I've offered the sets to my sons and daughter-in-laws and will sell what they don't want.
I can have my tea in a different one every day!Posted 1 month ago # -
Thanks everyone for more thoughts - sorry for the gap in my responses, I went away and somehow wasn't on the RSS feed for this topic! :o(
I am still mixed - new thought might be to try to see how I feel if I do one step, than another. Maybe first USE, then see. And, probably put some away (reality is I'm not going to use 12 RARELY ever!) and that will at least create more room! One thought on Abeline's suggestion might be that seeing them might encourage me to actually USE them too.
So, some different ways to go but taking some action might help me get through my emotional turmoil to a solution? What do you think? Committing to an all or nothing decision scares me in this case -
Posted 1 month ago # -
akcorcoran:
How many usually are at the table at your house - 2? 4?
Put that many settings in with the everyday china, and just *use* it. Put the rest in a box out of the way.
Maybe you'll only be able to bring yourself to use it all at once on Sunday dinner. Maybe you'll just use it mixed in with the everyday china, whatever's on top. ::grin::
If you find yourself not using it *at all*, even though it's right there... Get rid of it. You're not using it, you're not likely to use it, it's only in the way.
Posted 1 month ago # -
Ugh - this topic makes me nauseous because I wish I had become a minimalist BEFORE my wedding 3 years ago. My mother-in-law insisted upon buying us our china. Because I'm not someone who ever cared about these kinds of things, I told her just to buy one in a set (8 place settings per box) from Macys. Well, she bought one and her mother bought us one. Now we have 16 place settings! I am going to use it as soon as I have a bigger place and not care if it breaks. Actually, if some of it breaks, that is fine with me. Between that and the million wine glasses we have, it's overwhelming. Luckily I had my mom guiding me away from the excessive kitchenware during the registry process - I can't even imagine what else I would have ended up with if she hadn't been there to help!
Posted 1 month ago # -
@morfydd, good idea. there's only 4 of us, plus my MIL and FIL who love next door (whole DIFFERENT TOPIC!) - so I'd probably keep out six? I was thinking that I'd give that a try because I can't get rid of it now. I do love what I chose and have hopes that I'll start to be more social as my kids get to be more self-managed. I love when we eat on china at my parents' house - and we do everytime we come (every 4 weeks at least), so I think I will use it. I have two mixed patterns and I'd love to eventually mix in some fun and funky pieces, some colored glass, etc.
@themusiclivez, I hear you but there is so much pressure around registering - and that was a while ago for me and registries weren't really online yet. My sis got married a year and a half ago - and, wow, now it's crazy! But, I know I could still do without things we registered for and got - now sitting in our basement: waffle maker, break maker, quesadilla maker, two sizes of Cuisinarts, shall I go on...? First stop on eBay, maybe?!
Posted 1 month ago # -
akcorcoran - oh man, the quesadilla maker! I have that! Sometimes I really question what I was thinking... There are a few things that might have to be ebayed - I just wish I had returned one of the MANY sets of wine glasses we received. Now they are taking up a shelf in my pantry!
Posted 1 month ago # -
Friends, I think so many of us are keeping things, china, crystal, appliances, etc. only because someone else thinks we should. I keep reading what a burden something is and you don't know what to do with it.
If it doesn't work for you....get rid of it. Do you tell your MIL, Mother, grandmother, etc. what they SHOULD have in their home? I bet the answer is no. We live differently today, much more casual. If they want all that stuff, good. Have fun cleaning and storing it.
It is your home, live with what works for you. You are not your stuff! Only the Queen of England needs 16 place settings of china!
Posted 1 month ago # -
Sky, thank you! It's so true - and it's silly how we feel so obligated to keep things because others want us to. My MIL tried to get me to put 3 coffee pots on my registry because she felt my husband I "needed them". One of them made 50 cups of coffee at a time! I don't even drink coffee! And maybe two of our friends drink coffee, so when were we ever going to use it? I said no way, it's not going on the registry and after that I put my foot down, but unfortunately felt I would "need" the china. I guess I will just use it when I have a dinner party or something. But I am much stronger about putting my foot down now! Why are people always trying to tell us what we need??? Like Sky said, it's not their homes!
Posted 1 month ago # -
After I read this post and commented a while ago, I went to storage this weekend and pulled out my china...washed it and found space in my cabinets so I can use it again! I love mixing my stoneware, china and crystal! And I have enough for entertaining and more importantly, enough so we can eat for a week without having to wash dishes!
All those wedding gifts in the basement...sell them! Donate them! Regift them! Get them out of your life, they are sitting around and unused objects, particularly on the floor or in stacks, distort positive energy! If you don't eat or make waffles, someone else will be thrilled to own your waffle maker!
I laugh at all the items I thought I "needed" and life is much easier with just the few I really do use!
Posted 1 month ago # -
Good for you, nellieb - is it OK to comment that I think it IS OK for things to come back in if you have intention? I applaud that because so much of this is about getting rid of things - but I think it's to make space for the things we should / could value.
Yes, I'm planning on those vacating the premises. You may have seen from other thread that I'm struggling with how to get value from things - (breadmaker was used ONCE!) and eBay is difficult but probably the most $. I need a good home consignment store here really. I have one for my clothes and children's toys / clothes, but the home stuff has been harder to sell locally (without my time).
And, on your last point, as I've been uncluttering, I've been talking to my daughters (6- and 7 1/2- yrs old) about why I'm doing it. That we've accumulated too much stuff over years but more that there is a difference between "want" and "need." If that's a lesson they can learn earlier in life, it will save them this cluttered life - not to mention a LOT of money!
Posted 1 month ago # -
::grin:: I'll point out that my grandmother did and my mother does collect china. And yet I registered for casual *and* formal china for my wedding. Because, darn it, I grew up liking china too!
I ended up giving the casual set to some friends and using the formal stuff. It actually made sense for me to have tons of the formal, as I regularly gave dinner parties for 6-16 people. But the overflow lived in the china cabinet and I only kept 4 out in the kitchen cabinet.
And probably, if my brother doesn't want my parents' wedding china when the time comes, I'll give away mine in favor of theirs. The rest of their collections will not be mine, though. I swear.
(Sorry about the weird tense mixing here - I'm currently living in a new country, where I sadly don't give dinner parties, but have instead just 2 place settings, in still a *new* fun pattern. But the other stuff is still in my US house, being used by my brother looking after the place.)
Posted 1 month ago # -
wow, me and my boyfriend just got some plates and bowls from the dollar store, i have some larger bowls i found at goodwill a long time ago. We will probably just keep using those when/if we get married.
Posted 1 month ago # -
Anyone that is interested, you might be able to find out the value of your china at this link.
Posted 1 month ago # -
Thanks, Claycat - perhaps it's a sign when I can't remember the name of the patterns of my china (2 Limoges patterns?) and my silver! ;-)
Posted 1 month ago # -
Alexa, often the pattern name or ID number of the china is on the underside. The silver usually has the maker name on it.
Posted 1 month ago # -
Oh - thanks! I'll check it out!
Posted 1 month ago #
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