Unitasker Wednesday: YOU write the commentary
All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!
To mix things up, this week we’re going to have a little fun. I’ll present the unitasker selection, and then you all write the commentary in the comments section. Next week, I’ll announce my favorite at the end of the Unitasker Wednesday post on the 16th and send a signed copy of my book — Unclutter Your Life in One Week — to that person. Yes, people outside the U.S. can participate. And, please, only one submission per person. Have your submissions in by Monday, November 14, to have your commentary considered.
Introducing the Obol, the Never Soggy Cereal Bowl:
Now, be creative! I am so excited to read your comments and have dozens upon dozens of laughs.
73 comments posted
Posted by Another Deb - 11/09/2011
For some reason this reminds me of an old Saturday Night Live Phil Hartman sketch where he plays the Anal- Retentive Chef.
Posted by kersti - 11/09/2011
Sorry – as a hater of soggy cereal, I wanna know where I can get one!
Posted by Franny - 11/09/2011
I’m with Kersti — and I’m sure that I’d find other uses for it too!
Posted by mememe - 11/09/2011
Looks like a yin and yang bowl to me…
Posted by cath - 11/09/2011
too much like a baby’s top & tail bowl to me which is something I would NOT want to eat my cereal out of!
Posted by Mary Jane Harris - 11/09/2011
This is a great concept that lends itself to a big range of product possibilities — the perfect storm for consumer spending. Don’t we also need a slightly different version that would be perfect for mashed potatoes and gravy and a version for rice and beans, etc?
Posted by Chris Shaughness - 11/09/2011
It’s not just for cereal! Tired of runny mashed potatoes? Place your cubed pototoes on one side and milk on the other. Or having trouble with mac and cheese? Pasta on one side, cheese sauce on the other! Oh the possibilities are endless for you creative cooks!
Posted by STL Mom - 11/09/2011
For the extreme minimalist, who lives alone and insists on owning only one bowl. And then chooses this one because…..okay, let me think about this some more!
Posted by Marianne - 11/09/2011
I would buy one, two maybe. Except the name sounded vaguely familiar, so I googled it. Would you want to eat out of something that was named after the Greek coins buried with the dead to secure passage to the afterlife? Or maybe named after a Swedish company involved in a major fraud scandal? (Source Wikipedia). But maybe that is what it’s all about: to swindle you out of your coins. Or, to have you suffocate on too hard (not enough soggy) cereal to get you into the afterlife sooner!
But seriously: I want to buy one in green, my favorite color. I’d still need a different extra spoon to shovel the cereal into the milk though. Otherwise I’d get the cereal wet with the milk left on the spoon after having it in the milk and in my mouth. That would be a real problem. So does it come with a spoon or two?
Off to Amazon to order, until I notice a very important reason not to buy it: it only comes in a righthanded version, and I am lefthanded. It is a double unitasker. Not only is it a milk and cereal bowl, it is a righthanded milk and cereal bowl. Sorry folks!
Posted by Sara Anne - 11/09/2011
yeah, i’m with some of the others here. it’s a definite unitasker–no doubt about it!, but…I totally want one. the cereal gets milk on it without the sogginess? perfect!
also, if you want to see lots of unitaskers get on the website Pinterest. I love it, but sometimes the things that are pinned by others I immediately think “ohhhh unitasker wednesdays!”
Posted by Carol - 11/09/2011
Great for those of us who don’t like our food to touch each other. Who wants their veggies contaminated by gravy or au jus?!
Posted by Rebecca - 11/09/2011
I don’t think this is a unitasker. It would be great for chili and crackers.
Posted by Charlotte - 11/09/2011
While this is an important innovation for the food separation league, I believe it could benefit from a cereal slide with a little time-release sluice gate, to allow the discerning user to decide how much cereal to auto add, for the perfectly arid mouthful.
Next to launch will be a coffee mug with time-release sections for milk and sugar, so as to maintain the purity of the coffee in each perfect sip.
Truly, some people have too much time on their hands…
Posted by Gumnos - 11/09/2011
reminds me of our time in Perú where we had two cereal options: The first one was a corn-flake knock-off which you could pour milk on and come back a week later and they’d still be crunchy; the second, we joked, that if you held an eye-dropper of milk and dripped it on the rice-krispy knock-offs *as you put them in your mouth*, they’d already be disgustingly soggy.
Posted by Georgia - 11/09/2011
I think my parents own something very similar . . . for their cat. Food in one side, water in the other.
Posted by Rachel - 11/09/2011
Hmmm…it’s either a water-and-food bowl for the dog who hates clutter, or else it has something to do with putting one’s foot in one’s mouth. Maybe the idea is to put your breakfast in one part and soak your feet in the other? You have to be flexible to make this happen, even if you’re sitting on the floor. IF you’re that nimble, you’re probably also good at getting out of any trouble you cause yourself when you put your foot in it, so to speak.
Enough fun. TIme to resume decluttering the place where we live (if you can call this “living” amidst all the debris. but isn’t that the reason that all of us are here–to live with less junk and more happiness?!).
Posted by Rachel - 11/09/2011
I meant that last admonition for myself. Not trying to tell anyone else what to do!
Posted by Jen - 11/09/2011
Isn’t this basically the same thing as Pete’s chip and dip on Mad Men? Except you can’t trade it in for a rifle.
Posted by Brandon - 11/09/2011
Some like it hot, some like it cold
Some like it dry, some like it wet
Some like it crunchy, some like it soggy
Relationships are about sharing and caring. Nothing shows you care like responding to your companions cereal consumption preferences.
Obol allows you to boldly say “I accept your differences and am ready to share my life with you. Including my bowl of cereal… just dont get milk on my side!”
Obol is available in a limited edition heart shape for Valentines Day 2012. Pre-order yours today to ensure on time delivery.
Posted by Liz - 11/09/2011
Obviously, this bowl is engineered to prevent wasting milk. Whatever milk is left after you finish your cereal can be poured back into the jug.
Of course, you’d need a funnel. Are funnels unitaskers?
Posted by nwkuyk - 11/09/2011
Form and function together…with only a small tilt of the bowl. AND you can hang it on your wall as art when not in use.
Posted by Lianne - 11/09/2011
It seems to me that this would just cause the opposite problem. Some cereals need to absorb a little milk first, otherwise it’s TOO crunchy. You just can’t win! Except by eating your cereal really fast!
Posted by Kelly - 11/09/2011
Who says you can’t pour your cereal, step away awhile, and come back to find your cereal to still have that crunchy texture you so dream of?
With the Obol, you can do just that! You’ll get just the right ratio of milk and cereal! PLUS. . . it comes in multiple colors so that so one can steal your Obol!
Oh Obol….. why didn’t you come along sooner!?!!!
Posted by Debbie - 11/09/2011
I hate soggy cereal, but even so, I can’t imagine wanting this bowl unless I was a person who could only eat one bite in between doing fifty other tasks. Seriously, though – cereal doesn’t take that long to eat! Pour the milk, eat immediately, no sogginess! Unless someone’s having a heart attack, anything else can wait two minutes while you finish your (perfectly ordinary) bowlful.
Also, I can easily imagine that while dipping your spoon into the milk, some cereal is going to fall off, and unless you go through the extra effort to rescue it right away, it’s going to get – guess what? – soggy. As for other foods – God forbid your foods touch each other even the tiniest bit. And since when does a cereal bowl – a PLASTIC CEREAL BOWL, people – cost US$20??
The Obol: when extremely picky eaters who want to work harder at mealtime need the very plasticky best. Now! In six colors! (Incidentally, why are all the “warm” colors named after foods, but blue, green and white aren’t called “blueberry”, “celery” and “milk”?)
Posted by Mackenzie - 11/09/2011
If you don’t want your cereal to be soggy, why pour milk with it at all? Eat it dry. If that makes you thirsty, put the milk in a glass and take a sip now and then.
I’m not a fan of cutting the roof of my mouth on my food, so I’ll stick to making my cereal soggy and safe.
Posted by Me - 11/09/2011
Have you ever poured milk on your cereal and then instead of eating it right away you went to facebook and got distracted? Then you come back to your cereal and it’s soggy and ruined. All that waste!
Now with Obol, the never soggy cereal bowl, you can get distracted by social networks, catching up on blogs, texting friends and never have soggy cereal again!
Posted by Becky - 11/09/2011
Eating cereal is too easy for maintaining your healthy weight. Studies show, the longer a food takes to eat, the fewer calories you will consume. So when you have a craving for breakfast cereal, eat it from an Obol! You’ll spend so much time scooping and dipping, you’ll get tired of eating long before you’re full!
Posted by MissPrism - 11/09/2011
“OBOL! It’s TWO plastic bowls in ONE!*
*for the price of TEN”
I have a better idea: the SQUOON! The SQUOON handle contains a concealed tube plus a small pump controlled by an accelerometer. You fill your spoon with dry cereal, and SQUOON squirts milk onto it as the spoon is raised. The tube goes up the eater’s sleeve and connects to a milk reservior in a refrigerated backpack.
You don’t need an OBOL if you’ve got a SQUOON!
Posted by Mimi - 11/09/2011
pah, obol is for beginners…
what if you like to have the constituent parts of your muesli separated? dried friut, different cereals, milk, joghurt?! this http://www.gastrodirekt.net/pr.....283_lt.jpg is the solution… but: it seems to work works for dinners, too- no unitasker
Posted by Charlotte - 11/09/2011
What’s wrong with pouring the milk on the cereal, mixing it around, and dumping out the excess milk? I hate soggy cereal, and that’s how I do it. No need for a special bowl.
Posted by Tina - 11/09/2011
Reply to:
Charlotte – 11/09/2011
“pouring the milk on the cereal, mixing it around, and dumping out the excess milk”
That’s a pretty good idea, albeit a bit wasteful. I’m going to use a modified version of that in the future, pour on a bit at a time and mixing until everything is moist.
Posted by Tiara - 11/09/2011
I saw this at Brookstone the other day. The packaging had other uses for it. They all seemed pointless to me except maybe for the chips and salsa version. But there are tons of chips and dips bowls out there…that are a lot less expensive.
Posted by CM - 11/09/2011
Um. The SQUOON exists. Google “Boon squirt spoon.” (It’s for feeding babies, though.)
I actually do have a soggy-cereal problem because one of my kids invariably needs something immediately after I pour my milk. But if I were that worried about it, I could just keep my milk separate in… wait for it… a CUP.
Posted by Marisa Wikramanayake - 11/09/2011
Ok this is going to sound weird but as I looked at it I was reminded of a beauty pageant with the contestants ready to dive off the cereal bit into the water (the milk).
I think it’s because the design of it reminds me of a swimming pool with that sort of higher bit up for people to walk into the pool or dive in.
I don’t understand what’s wrong with eating cereal the normal way anyway.
Posted by Jasmine - 11/09/2011
But how will I ever get my milk to turn chocolaty?! It’s a conspiracy by those who hate chocolate-frosted sugar bombs and other such nutritious breakfast fare. Darn you granola lovers! *shakes fist*
Posted by Macky - 11/09/2011
I’d love to hate it, but I actually want it. Not so much for the cereal, but for all the chips with salsa that I could eat…there’s never enough room in other plates for the insane amounts of salsa I consume.
Posted by Ramona - 11/09/2011
One take on “pouring the milk on the cereal, mixing it around, and dumping out the excess milk” As I say this, realize I am eating my cereal at home; I pour, mix, and then DRINK the milk out of the bowl. No, I would not do this in public.
Now for my description of the OBOL:
Oh all OCD’ers who fear their cereal in their milk delight in the OBOL! Who knew it could be this simple! A unitasker you say? Well, OBOL could also function as a pet food and water bowl! Who wants to dirty two bowls to feed two children? We’re supposed to teach them to share, so sharing they will learn by eating their Spaghetti O’s from the OBOL, but with respective sides for better hygeine. Or what about a romantic meal with your sweetheart? It’s very touching to share a bowl for your date night meal using OBOL! Why by one, or two? Stock your household with OBOL’s usefulness! You won’t know how you had lived so long without it!
Posted by Alyosha - 11/09/2011
Introducing the Obol! For those who hate soggy cereal but don’t have the sense to:
1) Pour milk into a (normal, multipurpose) bowl
2) Take the cereal box to the table with the bowl of milk
3) Put a small shake of cereal in the bowl
4) Eat the cereal
5) Repeat steps 3 and 4 as necessary
Posted by Katherine - 11/09/2011
You know how you have to chase the last bite or two of cereal around the bowl, trying to capture all of it on your spoon? Now you can do that with every bite!
Posted by Susan - 11/09/2011
Aside from the uselessness of this product, I am struck by the question, why is it that in advertising pictures of cereal the milk always looks soooo white and thick that it makes me think of latex housepaint? Mmmmmm, mmmm good.
Posted by gene - 11/09/2011
People actually like this thing!? Serve me up an Obol of depression and sadness.
Posted by Georgia - 11/09/2011
@Susan
Having known someone who once worked in food photography, the milk looks that way because it’s usually glue.
Posted by jibryant - 11/09/2011
Do you enjoy playing with your food ? Think of the fun you’ll have dipping and dribbling, testing each and every spoonful for that satisfying “just right” crunchy texture that you love. Just say O boy to Obol, ” The cereal bowl that YOU control “
Posted by ETM - 11/09/2011
I love all the comments so far, some are hilarious. I actually like the idea of the product as well (I’m a hate soggy cereal person) but the price at $19.99 per “plastic” bowl – DARE TO DREAM!!!
Posted by Lee - 11/09/2011
Introducing the OBOL…not only does it separate your cereal from your milk, but it separates YOU from YOUR money!
Posted by LW - 11/09/2011
This is what I do every morning… I take a large, flat bowl and fill it with cereal. I fill a glass measuring cup with milk. I take both to the sofa and turn on the morning news. I pour a small amount of milk into the bowl and tilt the bowl so that only a small amount of cereal actually gets wet. I eat that cereal. Ahhhh. Love the crunch with the milk together. I repeat this until all my delicious cereal is consumed.
With the OBOL there will be no more tilting of the bowl. There will be no more measuring cup to wash. I can have my crunchy cereal and eat it too!!
Posted by Katrina - 11/09/2011
“I’m trying so hard to be vegan, but I just gotta have that milk there in case! Thanks to the OBOL!”
Posted by jen - 11/09/2011
Obol – Oh what a bowl! For the right handed OCD person (or pet) in your life. Perfect for earthquakes due to the non-slip material, great for chips and salsa, and made in the USA. Will unfortunately last forever as it’s manufactured out of “unbreakable polypropylene,” but as things go, will come back into style just in time for your children to think it’s cool and vintage.
Posted by Andrea - 11/09/2011
For someone (ahem,me) whose soggy cereal aversion knows no limit (inducing her -ahem, me again- to eat dry ceral followed by a glass of milk) it doesn’t look that bad. Except I thought it was I who had invented this… in my house is looks like a cereal box on my right and a glass on milk on my left… oh well, I should have registered this one.
Posted by L - 11/09/2011
Interesting. As a strict rule, I don’t eat or drink anything that urges me to eat fast. If I really liked store-bought cereal (which I don’t) I would consider getting one of these, or maybe emulating it by using two bowls.
Caption could be: For all binge-cereal-eaters, you have a solution!
Posted by Stefano - 11/10/2011
Do you struggle with eating cereal? How many times has someone called at the door or the phone rung JUST as you poured the milk over your cereal? Do you worry about your cereal getting soggy as you struggle to find the sleeves on your Snuggie (available separately)? Well, don’t hit your USB panic button just yet because at last, there’s the Obol!
Now you can eat your cereal without living in constant fear that the doorbell will ring, the Obol will keep your cereal dry – whatever life throws your way.
But wait! There’s more, this isn’t just for cereal…
Try it with mashed potatoes and gravy, soup and noodles, EVEN strawberries and cream!
The Obol…call now and get two for the special price of buy one get one free! (Terms and conditions apply, always seek advice from your doctor before keeping wet and dry foods separate).
Posted by Ruth - 11/10/2011
It’s like looking at Berlin after the wall went up…or Romeo and Juliet. Sad little cereal exiled from that lovely lake of milk. That little escape route on one end just doesn’t do it…these two aren’t lovers any more, they have to meet on supervised visits. Tear down that bowl! Make breakfast, not war!
Posted by Rachel S - 11/10/2011
This new patent-pending design offers a solution to a pesky problem troubling housholds nation-wide. Until now, the only ways to avoid the soggy cereal phenomenon were to eat all your cereal within the first few minutes, or to refrain from adding milk at all.
This is no longer the case, thanks to the Obol!
This bowl utilises sophisticated “plastic barrier” technology to keep the dry cereal separate from the wet milk, and the serene yin-yan-style design reflects the spiritual reconnection with the tranquility of breakfast-time that you are sure to experience when using this product.
A lowered barrier at one end of the “plastic barrier” allows for easy yet controlled transfer of dry cereal into the wet milk, to match the pace of your breakfast. As an added bonus, you can play the “chase the last bits of cereal around the bowl” game with every bite! (instructions included)
To be followed soon by the even more portable, pocket-sized “syringe-spoon”! (patent not-yet-even-pending)
Dip your “syringe-spoon” in the milk, and pull out the plunger to fill the syringe-style handle with exactly a spoonful of milk. Shake to remove excess drips (or wipe, if you’re even more obsessive than our projected typical customer base), then collect some cereal on the spoon.
When you choose to press the plunger depends on how you like your cereal. you can either plunge straight away, giving the milk a few extra seconds to soak in, or plunge as the spoon enters your mouth, giving your cereal maximum crunchiness with just the right amount of moisture from the milk. (Warning, if instructions are not followed closely regarding degree of openness of mouth at this point, splashing may occur)
Eating cereal has never been more straightforward and simple!
Posted by Maren - 11/10/2011
Don’t you think it’s unfair if YOU have all the fun? Now your breakfast can have its share!
Introducing OBOL, the super water park slide for your cereal!
Hours of fun for muesli and raisins as they queue to jump into the pool of milk and be lifted out by the spoon ride!
Posted by Herfinnur - 11/10/2011
Why they chose to show it with the kind of cereal that never gets soggy is beyond me.
At least it inspires you to do things differently:
OBOL
America has become the land of the weak. the public school system has failed. 83% of all students and adults do not have sufficient math-skills to calculate what sort of mortgage their income allows for.
Manuals and good-ish design and books and video-tutorials for every task have made us stop relying on our own mental capacities to get us through lifes minor adversities. Children in the America of today do not get beaten up by their teachers anymore, do not have to entertain themselves anymore, do not have to work for their food anymore. This lack of adversity has made them weak and unprepaired for life’s surprises.
This is why we at OBOL designed the OBOL Cereal Bowl. our goal is to provide people with products that make them stop and think.
It’s design will discombobulate you and encourage you to deviate from the logical course of action through impeding design! The human mind, after all, thrives on adversity and the true and tested but ultimately crude, old-fashioned, uninspired and all in all too easy and logical way of judging the amount of milk you need by poring it over the cereals until they are mostly covered is cleverly made inexecutable trough our impeding design.
Instead, spurred on by initial failure, you will be encouraged to solve the problem with math and independent research.
But wait, you didn’t really think those 20$ would get you a mere plastic cereal bowl and nothing else, did you?
Included in the price is a two year premium membership to the exclusive OBOL Community Forum where OBOL users post their experiences daily and advice each other. There is also a gallery with already tens of pictures in all colours and cereals and a cereal-to-milk chart maker, that allows you to design your very own snappy, large-size, multi-colour cereal-to-ratio chart based on empirical evidence, personal preference, and the water absorbing properties of different cereals.
Then post it to Facebook or print it out for hanging up in the kitchen next to your measuring cup; handy and decorative!
OBOL: Because Resistance is Fertile!
Posted by Martin - 11/10/2011
Eat like a horse, drink like a baby. Wouhou!
Posted by Jenna - 11/10/2011
Obol: Because milk is just TOO pushy
Posted by another Liz - 11/10/2011
Don’t like soggy dry cereal? Switch to oatmeal! It’s better for you than most dry cereals.
ofcourse I suppose you could put your raisins or whatever in one side and…
re: left handed bowl-try turning it 1/2 way around
Posted by DandHRoberts - 11/10/2011
This looks more like a Milk park for cereal. All the cereal looks like its waiting in line to go down the fun slide into the milk pool. “Milk Park, fun for all best by dates. Bring the family today!”
Posted by Elaine - 11/10/2011
I am already the butt of many jokes since I eat dry cereal from a bowl and drink a glass of milk… but I don’t think the Obol will really help my situation.
Posted by Sheila - 11/11/2011
For all of my 67 years, I’ve suffered the slings and arrows of outrageous soggy cereal. It just never occurred to me to improve the situation. I am SOOOOO excited after seeing the Obol. It has inspired me to think out of the box, or bowl, as one would have it. I can use ALL of my bowls, yet still have crunchy cereal. I can pour some milk into ANY ONE of my OWN less than $19.99 bowls, then shake my cereal into the bowl a little at a time, eating each portion BEFORE IT GETS A CHANCE TO BLOAT!
Posted by lady brett - 11/11/2011
Is soggy cereal throwing your life off balance?
I used to be just like you. I knew that cereal and milk are not opposing forces, but when I put them in a single bowl together they became muddled, soggy; it was impossible to find the correct balance between them. I tried putting them in two separate bowls, but they could not complement each other properly with such a divide.
Now, i have perfect cereal balance, thanks to the yin-yang-inspired Obol! Obol allows my milk and cereal to interact as part of a greater whole, yet remain separate and perfect, individually. I like to think of each spoonful of cereal as that little dot of yin in the milky white yang.
For a mere $19.99*, you too can bring balance to the breakfast table! Don’t hesitate; call now for breakfast perfection. You deserve it.
*Plus shipping and handling. Obol not intended for use with other food products. Life balance not guaranteed.
Posted by L.L. - 11/11/2011
**This bowl is kitty approved**
Ever turn around from toasting toast or juicing juice to find your cat pawing cereal aside in a frantic attempt to steal the milk while you’re busy? Make it easy for the poor kitty and buy this bowl! Then, kitty can easily down the milk without getting pesky cereal bits in his whiskers.
Posted by Sally - 11/12/2011
Hate soggy cereal, but hate the constant ridicule you face for being the weirdo with two separate bowls in front of you at the breakfast table more?
Introducing the Obol, a life changing gadget that makes you appear to be a somewhat normal, well adjusted person that is capable of eating their cereal from a single bowl (albeit a weird looking one). Simply fill up one side with cereal, the other with milk, and then use the built in slide to send just a few morsels of cereal cascading into the pool of milk below. It’s as easy as eating cereal out of a bowl!
The Obol is also great for those who like to eat cookies while driving, but find it too cumbersome to take both hands off the wheel to hold the cookie and the glass of milk for dunking. Simply fill one side of the Obol with milk, the other side with cookies, balance it on your lap and there you have it. A fully functional, one handed cookie dunking station!
How you were able to function in normal society before discovering this amazing product is a complete mystery to the makers of the Obol. Don’t forget that Obol also makes a great gift for other cereal challenged people in your life!
Obol, making breakfast better one weird shaped bowl at a time.
Posted by Aeon J. Skoble - 11/12/2011
Neal Stephenson nods approvingly…
Posted by Ed - 11/12/2011
That snap, crackle and pop is more than the pleasant sound of your breakfast — it’s the relentless ticking of your cereal’s sogginess timer. Tick, tick, POP! Tick, tick, POP!
If you’re tired of wolfing down your meal before its epic taste turns to epic fail, then we have the bowl for you.
We call it the “Obol” – because “Tidy-bol” was already taken.
Posted by J.P. - 11/12/2011
Chicago, 1982.
It was cold, and the wind rattled the panes in our poorly-sealed windows, the draft chilling me as I watched cartoons on the floor of the one-room apartment that was all my mother could afford. Mom sat in what passed for our dining room and ate her morning bowl of cereal. Her coughing startled me, but not as much as the silence that followed it, and the terror in her eyes. She was choking on her cereal. I ran to her and asked what was wrong, but she could only throw herself against our counter in an attempt to dislodge the chunks of toasted oat now lodged in her trachea. “Mom!” I cried out, but it was in vain–she slipped into unconsciousness, followed by the icy grip of death.
Foster homes couldn’t hold me. I made my way across the country, and eventually across Europe and Asia seeking someone, anyone, who would help me exact my revenge. Years of study and discipline made my body strong and my will stronger.
Cereal took my mother from me and I thought there was no punishment for it that would cause it to suffer the way it deserved. That’s when I discovered the Obol.
Now, each morning, I fill my Obol with milk, then slowly, oh so slowly, pour the cereal into the adjacent compartment. I want it to know whats coming. Drowning? Too good for cereal. Annihilation by mastication? Over too fast. No, the cereal must wait, sitting in its compartment, anticipating the suffering to come. It watches a few of its friends as they’re scraped into the milk, chills as they begin to succumb to sogginess. But before they go limp they’re snatched from the chilly white sea. Is it their salvation? No, only a brief respite before plunging into a much darker abyss–the hollow of my mouth, where they are ground to a paste before being swallowed.
The cereal sees its friends’ demise, and knows that it will soon meet the same horrific end, but thanks to the Obol, it can only tremble in silent terror at the fate that awaits it.
Thank you, Obol, for helping me finally give my mother’s killer the retribution it so richly deserves.
Posted by Glo - 11/13/2011
Milk this cereal killer for all you can get!
Posted by Candace - 11/14/2011
Wow, this reminded me of my dad. Every morning without fail he would eat a bowl of grape nuts and a bowl of cheerios. He hated soggy cereal, so he would use a large, shallow bowl, pour the cereal in, and then pile it up on one side of the bowl. He would then tip the bowl up so the cereal was on the high side and fill the low side with milk. Using his spoon, he would scoop some cereal from the high side then dip it in the milk on the low side and eat, repeating until the cereal was gone. As a minimalist and an engineer, I don’t think he would have had too high of an opinion about this product…
Posted by Alex - 11/14/2011
Crunchy cereal is a basic human right that we all deserve, yet are too often denied. If you’re like most people in this work-a-day world, you’re incredibly busy. Planning ahead 5 minutes so that you pour your milk on the cereal just as you’re going to eat it… who has the time? Who wants that much organization in their life? If there an app for that? I think not.
Fortunately, there is a solution on the horizon. Scientists at CIRL (the Cerial Integrity Research Laboratory in Urbana, IL) are working to structurally reinforce the integrity of the common toasted grains we enjoy every day, by spraying on a barely noticable coating of a nano-polymerized superdense plastic-like substance that will eliminate all porous surfaces on any breakfast cereal product – and which only has a 45% chance of being carcinogenic! Results are promising; scientists estimate an in-home application solution will be available by the holiday season of 2015.
For those who simply can’t wait that long, there’s Obol, a futuristic blend of wet storage and dry storage in a yin-and-yang-style arrangement. Originally meant to separate matter and antimatter at the CERN supercollider, an entrepreneurial physicist realized the ultimate potential of keeping apart two other volatile substances… milk and cereal. Bring them together under your own terms! Accept the subjugation of the man no longer! I can think of no better, more expensive, way to keep your breakfast in pefect harmony and homeostasis for the nearly five minutes it will take to eat it.
Posted by Steph - 11/14/2011
Expensive dog dish? Two-kinds-of-pickles pickle dish? No, it’s a thousand time more impractical than that! Although you could achieve the same effect by adding a little bit of milk to your cereal at a time, this fussy alternative allows you to take your cereal out for a swim in the deep white sea. It’s perfect for those leisurely mornings before work, when you have all of the time in the world to chase your cereal, one flake at a time, around your bowl. For the more compulsive consumer, it also functions well as a divided dinner plate, making it easy to keep your peas from touching your potatoes.
Posted by Wendy - 11/15/2011
Initially, I will admit that I was curious about the “obol”. I mean, it looks relatively jazzy, nice colors, but after closer inspection, it is a bowl with a divider. Literally. A $19.99 plus shipping bowl with a divider. I get that no one wants soggy cereal, but come on. Get a ziplock and add your cereal a bit at a time if you must. I checked out Amazon an found the selling point to be to swoop and scoop your cereal. Isn’t that a throw back from learning to tie your shoes? Or was it loop, swoop, pull? I digress. My other thought is on the name. Obol? Do you pronounce it obol as in oval? Or obol as in Oh-bowl? I’m hoping the previous as the last sounds like a shout out to the porcelain throne after a long night with Captain Morgan or Johnny Walker. At any rate, the obol would be an “oh no” for me.
Posted by bryan - 11/17/2011
Your desk is organized, check! Your car is organized, check! Your sock drawer is organized, double check! Now, your cereal can be organized, –what?!
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