Unitasker Wednesday: Squirrel Underpants

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

Like most sane people, you are likely an advocate for Small Animal Decency. You feel offended by squirrels running in the wild, frolicking about in nature, who aren’t wearing pants.

Thankfully, you are not alone. Now YOU can put an end to animal indecency. You can clothe all the boy squirrels in your neighborhood in Squirrel Underpants:

And, all the female squirrels in Girl Squirrel Underpants:

But please, whatever you do, try not to encourage the underpant-clad squirrels to post selfies online. If they must post a picture, at least insist they are fully clothed (like this one or this one).

Thanks to our own Jacki Hollywood Brown for finding these two fabulous unitaskers.

14 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: Squirrel Underpants”

  1. posted by Kramii on

    Oh, my! Look away, look away! That girl squirrel is topless! Well, I certainly didn’t expect squirrel pron on Unclutterer…

  2. Profile photo of DavidCaolo

    posted by DavidCaolo on

    Oh my goodness.

  3. posted by Spadlo on

    We bought a pair years ago. It travels around on birthdays and during white elephants. The panties never clutter up one house for too long.
    Always gets a laugh even after years on the circuit.
    Cover fuzzy nutz and have a chuckle at the same time.

  4. posted by Rae on

    I have friends who have just about tamed the backyard squirrels. One is name Willy because, well, let’s just say he’s obviously a boy. They are going to get a kick out of this idiotic product!

  5. posted by Leanne on

    This gave me a great big laugh this morning – Thank you!

    Has anyone else clicked over to the Amazon page for this item? The customer reviews are hilarious.

  6. posted by Anna on

    At first glance those acorns look like tongues…long extended tongues…Miley Cyrus, move over.

  7. posted by Sher on

    my 9 year old decided to spend his own money on something similar…”handerpants”
    they look like a cross between beggers gloves (fingerless) and boys underwear.
    he thinks they are the most hilarious thing ever :)
    he wore them to school for crazy dress up day!

  8. posted by WilliamB on

    Oh dear. And I love the Kramii’s crack about squirrel pron.

    But I can’t help but notice the rampant sexism: there are “normal” underpants and “girl” underpants. Message? Girl = abormal.

  9. posted by Rosanna on

    These are yet more products which I have met in the Archie McPhee catalog (http://mcphee.com/shop/). This is the go-to catalog for bacon shaped bandages, Librarian Action Figures, Llama Salt and Pepper Shakers, and Macaroni & Cheese Air Freshener

  10. Profile photo of Erin Doland

    posted by Erin Doland on

    @WilliamB — I’m pretty sure it’s the exact same squirrel, they just flipped the image in photoshop … so … can it be sexist if it’s the same squirrel? My guess is they’re both girl squirrels?

  11. posted by Courtney Wilson on

    I love the comment about posting selfies. Made my morning!

  12. posted by Christine on

    Hysterical! The best part- my parents have a pet squirrel! I sent this to my dad for a laugh, I don’t think they would really buy this. I could be wrong though! Maybe Lucky will have his own present under the Christmas tree this year? ;)

  13. posted by WilliamB on

    @Erin – the sexism is in the naming rather than in the model. There are “underpants,” no modifier; they are the default, normal option. Also for sale are “girl underpants,” with modifier; they are the second, unusual option. So the message is the boy choice is the normal, default choice while the girl choice is the exception, the unusual choice.

  14. posted by chs on

    Do these even qualify as Unitaskers? They seem more like Un-taskers or Zerotaskers (though I suppose providing a good chuckle is worth something).

Comments are closed.