I really find that, for me, decluttering in "layers" has really given me the best results. In my first "sweep" I got rid of the real junk. Then in my second sweep I got rid of even more. I am now at a point where I am getting rid of things that I never knew even bothered me in the first place.
If I don't absolutely love it, then it is mental clutter for me, and out it goes!
This has been my experience, too. in the past, I've always stopped too soon, when the house was free of surface clutter but there was still alot hidden away in boxes, cabinets and drawers. Like you, there are things I wasn't ready to unload on the first pass, or even the second, but as I get more confident in my decisions, more and more leaves the house.
And it feels wonderful! I never realized just how great it feels to let this stuff go! (I also wonder how much time I spent accumulating this stuff in the first place).
I agree, it's just not possible to do it all in one pass. If you come back to a stored box or a collection in a couple more months, you get rid of even more of it. The things you swore were too important to get rid of the first time get reevaluated.
Layers has always been the most effective for me, too. Trying to do it all in one pass is just too stressful, and I find that if I do it all at once, I tend to keep too much overall but also get rid of things I later regret tossing in the pressure to make a decision. I usually end up taking at least four or five passes on an area over the course of a couple of weeks or months.
All-at-once is too fatiguing and too time-consuming for most of us, I suspect. I mean, if there's just one area of a home that is cluttered, that's one thing - it's easy to blitz a single closet. But if EVERYTHING is cluttered (as it was in my case) then guerrilla warfare is so much more sustainable.
I'm with all of y'all. The more stuff goes out, the easier it becomes to make decisions about the remainder.
It does! It's like lifting weights, you get better and better at it as you do it.
But like SusaninTexas said - it's easy to want to declutter when the house is messy. When it's tidy and all the clutter is hidden away, it gets harder.
It's just amazing to me how I am able to look at things in a completely new light after a few rounds of decluttering. The things I truly value are a lot fewer and far between!
I even found that I am selling a lot of items so I can replace them with less stuff but higher quality items that I truly love. It feels wonderful!
Certain times of year get me on the ball again. November, for one--my favorite Christmas present to myself is an even more uncluttered house.
I no longer have a car or a mobile phone which lots of folk think is a little eccentric nowadays. I thought for a long time that being without a car would be temporary but the longer I've been without it, the more I think I don't want one now. Same with the phone. I broke mine and decided to wait a while before replacing it and didn't miss it at all. It makes me feel freer. Fewer distractions; fewer temptations to go shopping; I'm more connected to the local community and small independent shops instead of out of town supermarkets.
TV might be next to go. Sometimes I feel a bit like the TV is somewhat cluttery (?). It isn't useful, it isn't beautiful, it is a timewaster, shows I really want to watch can be viewed online.
I've been thinking a lot about how beginning the decluttering process has changed my relationship with my possessions. I've realised that to a large extent, I defined myself by the things I owned. That possessing something allowed me to acquire that identity somehow. I'm trying to move away from that mindset towards defining myself by what I DO rather than OWN. I'm not sure that a TV really fits with that view of my self and my goals. Living TV-free does make a pretty big values statement though and places one out of step with most of the population. I'd be interested in what people think of that.
In summary, decluttering for me has been about assessing whether an object is in line with my values and the sort of life I want to lead. If it does not, then I consider it clutter and it should go. If it does, then it is not clutter. As my vision for my life evolves slowly over time, more items may fall under the clutter category.
I love my TV. I know it sounds shallow, and maybe a bit sad, but I really love it. I love watching TV on DVD. I unwind at night by watching my shows.
That being said, if it isn't something that you enjoy or find important, then go for it! We shouldn't have to hold on to things because it is "the norm". I would get rid of cable if my husband didn't love it so much. I could do without all those channels. Most of what I watch are TV shows that I have on DVD or ones that I borrow from the library.
dechmont: it's definitely the norm to have a tv, but if you don't want one or watch it, why have one? More power to ya! (I do really enjoy watching tv myself, I like lots of channels!)
I do wonder how you get around without a car, though. How do you get to work, dr appointments, kids sporting/school activities? It sounds as though you have grocery shopping near you, but how about the climate where you live? Is it conducive to year-round walking? It's sure be swell not to have to have a car, to live in a close-knit community where everything is near by-I'd love it. Not so in my case, I'd be stranded without a car. It's rainy, wet or snowy 6 months out of the year and we'd be pretty hungry if it was up to me to walk the 5 miles to the grocery!
The cell phone I can understand, I lived without one for many years when my kids were little. But funny how when I got one, I felt like I couldn't live without it! I have received more than my fair share of emergency, rush to the hospital calls (kids and aging parents) when I was out and away from a home phone, so it stays, but it's not a necessity.
How do I get around without a car ? I get the free city bus to work (20 mins); I walk to the doctors (5 minutes); I don't have kids yet but when we do, they will get the school bus, same as I did when I was little.
I live in the UK. If it's beyond walking distance, then I get the bus or train. Sometimes, for example, coming home late at night, I'll get a cab. Still a lot cheaper and simpler than keeping a car. No insurance documents, no road tax, no service history and appointments, no tools, no garage, no parking fees.
Good for you. If I lived where I could walk or bike, I'd consider being without a car, or at least having only one for our family. :) But, I live in Alaska where the whether is not conducive to non-vehicular transportation, and there is NO public transport (nor any taxis in my area), so a car is a necessity. As for a cell phone - I have one, but usually only use it while traveling. I never use up my minutes, and I have only the basic plan. My husband does not have one.
TV now, I'd have trouble giving up. I don't watch a ton, but I do watch some every day. Watching on the computer is not an option due to our limited bandwidth (which goes along with the cost of broadband in Alaska). I wish our library had more TV shows on DVD in their collection. I know I can get them with Netflix, but so far we've resisted getting a subscription.
What we have never subscribed to in the Alaskan lifestyle is having "toys" - like snowmachines, ATV's, big boats (or more than one boat!), a cabin or two for hunting/fishin, or big 4 wheel drive trucks. We have 2 4-wheel drive vehicles but they're small 4 cylinder ones for everyday use, not off-road travel. We have 2 canoes (and a 3hp motor), and a bicycle. We also don't have any debt as compared to our neighbors who have some or all of the above. :)
We have a car, but we mostly don't use it - if you plan your life around the neighborhood, bike trails, and bus system the car ends up being more of a pain than it's worth, because most of the places you want to go have terrible parking or the way you know to get there doens't work for a car.
It's just an adjustment.
My kid can't ride the school bus right now because of behavioral problems, so we've been driving when the weather's bad this fall. It really sucks. If I'd known he'd be bad on the bus we would have leaned more toward a closer school. But right now I'm about to pick him up from school in the bike trailer because it's nice and sunny.
We don't have a car, and for the most part, we don't need one. We both live and work downtown (20-minute walk to work), have a grocery store 15 mins' walk away (needing to walk to and from it also means we're less likely to stock up on food needlessly), and for everything else there's public transit (which is quite good where I live) and taxis.
The only times I wish we had a car are:
- taking the cats to the vet (can't take pets on the bus around here, and it takes longer to get a pet-friendly cab)
- going on longer trips (day trips, road trips etc)
- carrying heavy things for longer than 15 mins (mainly when taking a batch of donations to the Salvation Army)
We're currently debating signing up for a car-sharing service -- a company provides a fleet of cars, you sign up, reserve a car whenever you need it, and pay a usage fee. Makes much more sense for us than owning a car and paying for parking, gas, maintenance etc for the 1-2 times a month we'd use it.
Anita: that car-sharing service sounds like an interesting option. Sounds like your system of walking to work keeps you in shape. Do you shop for food every day (such as on the way home from work)?.
We live at the outskirts of a small city with very limited and very slooooow bus service. A bus ride lasting an hour can be covered in 15 minutes with a car, so I am hanging onto my car. It is 1.5 miles to the nearest bus-stop from our apartment. No park-and-ride car lots here, either.
I have a car, but I try to minimise using it when possible. I get the train to uni, it's 2 miles by scooter from school to the station but I like the journey and it keeps me fitter. Today I drove to uni and found it really stressful negotiating the traffic, plus ended up parking a 10 minute walk away so only slightly shorter door to door, so will stick to the train where possible. I get lots of stuff delivered, and I should get the supermarket stuff delivered if I could get back into internet shopping with my supermarket. However, I tend to pop in on my way to somewhere else so we don't make extra trips to the supermarket, plus it's usually once a fortnight or so. We have a good bus into town, but it's really expensive for me and the kids to go on it any further, more than a taxi! So we drive to after-school activities out of walking distance. Our neighbourhood isn't bad for buses, but because we live on the edge of 3 counties and there are several different train routes, actually some places which are only 5 miles away and take 10 minutes in the car can take an hour and a half by bus or train, it's ridiculous! So I need my car to visit friends who live in those places. Dechmont is right about the car being cluttery though, I spend a lot of time having to sort out insurance, servicing, MOTs, tyres, that sort of thing. I bet it would add up to a couple of days a year total, plus the cost.
I have a friend who has no telly, and she spends her life fighting with the TV licensing authority, who refuse to believe she doesn't have one! We have 2, one is pretty much just for DVDs, and the other one my dh has the remote so I barely watch it. I quite like watching it once a week or so, if there's a program we all like, but I'm usually studying or reading the kids stories in the evenings. If we got rid of it I probably wouldn't notice. I'm not sure it would be due to a particular lifestyle choice though, there are lots of fab telly programs out there. Occasionally if my dh is out the kids and I will snuggle up and watch wall to wall documentaries :) I wouldn't have a social life without a mobile though, my main mode of communication with friends is by text. They're mostly other busy mums, and kids are always making a racket in the background, so talking on the phone is a nightmare! Plus I would probably never talk to my dh :) I think though if you don't use something and it's taking up physical or mental space, then ditch it.
I agree on the layering, I think it applies particularly to books :)
@dechmont
"Living TV-free does make a pretty big values statement though and places one out of step with most of the population. I'd be interested in what people think of that."
The only reason I keep my TV is to watch movies on Blu-Ray and DVD. I do watch some TV shows, but hardly ever when they are "live" on TV. Most of them I can view online at a later time (i.e. when it suits me and not the broadcaster), and the others I can usually buy, rent or borrow on DVD/Blu-Ray within a few months/years.
People do find it strange that I don't watch "normal" TV, but I tend to ignore the comments and look forward to the day when on-demand media consumption is more common than today. So, in my opinion, if you don't watch "normal" TV and don't use the device for other things, why keep it?
@pkilmain
"[...] I live in Alaska where the whether is not conducive to non-vehicular transportation, [...]"
Really? I live in Norway, and once the temperature creeps below -20 C, or the snow stacks up more than 15-20 cm, our feet are pretty much the only reliable forms of transportation around here...
I live in a city and get by just fine with my feet and public transportation. If it was up to me, private driving (i.e. not buses, taxis, delivery trucks, etc.) would be banned inside the city. I don't see any reason why people would need cars if public transportation was available and decent (i.e. free or very cheap).
Sometimes I might need a car for a longer trip outside the city, but in those rare occasions one can be borrowed from a friend or even rented.
There is a recent "Does TV Clutter Your Life?" thread you might want to look at. I also considered the being out of cultural loop issue. No answer for that one.
But there's an interesting new option I just learned about: Google TV using a flat Sony TV found at best buy and sony which you can use for both internet and tv, simultaneously! Excited!
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