Unitasker Wednesday: The Vacu Vin Egg Pillow

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

This is a first: Today’s unitasker is so outrageously mind-boggling I don’t even know what it does. As a result, I’m at a complete loss for what to write about it. Instead of providing witty banter, I’ll simply show you The Vacu Vin Egg Pillow:

Are they bean bags? Air-filled cushions? Is the egg sleeping, is that why it needs a pillow? Do eggs sleep? Do eggs have to “rest” after you cook them? Do you cook with these pillows? Do you put raw eggs or hard boiled eggs on them? Are they heat resistant? Do you use them in your refrigerator? Do you need a dozen? Why would someone need these? I DON’T UNDERSTAND!

Thanks to all the wonderful readers who sent in this item for us to consider.

49 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: The Vacu Vin Egg Pillow”

  1. posted by Erin on

    “Keeps eggs from rolling around or off the table”
    “Eggs sit comfortably”

    I had no idea I was so cruelly causing discomfort to my eggs in my inferior efforts to keep them from rolling off the table (who fills a table with loose eggs?) by fencing them in with whatever random objects were handy at the time :/

  2. posted by Markus on

    Well, egg cups are unitaskers, and if I understand this correctly, these are just a differently designed egg cup.
    Better looking than most other egg cups imho.

    (And *much* nicer than the ugly hen-formed egg cups my ex-wife incisted on…)

  3. posted by Michael M. on

    WTF? These can’t be considered akin to an egg cup, can they?

    I have a couple egg cups because I like soft-boiled eggs for breakfast and they’re the only really easy way to eat them. They’re basically unitaskers, but they’re small and I could put other stuff in them if I needed to.

    But, I’m with you on these pillows. This has to be a joke.

    Vacu-Vin also makes this little thing:
    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obi.....tterer-20/

  4. posted by Anita on

    You just blew my mind. Until now, it had never occurred to me that I can use a plate, bowl, or egg cup to keep my eggs in place, so my dining room was an absolute MESS because of eggs constantly rolling off the table and shattering on the floor. But now that I know the Egg Pillow exists, my world makes sense once gain.

    This would also be perfect for my egg altar. The awesomeness of eggs must be worshipped, and eggs must feel properly revered by being placed on little colour-coordinated cushions.

  5. posted by Ben_Voigt on

    My guess would have been that these are just supposed to be stylish egg cups.

  6. posted by Cath on

    Do they make a little TV to put in front of them while they are sitting there? If we’re going to make them this comfortable, they may as well come up with a Vacu Vin Malibu Egg House.

  7. posted by JyB on

    They are just novelty egg cups. They are machine washable :) I don’t know if I want to wash my laundry along egg covered egg pillows :)

    http://www.vacuvin.nl/Egg_Pill.....9_269.html

    Their web site is full of unitaskers (banana guard, melon slicer, … you name it)

  8. posted by Momma Yen on

    @Cath ROFL!!!

  9. posted by MamaCat on

    ROFL!!!

    But seriously, my eggs tell me that they are most uncomfortable and need little pillows to rest on. My dog prefers that they continue rolling off the table, however.

  10. Avatar of

    posted by happymonkey on

    According to Amazon, there are only 9 left, so order yours soon!!!

  11. posted by MamaCat on

    I just took a look at the Vacu Vin website and it is like a carnival of unitaskers. They deserve some kind of Medal of Honor. The fruit tools are almost breathtaking in their absurdity … the Kiwi Guard, the Strawberry Huller, etc …

  12. Avatar of Erin Doland

    posted by Erin Doland on

    They can’t be egg cups, right? I mean, the purpose of the egg cup is to hold the soft boiled egg still so gooey goodness doesn’t pour out of the egg shell. I don’t know how these would prevent that from happening. Wouldn’t your soft boiled egg just tip right over and spill egg goo on the pillow??

    I continue to be sooooooo confused! :)

  13. posted by priest's wife on

    They’re too loose to be egg cups…

  14. posted by missdona on

    It’s a resting place for a boiled egg, not an egg cup

    from the website

    “Vacu Vin Egg Pillows bring colour to your breakfast table! Your boiled eggs can lay comfortably on their coloured pillows waiting to be consumed. After use, the Egg Pillows can be washed in the washing machine.

    Holds your egg in place
    Fun and easy to use
    Washing machine safe “

  15. posted by Letitia (the Netherlands) on

    It is a fun stylish eggcup. The Dutch description clearly states that (it flirts with the gigantic amount of different pillows, large beanbags and inflatables that are “Hot” in interior design here in the Netherlands).

    It is from a Dutch brand that specializes in novelty design kitchen and home products. Yes many are stupid but also many win international design prizes. And no I do not have any personal or business connection with the company. I just agree that all eggcups are unitaskers (except when you use a shotglass, bagel or mini measuring cup for your soft boiled egg).

  16. posted by Amanda on

    You know what this would be good for? Those high school projects where you have to carry around an egg for a month and pretend it’s your baby (if you never had to do this, it’s a test where you have an object you are supposed to care for as if it were a child and document everything you do with it in order to learn what it’s like to be a parent, or something to that effect). Keep the “baby” nice and cozy…

  17. posted by NoAlias on

    I was hoping there was wine involved. It _is_ vacu-VIN, right?

  18. posted by Mario on

    Warning, these ONLY work with chicken eggs. Tried it with caviar about three hours ago and I’m still cleaning up the mess.

  19. posted by Jen on

    @Amanda – LOL! I had to do that project in junior high and I totally failed and broke my egg. For what it’s worth, 20 years later I now have a 5 year old son who, to date, is healthy and remains in one piece. I have managed not to break a live human but could not keep an egg intact for one week. This pillow could have helped.

    I can’t imagine what else it could be used for. I think watching TV with your fake egg child is the best one anyone’s come up with so far.

  20. posted by J.P. on

    I couldn’t help it…this product needed a review. Now it has one.

    Is it too much, do you think?

  21. posted by Alix on

    @ J.P.: Genius!!!

  22. posted by Megan on

    Haha, followed the link to the Amazon page and decided to give the one customer review a quick read. Then I decided to share it in all its brilliance and glory:

    “Breakfast is the hardest meal of the day.

    The sun rising, baking the earth with its incessant, life-giving rays, serving only to remind me of the emptiness within. Before discovering Vacu Vin Egg Pillows, I was doubly plagued by this monstrosity of a meal. Previously, my eggs, sitting uncomfortably (I now know) on my kitchen table, were frequently overwhelmed by the ennui of this petit déjuner and would, to end their discomfort and find the only solace they could in this cold, dark world, roll off the table–plunging to a yolky demise.

    That, though, was before I discovered Vacu Vin Egg Pillows! Not only are they a bright, cheerful addition to my table, they are a ray of light into my formerly dark soul. Just seeing their vibrant colors each morning in my kitchen has added vim and vigor to my daily routine, which before seemed an endless cycle of birth, malaise, and death. Furthermore, my once-suicidal eggs now remain comfortably seated on their Vacu Vin Egg Pillows, seemingly delighted to be consumed in order to satiate my hunger.

    Don’t start the day with Sartre–get going in an egg-celent direction with Vacu Vin Egg Pillows!”

  23. posted by J.P. on

    Glad you appreciated it, Alix and Megan.

  24. posted by Karen Newbie on

    It would be really interesting to know if this item enjoys a spike in sales due to J.P.’s 5-star, tongue-in-cheek review and all of us clicking the “found it helpful” button on the Amazon site.

    When I first saw the picture, I thought it was a soft-sided/insulated container to take a hard-boiled egg to work or school. But that didn’t make sense, either, because if it’s soft-sided, the egg could get squished by the hard-sided beverage bottle in the average lunch box.

    Very bizarre Uni-tasker. Nice choice. I hope I never see one of these in real life.

  25. posted by Sue on

    So THAT’S what a “coddled egg” looks like!

    LOL!!

  26. posted by Elizabeth Figueredo on

    The user review on the amazon page is super hilarious. Not sure if you’ve read it already, but if you haven’t, you should!

  27. posted by Elizabeth Figueredo on

    …I see I should have read ALL the comments before I posted one.

  28. posted by CM on

    I don’t know, I thing it would make a great bean bag chair in the Barbie dream house – especially the pink one!

  29. posted by Linda on

    I too had to follow the link….this is too incredible! “Brings a decorative flare to the table” For What?

  30. posted by organizingwithe on

    This makes the banana slicer look like a must have accessory for the kitchen!

    Next I’m seeing one of the home shows doing an entire segment on how to store this unitasker. A Vacu Vin rack maybe – possibly out of pvc pipe of maybe mdf?

  31. posted by jodi on

    Amanda, many schools have moved away from using eggs-as-babies in an effort to reduce egg cruelty. :-) In the last ten years, I have seen only computerized babies. They have a satalite link and transmit data about their care to the teachers computer for grading. The ones I have seen are fancy enough they actually have specific cries if you hold the baby/bottle at the wrong angle when feeding. There is also a button you have to push when the baby is wet/poo and needs a new diaper to indicate you met that need as well. Some kids were having to hire babysitters during tests even.

    As far as I can tell, the biggest thing the computer babies accomplish is super effective abstanince persuasion. The high school boys are especially fun to watch with their little bundles of joy!

  32. posted by Bri H. on

    I love the review that was left for this on the amazon site. It was hilarious. This is definitely a great example of a pointless item.

  33. posted by jodi on

    Might this be the life-changing, life-saving unitasker that brings Pepitto back?? :-)

  34. posted by Carol on

    Apparently they’re designed to keep your egg from ROLLING around the table. It’s too early in my morning to add a witty come-back; everyone, please carry on the torch!

  35. posted by Heidi Poe on

    Sounds like someone accidentally bought way too many tiny pillow things and just made up this egg pillow stuff to get rid of ‘em all ;P

  36. posted by Katie Alender on

    Who are these people that just leave eggs sitting around? What about plates? Is there a whole group of breakfasters who just set their food directly on the table? Waffles need pillows, too!

    That being said, I have a little strawberry huller (not this brand–mine is much cooler and predator-like), and it is a pretty amazing little contraption. And not a unitasker, as you could also use it to remove a small triangle of flesh from an enemy’s body.

  37. posted by jkm on

    I’m also from The Netherlands, home of (amongst many more useful things) the egg-pillow. This company ONLY produces ridiculous unitaskers. Even their first, and most successful product, the Vacuum Wine Saver, which probably does what it promises, is a silly thing for sad people who don’t have anyone around to help finish a bottle of wine in one sitting.
    Also check out http://www.vacuvin.com/PET_Bot.....3_267.html

  38. posted by Em on

    @Mario – ROFL

  39. posted by Joanne on

    I thought the review explained it beautifully!

  40. posted by BetsyK on

    Nice review, JP. Great post, Erin!

  41. posted by Cal on

    I would’ve guessed they’re intended to keep eggs from rolling around your counter. Not that you actually need something like this when a bowl would do.

  42. posted by Jan Horwood on

    Haha, ROFL! What a ridiculous unitasker. I really liked the idea of beanbag chairs for Barbies. Awesome! They’d make good pillows for hockey pucks too.

  43. posted by constance on

    Wow, ridiculous. Your readers are very funny too. I would never buy this, but here is one egg unitasker I would consider buying..seriously. http://www.egg-skelter.co.uk/

  44. posted by Liz on

    I’ll pass on these thanks. But you can have my grapefruit knife when you pry it from my cold, dead hands!

  45. posted by Jenni on

    Almost everything made by Vacu Vin is a unitasker, but these are uniquely ridiculous.

    That said, I love love LOVE my cheese grater from them. The grater is built into the wall of a cup, which the cheese collects in. I marked common measurements onto the wall of the cup, so cooking with fresh grated cheese is easy.

  46. posted by Mel on

    “Your boiled eggs can lay comfortably on their coloured pillows waiting to be consumed.” This one really got to me! My eggs need comfort whilst they wait to be consumed?? If my eggs are to be CONSUMED then what comfort is a pillow? Really. Absurd.

  47. posted by Emma on

    This post particularly made me laugh because it’s the first unitasker I’ve ever seen BEFORE it was posted here – in fact I have one (a gift I hasten to add). These are so useless its hard to describe: sure you can rest your boiled egg on it, but it then has to go in the wash, and those bright colours BLEEED, and who needs an eggy pillow sitting in their wash bag waiting for a bright wash?!

  48. posted by Lola on

    Of course they are for soft broiled eggs. It is quite obvious.

  49. posted by Lola on

    good point. How on earth would they get washed lol

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