I have become obsessed with decluttering. I'm starting to wonder if it's some obscure high that makes me want to keep getting rid of stuff. I know that it isn't a good idea to spend too much time focusing on "stuff" at all, but it feels so good to get unwanted things out of my house that I can't stop!
Does anyone else feel this way?
I hear you, and I don't think it's all that healthy, unfortunately.
For me, it's not just the high of getting rid of stuff, but also the low of not having anything to get rid of. Sometimes I'd look around a room and go "ugh, why do I have so much STUFF?"... but then I can't see anything I can actually get rid of, which makes me feel a little overwhelmed.
The reason I think it's not a good thing (other than obsession in general being less than healthy), is that the whole point of decluttering is to free us from worrying about "stuff", whereas it looks like the more we unclutter, the more focused we become on the stuff.
Maybe taking a break from uncluttering every once in a while is a good thing?
@Anita - you're absolutely right. I do the same thing. I look around, think I have too much stuff but then realize there isn't anything to get rid of.
And you're so right about the obsession, in general, being unhealthy. Like you said, the whole point of decluttering is to free us from stuff in the first place. The obsessing is just making me focus on it more!
After this last batch of ebay items ends I am going to take a break for awhile!
I feel that once the obvious decluttering has occurred...then it becomes an exercise in EVALUATION and ORGANIZATION. I am one of those who believe that all our things are not clutter, the clutter is clutter, and that which is not clutter should be organized in some fashion or it quickly can become clutter. So hang in there.
Ann, I think I am in the evaluation stage. Maybe that's a big part of it - I am over-evaluating what I need. With each round of decluttering I am becoming more critical of what I have left!
I could see myself getting to this point too, even though I'm just starting out. But I'm a big organizer, so I think/hope I'll begin to organize more at that time. I agree with Ann - not everything is clutter. Sure I haven't sewn in 8 weeks - but I'm not about to go throw out all my material. (Such as my DH wishes I would! LOL) I know I'll get to projects at some point. So, my hobby room really is 25% decluttering and 75% organzing. While other rooms, like my bedroom are 99% decluttering!
I'd like to think if I get to where you are music, I'll start in on some deep cleaning, repairing, or remodeling.
i really know what you mean. but- i don´t care as long as i feel GOOD! and the more i get rid of, the better i feel. i know there is a point where i have to stop and i exactely know this point: it´s my comfort, the easy way to live. for example: i thought about towels. a lot! how many do i need... and i made theoretic plans, and i tried them out etc. now i know: we are two people but we need 9 towels. there are people who need two for two, but i need nine to change them, to take them to my sportsclub etc. and i wash once a week. that´s it. and that´s the point where i stop, when decluttering for the sake of decluttering would bring more stress to my life. if i had to use the towels more often than i like it or if i had to wash twice a week because i don´t have enough... that´s where i find my point to stop. i want to live my life without being stressed by too many or too less (-> not enough) possessions.
BevAnn - I definitely want to start in on some deep cleaning, like you said. There is so much less to clean around at this point and I feel like I could do a really good job now!
Mimi - I agree wholeheartedly with you! Decluttering for the sake of decluttering definitely would add more stress to my life. Like you said, some people are comfortable with a few items. For example, some minimalists have 5 pairs of socks. I have upwards from 25 pairs because I like knowing that if I needed to change them I have plenty until I do laundry again. (Like you, my husband and I do laundry once a week). Once my comfort is effected then I know I have gone too far. That is such a good reminder to me - I probably won't unclutter things I really need, that make my life easier. Maybe right now I am still weeding through the rubbish!
Very interesting points from everyone!
My current theory (tested only on myself thus far) is that doing a big physical overhaul (i.e. the first big uncluttering sweep of the entire house) gave me a high that's urging me to continue; however, the rest of my stuff isn't amenable to the same kind of effort, since now I'm down to tweaking, organizing and other minutiae that are much less satisfying to my inner 5yr old that demands instant gratification. So all at once I have the nagging feeling that my uncluttering is not done, and the twang of laziness/procrastination that tells me what I have left to do is much less easy and less gratifying, which makes a perfect storm for frustration and obsession. Anyone else?
Anita - another great point. I agree that the decluttering that is left is the less gratifying portion. For me it is a lot of CDs, DVDs, jewelry, and itsy bitsy stuff. Some of the items are things that I am unsure of. Maybe this is a big part of why I obsess! I can't declutter it one big sweep and therefore spend way too much time thinking about what to do with it!
Yeah, we all like the visual rewards of a big clutter removal. When I first cleared out my craft room, I kept stopping as I walked past it and turning on the light, just to look in for a minute. But, yes, at some point, you have to acknowledge that you need what you have left, or you've tipped over into obsessive compulsive spartanism.
music, have you offered to help any of your friends? When I was done with the major work at my place, I'd alternate the fussy bits with helping sort with my friends. It's equally enjoyable, and gives you that same feeling of accomplishment, even if it's not your stuff! (I guess if you take that far enough, you could end up as a professional organizer.)
Yes, I think I can be obsessed about de-cluttering! In the big scheme of things, I don't think it hurts anything, unless I un-clutter
something I find out later that my partner wanted to hang on to! She has been watching my "to go" piles more closely.
I'm a little obsessed. What saves me is a certain reluctant cohabitor; also that I am still thoroughly in love with a lot of my stuff (books, beads, furnishings, art, cats) and don't want to live without it.
I am shooting for having the same quality of life, with the same useful and beautiful things, in a smaller space in the future - so, not the same *quantity* of useful/beautiful things.
Thus my keep-it tests have gotten more stringent and I have become more willing to push said reluctant cohabitor about the things that are neither useful nor beautiful.
Yes, sharing a home with another human adds quite a challenging dimension of possibility...personal preferences as to keep-it tests, usefulness, beauty...sometimes I stop and read posts where someone has gone ultra-minimal in a super-small space. That solution may sound appealing to me at times, but I don't foresee myself doing that, really.
After putting away all the Christmas decorations that were getting on my nerves because of all the extra stuff everywhere, I have been on a decluttering, organization binge. Closets, drawers, cabinets, etc.
My neighbor just watched Peter Walsh's new show and wants to declutter. Maybe I need to help her instead of obsessing about my stuff!
i love having less and less stuff.
all the reasons *why* have been touched on already: the mental space, the beautiful physical space, easy to clean, the feeling of calm, the extra time....all of that.
also, i am finding that it is an interesting discipline thing.
and i really enjoy pondering the nature of stuff and the nature of our relationships to it.
I have to keep reminding myself that decluttering is a means to a end and not a real "hobby." One of my biggest goals is a home that is easier to maintain and more pleasant to be in, and decluttering helps that. So do a lot of other things like organizing and finishing home projects that have been lingering.
jbeany - I like your "helping friends declutter" idea. I actually helped one friend over the summer and she asked me to help her again! I should really see if more of my friends would like me to guide them. I have one in mind that I can start with - she mentioned wanting to go through her closets so she may be interested in some help!
Wendy - I liked what you said about your partner looking more closely at the things leaving your home. My husband has been questioning what is leaving more than he used to. I don't ever get rid of anything that belongs to him but he must be curious to see what I can possibly have left to get rid of that is my own!
I love all of the stories and advice that all of you have been giving. It makes me feel less alone and also makes me realize that I probably won't declutter the important things. I feel better about that already!
I've know this for quite some time, but haven't been able to admit it to myself until recently; I need a comfortable amount of things around me all of which have a significance of some kind to me and they need to be organized neatly (and of course evaluated from time to time, as well). I'm nowhere near the comfortable amount yet, as there is too much clutter obscuring that serene place, but at least I know what it is not - another "cold" kitchen from a magazine. I need vibrance to thrive, in both colours, textures and sound, and the challenge is to find the balance, just like Mimi speaks of her towels. It cannot be a fast process though, because every single item will inevitably be scrutinized, and I hope to have as few regrets as possibly once I've reached a balanced state after the first round. After I tied this endeavour to thoughts and ideas on my health, I've been able to slowly let go of the "it has to happen now, all at once!". But it fills a lot :) I'm okay with it for now, though, and that's what matters to me.
Woops, some of my reply has mysteriously disappeared. It was about the specifics on obsession.
By it fills a lot, it's like an avalance that can't be stopped anymore. I think about it every day and I read this forum several times a day. I know I will slow down with that again, but for now it seems like a necessity to keep the flame alive. Plateaus will come, I'm sure. I tend to lean towards thinking that a certain level of obsession is inevitable, a necessity even, as this is something so life-changing. Everything I believed as far as earthly possessions goes is shaking to its core and that's not a small thing. It can be overwhelming, scary even, and then belief in the outcome is a must or I can't keep going. I need to know that the end of the tunnel is a good place, a light and warm place, where I can embrace what truly matters in life instead of being forced to focus on dust in the wrong places, heaps and mountains of stuff in my way. So yes, I'm a bit obsessed, because I tell myself what I need to hear and the energy to do so comes from filling my thoughts with this for now. It's a futile circle though, I realize while writing this, because after this round comes the next and the next. Enjoy the ride, my friends! :D
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