Unitasker Wednesday: FingerPickin Cocktail Picks

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

Toothpicks are great little tools. You can soak them in water and then use them to hold bacon on filet mignon during grilling. You can use toothpicks to get poppy seeds out from between your teeth. You can stick them in cheese cubes, little sausages, olives, and other finger foods on appetizer trays during parties. You can poke one into a cake to determine if the cake is done baking. You can use a few toothpicks to create a small shim for an uneven table leg or to level a picture on the wall. Heck, you can do even more things with them, but you already know that. They’re also made from wood — a renewable and recyclable resource.

Although totally adorable, I don’t see as many uses for the colorful plastic FingerPickin Cocktail Picks as for the toothpick:

Except for spearing food to eat, the only other use I can conceive for the FingerPickin Cocktail Picks is accidentally poking out one’s eye with one. Obviously, this would have happened late in the evening, after much alcohol had been consumed, and only after a series of miniature sword fights failed to provide long-lasting entertainment.

Thanks to reader Em for introducing us to this cute little unitasker.

25 Comments for “Unitasker Wednesday: FingerPickin Cocktail Picks”

  1. posted by Bill on

    You know, I think those might be more useful as a multitasker than you’d think at first glance. You ever drop something somewhere, have it roll under something heavy or fall behind a place you can’t reach to grab it but maybe there’s enough space for just one finger? This would be perfect for those situations. Sure maybe you couldn’t use them to retrieve a screw or your keys, but you’ll never lose a hot dog under the refrigerator again.

  2. posted by lady brett on

    oh, i don’t know, i think they look a bit like itsy bitsy baseless champagne glasses. i think that is the idea that comes between the sword fights and the poking your eye out. that’s multitasking, right?

  3. posted by DawnF on

    So colorful! So cute! So…. ridiculous!!

  4. posted by priest's wife on

    I probably would just end up holding it between two fingers to get an appetizer- sticking my finger in it sounds a bit…weird

  5. posted by Hiit on

    So cute! Great post thank you for publishing it. Love your site

  6. posted by Jen on

    More plastic doo-dads being manufactured every day! What is the net effect of all this plastic on our planet one must ask!

  7. posted by Wendy on

    So, you eat off of it, and then use it AGAIN to get another bite off a communal plate??

  8. posted by Mario on

    Emailing from my doctors office… I’m here for my full yearly physical. I’m sitting on the wax paper that drapes the patient chair, naked except for my gown and shrinking pride. A nurse just stopped by and put a box of “Finker Pickin’s” on the table in front of me, next to a tube of gel and one white glove. Should I be worried?

  9. posted by Lesley on

    Well, I’ll be the one to defend them. I actually think these could be useful for my daughter in occupational therapy – spearing small items like marshmallows or olives could be good therapy for her cerebral ataxia.

  10. posted by DawnF on

    @Mario – You have to be the guy that wrote the Pippito stories! If you are, I miss him terribly. If you are not, please ignore this. LOL!

    Oh where for art thou, Little Pippito?

    Good luck with your… Finger Pickin’ examination! YIKES!! :)

  11. posted by momof3 on

    so, you pick up an item out of the bowl with this little gadget, bite it off the holder, and then stick your finger back into the bowl of items again….

    reminds me of the scene in Seinfeld where George is yelled at for double dipping….

    now, one pick per finger might be ok,,,,i know a good many people who put olives (bleck) onto each finger then eat them one by one….but, still, your germs are on the pick, then go back in the communal bowl of food/germs????

  12. posted by Mario on

    @Dawn Yes, it’s the same Mario. Maybe new adventures await little Pepitto on his way back to Monte Cappachino… ;)

  13. Avatar of Erin Doland

    posted by Erin Doland on

    @Mario — I, too, have missed little Pepitto!

  14. posted by Shalin on

    Wow…this is as weird as it is clever. Great post! :)
    –S

  15. posted by Shalin on

    Okay…now I’m wondering about this “Little Pepitto” stuff – got a link?

  16. posted by Mario on

    @Shalin

    I am a big fan of Unitasker Wednesdays (thanks Erin!!!) And for a while I’d write a little story that would incorporate the item of the week in some funny or ridiculous way that fit with the story. It culminated with a story I wrote and then followed up on with two more parts. Below are the links, search for the very long post by me, “Mario” and there you go.

    Note on the writing: I write them as ad-lib improv exercises. I don’t plan or think about them at all beforehand, I just get into a zone and boom, it pours out and I do the plot and twists all in real time as I write non stop until it’s done. Then I allow myself one quick spell check and hit send.

    The three links below, in order, that make up the story of Little Pepitto. Will there be more in the future? Who knows….

    http://unclutterer.com/2010/09/08/unitasker-wednesday-sunpentown-sd-1501-warm-air-dish-dryer/

    http://unclutterer.com/2010/09/15/unitasker-wednesday-1-lb-fat-model-replica/

    http://unclutterer.com/2010/09/22/unitasker-wednesday-snazzy-napper/

  17. posted by SarahM on

    @Mario – My personal favorite was the saga of the breading pan set :D

    http://unclutterer.com/2010/09/01/unitasker-wednesday-breading-pans/

  18. Avatar of

    posted by chacha1 on

    Mario = genius

  19. posted by Leonie on

    lol. this unitasker is funny.
    there’s always going to be something I never imagined possible. it is also nice that they do have a use other than intended that helps ie Lesley’s comment above.

    But most of all, I like the unitasker’s comments the most and it’s even better when it doesn’t set someone odd the deepend.

    It’s JUST ONE POST…about something trivial….

  20. posted by kylie on

    I think my favourite feature of a wooden toothpick is the ‘use once and discard’ feature!

    The people who made this obviously didn’t get the inter-departmental memo explaining that the ‘double-dipping rules’ apply to all items that enter/have entered the mouth even once – not just half eaten biscuits!

  21. posted by Richard on

    This was the sequence of my thoughts upon seeing this post:

    1) Wow, this is a total unitasker. Good call.
    2) Wait, doesn’t Fred make a bunch of silly products, largely for sale in novelty/toy stores and such? (They do: check out some of their other items in the “Also Viewed” section near the bottom of that product page.)
    3) Ah, so I guess the company is in on the joke, too.

    All in all: everybody wins!

    (Though I still wouldn’t recommend spending money on more than one or two of their wacky things.)

  22. posted by Shalin on

    @Mario – freaking creative writing rock star, you are :)

    Thanks soo much – Bravo!
    –S

  23. posted by Shanoboy on

    Alright, hands down the most ridiculous uni-tasker product I have seen yet!

  24. posted by jodi on

    Mario…I just spent the last 4 hours drifting between sleep and reading your unitasker stories. LOVE THEM!

    …IS there a unitasker to raise Pepitto from the dead? I am joining the “I hope so!” crowd!

  25. posted by gene on

    If you need “Sorry” replacement pieces, look no further.

    reference: http://www.target.com/p/Library-Sorry-Vintage-Book-Game/-/A-11247714

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