Unitasker Wednesday: Disposable Plane Sheets

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

I’m all in favor of hand washing and taking reasonable measures to reduce the spread of unwanted germs. However, there is a point where reasonable precaution slips into unnecessary obsession and has diminishing returns. This week’s unitasker selection is definitely in the unnecessary obsession category (at least for healthy individuals with functioning immune systems) — Disposable Plane Sheets:

These disposable (yes, disposable, it is part of the official product name) sheets are made for standard coach airline seats and cost around $20 a set when you include shipping. They are marketed to the general population, to protect everyone from the germs left behind by the people who previously sat on a plane seat. Sure, scientific researchers have found that germs don’t live more than a few minutes on fabric surfaces and that the arm rests (which this product doesn’t cover) are a larger (though still small) danger of germ transmission than an airline seat. And if you’re afraid of bedbugs or lice, nothing is stopping those critters from jumping off your neighbor’s seat and onto you just because you have a Disposable Plane Sheet. But, pffft, whatever, science.

If you’re unnecessarily afraid of germs on airline seats, just think of all the additional product possibilities you could buy — Subway sheets! Bus sheets! Train sheets! Passenger seat in your friend’s car sheets! Chair at the DMV sheets! Park bench sheets! Carousel horse sheets! Chair in the waiting room at your doctor’s office sheets!

Go broke buying seat sheets so your pants never again touch the same place as someone else’s pants!! Ahhhhhhh!

Thanks to Canadian reader N for directing us to this week’s unitasker selection.

Bonus: Reader CK found an incredibly amusing item in the potential food-product unitasker category — Powerful Yogurt for Men. We’re not convinced food can be a unitasker, but if it can, this one would certainly qualify. Too funny.

17 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: Disposable Plane Sheets”

  1. posted by Marie on

    Reminds me of Sheldon Cooper’s bus pants. Maybe he can use these when he takes a plane.

  2. Avatar of

    posted by Laetitia in Australia on

    0% fat yoghurt? (Gotta see that.) And they claim they aren’t marketing to women?

  3. posted by Kathy on

    Good heavens. I’d be less concerned about the person who previously sat in my seat, and more concerned about the people who are sitting around me right now, breathing into the same air that I’m breathing! Wow.

  4. posted by Nana on

    I’m thinking of a disposable paper thingie that could be attached to one’s shoulders (think cape). Leave the aircraft, peal off one layer and you’re ready to sit in a taxi (or subway), peal off the next layer at your destination (if you trust your hosts’ furniture).

    Perhaps in a variety of colors / patterns / lengths.

    Anyone want to Kickstarter this with me?

  5. posted by melt on

    Man’s yoghurt, and the push for probiotics had me wondering…

    Why don’t they just call it “Boy germs?”

  6. posted by LP on

    “The first yogurt for men!” Isn’t all yogurt for men???

  7. posted by Pammyfay on

    Nana — right on! Like disposable hazmat suits.

    and … should “Powerful Yogurt for Men” be packaged in a camo pattern?

  8. posted by guest on

    Airplane air has been found to be cleaner than your average office air.
    Then again, individualizing airplane seats might be fun, just for the looks!

  9. posted by Beste on

    Loved it Nana – can we call it an “onion” outfit. Another unitasker is being created right here :)

  10. posted by Anna on

    This could do wonders for the fashion industry when camo and leopard eventually go out of style. New colors each season! Why are we not being shown Disposable Plane Seats in emerald green, the current Color of the Year? Are we expected to travel with Disposable Plane Sheets whose colors are passe? What can the manufacturer be thinking of?

  11. posted by Sherri on

    I was going to try that yogurt, but alas, I am a woman. Curse this vagina of mine!

  12. posted by bandicoot on

    i spotted a company in new zealand a year or two ago, marketing yoghurt to men.
    and with a sense of humour too!
    i actually took a photo of one of the tubs of yoghurt, because the instructions were comical: you are a man, this is your yoghurt. now grab a spoon or a shovel and dig in.
    http://www.mammothsupply.co.nz/

  13. posted by Ben on

    I never realised I needed yoghurt to “Find my inner abs”.

  14. posted by ej on

    makes sense… most lice from international flights…

  15. posted by Mary on

    The only point I can see to this is for those with peanut allergies. I could see this as one more step to protecting themselves. My twelve year old who has a peanut allergy. Fortunately we were allowed to board early and I was able to wipe down the arm rests, tray etc. with Clorox wipes.

  16. posted by EngineerMom on

    everything’s pretty much been said about the sheets…

    “Powerful Yogurt”?

    …it’s fat-free Greek yogurt. That stuff’s available by the QUART around here, and in a nice, non-gender-specific blue-and-white generic carton. And if that’s still not manly enough for you, you can always put it in a metal container before going to the gym.

  17. posted by lee on

    Honestly on my last plane journey I wish I had one of these . I sat down and about an 1/2 hour after take off I felt a little damp– oh no who peed in the seat before I sat down.!!
    That was so disgusting and even though I was able to change seats I couldnt change my pants- ended up with half the loo’s paper towels stuffed down my pants as a shield.
    Of course they would have to be waterproof and disposable and you would need X ray eyes to know which seats were wet and would need one of these.

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