All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!
Fondue is one of those things that when you eat it you feel like it’s the ’70s and you’re in France. Ooh la la! Oui! Right on! It’s a communal experience. It’s a chance to wield a sharp fork in close proximity to your friends and family. It’s one of the rare times you can stuff your face with gobs of saturated fat in the form of hot cheese and chocolate and no one judges you harshly because you’re sharing a fancy meal.
However, this week’s unitasker selection takes all of those awesome things about fondue and destroys them. Introducing the Personal Fondue Mugs:
Nothing about these mugs is a throwback to the ’70s or France. Mugs with candles in them screams, “21st century America!” It also screams, “Danger! Danger! Watch out for the tipsy lady walking around the party with molten hot cheese and an open flame!”
These mugs kill the communal, shared experience of fondue. They even kill the awesome long sharp fork and the ability to wield them near those you love. These mugs ruin fondue fun.
I also can’t come up with another situation in which you could use these. You certainly can’t drink out of any container with an open flame. I imagine doing so would drip candle wax (and eventually the whole candle) right down the front of your shirt — which, let’s all agree, is just patently unsafe. And, for $15 and another $5 in shipping and handling, you only get 2 mugs. To use these at a dinner party, you would want more than 2, and end up spending a good chunk of change to be able to offer a mug to each of your guests.
… and now I want fondue and to find a way to work, “can you dig it,” into a conversation … I shake my fist at you, unitasker fondue mugs!