Archives for Humor
I can’t believe it! There she goes again! She’s tidied up and I can’t find anything! — Thomas Dolby
Things organized neatly is not me. While I appreciate looking at images of precisely organized spaces, I’ve discovered feeling ashamed of my workspace is detrimental to my work. My office is a living thing, not an exhibit. I’m a stacker. About a year ago, I abandoned the guilt I generated by not maintaining a white glove-ready workspace. In doing so, I’ve relieved some stress, became more productive, and realized that untidy and organized are not mutually exclusive.
The Tidal Wave
Every few months I would succumb to an urge to transform my home office into a museum exhibit. I spent hours arranging my office and finding a home for everything. I called my self a neat person. Neat people are highly organized and productive. They’re intellectual and competent. I am one of those people.
Within a week, the piles returned, as did the guilt. Clearly, I’m not one of those tidy, on-top-of-things people.
Evidence, Not Enemy
When I finish a day’s work, I look at my Mac’s desktop. Screenshots, photos, snippets of text, emails and so forth fill the screen, strewn here and there. Before I throw it all way, I consider the jumble. That’s the evidence of a day’s work.
So is the stuff in my office.
I pulled ideas or reference material from those books. The photos reminded me of something or someone I love (like my kitchen from my childhood home in Scranton). The papers hold all sorts of goodies — contracts I’ve signed, drawings from the kids, numbers I’ve called, arrangements I’ve made.
This is the evidence of my work. Some would put the book on a shelf after reading. I’d rather simply put it down and start writing. I like the photos where they are so I can reference them anytime. I work hard, and this stuff is a part of the result.
Untidy and Organized
There’s a very important distinction to make here. Namely, the huge difference between processed and unprocessed stacks. A random pile of stuff that contains items you can’t even identify is not acceptable. I’m not condoning an amorphous heap of who-knows-what, nor should your office become a huge inbox.
Everything in my office has been processed and assigned an appropriate home. That is to say, I look at every item and ask myself:
- What is it? A task? A project? Trash or reference material?
- What must be done? File it? Toss it? Add to a project or task list?
- Where does it live? A folder, cabinet, desk, etc?
Once I’ve determined the answer to each question, I act accordingly. That way, everything is where it ought to be. Even if its home is a small pile on the corner of my desk.
How precisely organized should I be? Enough to pass a white glove test? No. That’s not going to happen, and imposing that ideal on myself is actually counter-productive. So, I stay organized enough to achieve my goals. Today, I achieve what I’m after, stacks and all. I’m okay with it. I have things I love around me, like photos, drawings and Disney Vinylmations. It’s working and, more importantly, I am.
When I was younger, my grandmother’s house was kept like a museum. It was gorgeous and sterile. My office is a working space. Stuff gets done, and dust is raised. Detritus is strewn about. Like a potter who goes home with clay on his jeans, I get messy when I work.
But the result is beautiful.
A reader asked if we had ever seen the weight loss books Eat This, Not That and wondered if we might be able to create something similar for uncluttering:
Of course, uncluttering solutions are as varied as there are people, but I have to imagine there’d be a variety of things that would work for everyone.
We often do these types of suggestions in our Unitasker Wednesday posts when we encourage people to own multitaskers instead of 9,000 bizarre unitaskers that lack real utility. And, we thought it might be fun to come up with ideas on this theme for all areas of the home and office. Obviously, as reader Shalin mentioned in the suggesting email, these dichotomous scenarios won’t work for everyone, but they can still be entertaining on this first full day of summer (or winter, if you’re in the southern hemisphere):
- Have a Netflix subscription, not an enormous collection of DVDs.
- Own a sharp chef’s knife and take a knife skills class, not a Slap Chop, Watermelon Knife, Pineapple Slicer, Mayo Knife, Bananza Banana Slicer, the banana shaped Banana Slicer, Garlic Zoom, etc.
- Own a dynamicFRAME, not a giant mess of your kid’s artwork on the front of your refrigerator.
- Own a filing cabinet, not a cardboard box where you throw important papers.
- Use a daily calendar, not a series of sticky notes stuck to the front of your computer monitor, bathroom mirror, or meeting reminders scribbled on the palm of your hand.
What fun additions would you make to this list? Share your Own This, Not That suggestions in the comments.
This video is more fun than instructional, but I felt compelled to share the amusement. If only my books had magical powers and organized without any work on my part! Enjoy this video from Crazedadman:
via the wonderful SwissMiss
The website Comics Alliance, as its name suggests, covers comic books and all things related to the comic book industry. Reader Haley called our attention to the site to check out the post “Super-Hero Hoarders. The 7 Biggest Pack-Rats In Comics.”
Art often mimics life, so it’s not surprising that fictional characters struggle with clutter the same as everyone else. I really liked #4, Rick Jones’ illustrated mess. From the article:
At first glance, it’s pretty easy to call Rick Jones out for hoarding super-hero contacts. Over the course of his existence in the Marvel Universe, he’s sidekicked for the Hulk, Captain Marvel, Captain America, ROM: Spaceknight and the entire Avengers team, and been singled out as the bearer of the Destiny Force, which was so complicated that even Curt and Chris won’t touch it.
In reality, though — or at least, in one reality — Rick’s a straight up legitimate hoarder: In the alternate universe of “Future Imperfect,” the Hulk ends up killing all of the other super-heroes and super-villains, leaving Rick to amass a pretty hefty collection of memorabilia
Check out the full article to learn who took the top spot.
A number of really cool things have moved across my desk this past week, but none of them are necessarily large enough for a post all their own. Enjoy exploring these uncluttering and organizing tidbits:
- Much like the Lifehacker Pack of free downloads for Windows that we linked to on June 3, we now can link to the “Lifehacker Pack for Mac: Our List of the Best Free Mac Downloads.”
- Lifehacker also had a great post about a creative way to display a collection in a small space.
- ThinkGeek featured a Universal Network Cable to make patching for rolled, crossover, straight-through, ATM/loopback, and T1 as simple as turning the dial on a single cord. The select-a-cable idea is uncluttering genius.
- SwissMiss’s photo gallery of the amazing use of space 505 square foot apartment literally made my jaw drop.
- Also on SwissMiss, a pretty cool storage stool and coat rack in the article “Cutter Stool and Wardrobe.”
- I may end up writing a full post on this next item, but since I have yet to install it, I don’t feel qualified enough to do more than share a link right now. The program Papers for the Mac allows users to manage files and create groups similar to the way iTunes works. I’ve been looking for a document manager exactly like this, and am really excited to give it a try.
- We all know about reusable grocery bags, but did you know you can get reusable produce bags, too? Amanda at Metrocurean introduced me to the Produce Stand Collection of vegetable bags.
- More suggestions for how to get rid of relationship clutter post-breakup from the wonderful D. Allison Lee.
- After the “The mess he made: A life-long slob decides it’s time to get organized” article ran in The Washington Post, there was a live online discussion with Mike Rosenwald and Randy Frost “Hoarding intervention: A life-long slob gets organized.”
- Finally, after our controversial post on Simplified Spelling earlier this month, a reader sent us a link to a really fun YouTube video of Ed Rondthaler (he’s 102 in this video). It’s a lighthearted critique of English spellings, but maybe not safe for work in one short spot mid-way through the video. Best to watch it at home.
I’m a big fan of furniture that multitasks. That’s why I’ve been (unsuccessfully) lobbying my wife to let me order this beautiful custom-made solid-wood entertainment center that will become my coffin once I no longer need an earthly place to kick back and watch Six Feet Under on DVD.
If my casket is going to cost a fortune, I might as well enjoy it while I’m still alive, right?
Note from Erin: No. No. No.
Except for when a kind neighbor drove me to the grocery store in his all-wheel drive station wagon on Monday, I haven’t left my house in 10 days. Since I declared February as Super Simple Month, I guess I should think of this time as Mother Nature’s way of helping me to keep to my plans. (We’ve received about 4′ of snow in the past two weeks.) But, unfortunately, being shut up in my house for so long has negatively affected my creativity. I haven’t been able to run (usually this is my time to be alone with my thoughts each day), and I’m finding nothing in my house inspiring right now.
Instead of reading about my cabin fever, I thought you might enjoy checking out some links that have more valuable insights into uncluttering, organizing, and simple living than I can produce right now. Trust me, this is what is best for all of us:
- “Diary of a Mad Hoarder: Uncluttering Your Life” by Betsy Lowther for the Washington Post Express
- “Downsizing: New-to-D.C. lawyer starts from scratch in small condo” about an amazing 600 sq ft condo by Jura Koncius for the Washington Post. (Be sure to check out the photo gallery.)
- “A Roomy 178 Square Feet” by Penelope Green for The New York Times
- “Cool ideas to streamline your home office” on CNN.com. Select Get Started to make the advice in the image interactive.
- “Is Lindsay Lohan a Celebrity Hoarder?” “Lindsay Lohan Gets Ready to Clean House!” and “Lindsay Lohan Cleans House.” A final video aired in the series showing before and after of Lindsay’s closet, but haven’t been able to find it yet. Anyone?
- “Waste Not” by Monica Ricci
- “Nina Garcia’s Shopping Tips” from Marie Claire magazine
- Finally, “How to organize cats” to put a smile on your face.
I had a good laugh at this sketch from this past weekend’s episode of Saturday Night Live, and I wanted to share the fun. Erin lost it at “Dirt!” and now I can’t stop chanting, “Pies! Pies! Pies!” And, we should definitely warn you, it’s probably not safe to watch at work because of the “testimonial” in the middle of the sketch.
First up, Naomi Seldin at The Times Union in Albany yesterday posted a new Clutter Game (pictured). Using your arrow keys, catch the “clutter in the donation box before it fills the house.” My high score is a lame 270 — when you need a quick break, see if you can beat me.
Up on deck next is a strip from the comic Basic Instructions. Scott Meyer’s “How to Accept an Unwanted Gift” is a new favorite.
Have you seen any fun clutter-related things recently? Share your cheerful discoveries in the comments.
I thought you might want a bit of P for Precious motivation to help with your filing:
Thanks to Cute Overload and photographer Mae for spreading this adorable image to the web. Enjoy this soul melting gift as a belated-birthday present to you. Awwwww!
A year or two ago when Hannah Montana became the favorite topic among my young cousins, I decided to watch four or five of the episodes on the Disney channel to figure out what they were discussing. I’m not really sure I’ll ever understand the appeal of the show, but I did learn about Hannah Montana’s closet. (The link goes to a video of her closet. I couldn’t bring myself to embed the video.)
Hannah Montana has an enormous closet with library stacks filled with shoes, belts, and purses, and rotating racks of dresses, tops, and sequined pants. While a fashionista might see the closet and start salivating, my first thought was, “How could I better organize this space?”
A Closet Carousel would definitely be an improvement over the spinning metal racks in Hannah’s wardrobe. Getting rid of all of the clothes she no longer wears would be another good idea (but my assumption is that since she leads a double life, she has more clothing needs than most). And, Simple Division Garment Organizers wouldn’t hurt in such a large collection of clothes.
The pièce de résistance, however, would be a digital wardrobe database with images and descriptions of all of her clothing and accessories. This way, Hannah might be able to pick out what she wants to wear before setting foot into her closet for an evening of party hopping or whatever it is secret rock stars do with their time.
If she has a Mac, she might enjoy the Dress Assistant closet organizing software:
If she is a Windows user, she might like the Victoria Clothes Organizer:
Or, if she wants a custom solution, I’m sure she could whip one up in Access without too much trouble.
For those of us not living the secret rock star life, any and all of these ideas would be overkill. However, it’s still a fun mental exercise. How would you organize a fashionista’s closet?
At Unclutterer, we love touting the benefits of multi-use items. However, there are times when maybe product designers go too far with their melding of purposes. Gizmodo recently identified “10 Gadgets With Too Many Stupid Features,” and we wanted to share a little of their humor with you.
My favorite misguided objects:
Spinning rims with LCD television screens. I definitely think these are a car accident in the making.
The cell phone razor. Just imagine if you accidentally turn on the razor when you intend to answer a call. Oh! Ow! My lip!
Okay, maybe the “Mug-Mouse” is fun, but how would you ever wash it??
Click on the first picture in the series, the “Gun-Knife” to start scrolling through the slideshow. Then, click on the right side of each image to move between the gadgets.
If you are a bit sad because you didn’t get your most sought after holiday gift, then you’re probably not alone. There is some hope for those of you who didn’t receive that new designer bag and that new LCD television. BagTV could fill two voids with one incredibly ridiculous product.
Yes, two products in one amazing combination. It isn’t really a unitasker so I couldn’t include it in that category. BagTV will have to stand alone in all its glory. It is a multi-tasking product of excess.
From the product description:
Bagtv is a totally new concept in bag design, combining bespoke luxury bags with high tech electronic equipment.
The first in a range of new products, is a beautifully crafted ladies hand-bag, which comes in a range of cool colours, leathers, and fabrics, integrated with a high quality 7in TVscreen combining, DVD, and Mpeg player.
The screen sits behind a protective transparent shield and enables the owner to literally watch Films/Videos either on DVD or downloaded to the bag.
The system comes with full connectivity for use with computers or digital cameras through USB port and SD card slot, allowing the playing of scrolling photos on the bag.
Use on the move, on the way to and from work, for holidays, on trains or in the car.
Use at night in bars, and clubs to show off your latest photos, or favourite videos.
The smart light weight battery system, allows the player to play up to 2.5 hours, movies, video, photos before re-charging.
It comes equipped with its own re-charger unit for use with the mains or in car, together audio/video cables for connectivity with TV .
All in all, bagtv is the latest fashion statement, and doubles as a really useful bit of kit for the ladies to rival their boys toys!
Sorry, gentlemen, this item appears to be just for the ladies — you’ll have to use your small, longer battery life iPhone as an alternative.
(via Red Ferret)
Photo courtesy BagTV.
The boxes are available in a set of six or individually through the Onion’s online store. While these are obviously fake products, they aren’t that far out of the realm of some of the unitaskers we have featured here over the past year and a half.
Use your head and stay organized! The Visorganizer is a revolutionary carrying case for everything you need to make it through your busy day whether you’re a pro golfer, a retired ship builder, a club DJ, or a busy mom on the go. And it clips on the front of your favorite hat. Pack it with up to 7 lbs. If it has a visor, it needs a Visorganizer!
I wonder how long it will take someone to actually invent a saleable Visorganizer?
It’s the holiday season, and we all need a little smile. Similar to our Unitasker Wednesday posts, we don’t want you to buy these items. We simply want you to have fun reading about all the awful gifts of clutter you wouldn’t really want to give this year.
Stumped on what to buy your favorite co-worker or loved one? Consider giving the gift of clutter!
Small Kitchen Appliances
Your mother-in-law hates coffee? No matter. Buy her an espresso maker anyway. Get the deluxe version equipped with steamer and grinder. It’ll take up lots of counter space and you can use it when you visit. Heck, buy her two!
If you really want to yank the chain of the minimalist in your life, buy knick knack gifts. These small shelf stuffers fit any budget. You can get a $1 replica of the Statue of Liberty. Inexpensive gifts not your style? Consider the pricey gem-studded Hello Kitty figurine for $163,000.00. (image from boredbored.com)
Arcade-Style Video Games
Who needs Rock Band when you can go retro and deliver a full size, 300-pound Ms. Pac-man to an eager child or adult? Cram it into the living room of a tiny studio appartment for easy entertainment. A fun and educational experience on the history of video games can be had by all.
Who says you can’t impose your own artistic tastes onto others? Let’s face it, some people in your life need your artful guidance. At big box stores, garage sales, or art galleries, look for bizarre sculptures, abstract paintings, or anything that would leave the recipient asking: “What is it?”
A Pile of Boulders
For your suburbia-dwelling friends, don’t forget the garden. Call your local rock quarry and have a truck dump off a pile of rocks on your friend’s driveway. They’ll have hours of fun trying to pick up the boulders, one-by-one, and finding the perfect garden spot for each to occupy.
Hard-to-Use Electronic Equipment
For the technically challenged on your list, give the gift of complex electronics that will end up tucked away on a garage shelf. Universal remotes that require setup on a computer and web access are an option. Challenge the recipient to sit with the manual until he or she figures out how to program it.
In his post Too many flower vases, Matt asked: “So what can I do with all of these vases?” There is no need to get rid of them when you can let them collect dust in a cabinet! Add to your friends and family members’ collections with a giant vase to obstruct the entrance through any front door.
Really, the possibilities are endless when it comes to lovely clutter gifts. Large, small, expensive, cheap — clutter gifts span the world over and can easily provide a lifetime of dust, maintenance, and storage fees for your most treasured friends.
What is the most outrageous clutter gift you’ve ever received? Let us know about it in the comments.