Comments on: Four ways to manage work-life challenges

By: Leslie

Leslie — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 15:29:59 +0000

I went into business for myself in the 90s. It’s unfortunate that I did not have the support of family members (who didn’t live at home). My mother, for example, felt that because I wasn’t working for someone else, in an office building and earning a paycheck with benefits, I was playing around (to this day, when people ask her what I do for a living, she still says, “something on the internet”, despite me explaining it and showing her physical copies of my work). That said, she would call or stop by whenever she wanted, because I was home playing around, after all. Despite setting “office hours” and asking/pleading for cooperation, fell on deaf ears. When I added caller ID to my landline, I was able to ignore family/personal calls during my “client time”, which helped me concentrate and get done what I needed to get done.

Cell phones were only then shifting from big and clunky to small and manageable and texting was relatively new. That said, it did afford me the ability to leave my office to do family/personal activities as I could forward the landline to my cell. But I was tethered to the phone every time it beeped.

It took me 6 years to agree to (try to) take one Saturday off. I was sweating the entire time and it was only about 4 hours. I survived it. Tried it again, survived. Slowly I became more comfortable with taking time off.

Today, with smart phone, skype, wifi everywhere, apps, you name it, my work life is much easier. I can set ringtones and prioritize calls. In a pinch, I can review a file on my phone or nook without having to go to my office. My life is easier and I do spend more time with family, but it took a long time for me to accept that it was ok not to be a fixture in my office.

The downside is I still have family who doesn’t accept that what I do IS my job because I can do it from my car, their livingroom, my office or the beach.

By: Michaela

Michaela — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 14:16:02 +0000

This is something I struggle with everyday right now. I have been self employed for the last 13 years, and I am naturally a hard worker.

One thing not mentioned here which I have learned in the last year or so is saying NO more often. I spent a couple years struggling due to real estate doing a nosedive. In the last year my work has drastically picked up. Its scary and unpredictable (especially being the main breadwinner of the family) but I am beginning to realize I can’t do it all. I just called a few really GOOD clients and informed them I could not do their work because I am so busy – it is what it is! I am contemplating quitting one client because of the mental hassle it is giving me (and I most likely will, but I want to be professional about it). I have also had to assert that I am going on vacation coming up and will NOT be available. And to add to the icing, I am thinking of employing a relative to be essentially my part time assistant. Its a tough gig, but I want to spend time with my family and its a sacrifice you have to be willing to make. You can’t do it all, so just say NO more often. Ask for help. Give yourself a break, and let the guilt go. Life it too short.

By: purpleBee

purpleBee — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 14:11:29 +0000

Sorry, that post was meant to end with…

If tge answer is No then why are you talking to clients during your grandmother’s funeral service, or at your brother’s wedding, or after 6pm?

By: purpleBee

purpleBee — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 14:08:47 +0000

People who cannot balance their home and business lives need, in my opinion, to ask themselves one question – if I was incapacitated by illness or injury for 5 days, or in some way unable to use my phone etc, would my business collapse into ruin?

If the answer is yes, then your business model is flawed. 48 hour viriuses, extreme weather knocking out power, airport closures, children injuring themselves and requiring your undivided attention, earthquakes, death of a family member, public holidays and religious events, family or frind’s wedding, your birthday, birth of children, Life, etc, etc, all happen or could happen.

If your business can’t function without a word out of you for 48 hours for any reason then you don’t have a viable business.

If the answer is -no, it would survive and be OK. Then why in the world are you talking to clients

By: Jeannette

Jeannette — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 19:02:50 +0000

Meant to say:
Every day, men, women and children give the love and support that is needed for these high-achievers to do the work. Sadly, way too many of these folks are NOT present for these folks. Now, that is a waste of human “capital.”

By: Jeannette

Jeannette — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 19:01:17 +0000

Sadly, many people find more security and “comfort” in their work lives than their personal relationships. They also, especially if it is their own business, have more control as in a sense of control over process and outcome. Something you do not have with a person and a relationship (well, if it’s a healthy, mature one).

Relationships require focus, attention and time. And their is no guarantee of the “result.” This is scary for a lot of people and thus it is easier to place your time, focus and attention on work, where there is often a (perceived) better “payback” for that investment.

Humans are unpredictable, uncontrollable and creatures of both habit and change. They’re emotional, frustrating, sometimes demanding and all sorts of things that a lot of men/women simply don’t want to deal with (but are loathe to admit if they are even that self-aware).

For those of us who have “been there, done that” with work dominating our lives and who have paid the price and then learned that no matter what you do, real-life relationships trump work. A lot of folks are so focused on fame or greed or even, in rare cases, doing good that they do not have any need or desire to create, maintain and grow human relationships. And that is just sad.

Our lives as human beings are about far more than work, no matter how meaningful. It’s about people. Given our society, it’s no wonder we live in a world of high-achievers on the work front but total failures on the relationship front.

Every day, men, women and children give the love and support that is needed for these high-achievers to do the work. Sadly, way too many of these folks are present for these folks. Now, that is a waste of human “capital.”