Comments on: Humor: What not to do

By: Melanie

Melanie — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 03:31:47 +0000

How about putting your lives in danger daily, living in a war zone away from your family? Happy Veteran’s Day- thanks to all who serve so we can whine about the trivial.

By: chacha1

chacha1 — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 17:41:29 +0000

This is all so sad. I wish all of you in these horrible situations a successful search for a better, new workplace!

The toilet marked “No Diving:” LOL, indeed.

By: Rob

Rob — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:25:57 +0000

I have one extra, and this one is a real thing at the office.

Have your boss or co-workers to set up their blackberry/smartphone to notify everyone (with sound) when a new e-mail is received…
*ping-ping* all day, nice!

By: Lynn

Lynn — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 00:33:21 +0000

oooh ooh! I have one!

Be sure to make really wretched coffee that nobody wants to drink and then always leave the pot on the burner all day so that burnt coffee stench permeates the whole building. Oh yeah.

By: Kris

Kris — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 23:24:10 +0000

Oooh, ooh, I have some!

Make sure that employees have no place to go to eat lunch or have impromptu meetings. Anything that encourages people to leave their desks is bad.

Never underestimate what small annoyances (a squeak in the ventilation system, an unreliable email server, power flickers and brownouts) can do to add to your work ambiance!

By: Tabatha

Tabatha — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:50:19 +0000

how about an annoying door bell that rings so loud everyone in the building can hear it, and usually no one but you answers it.

supervisors that don’t really care if you have gotten your break or not or have to get up several times to work during your break.

so much overtime that its impossible to have a life outside of work that doesn’t involve sleeping, eating, cleaning in your space time.

co-workers that throw a fit if you do anything that messes with their “routines” or sense of “power” when they don’t actually have any authority over you what so ever.

having you boss get all over you anytime you call late/sick about anything, anytime even if you have never called in before or its justified and you are given personal time for it.

By: Erin at Unclutterer

Erin at Unclutterer — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 01:52:58 +0000

@jeff parnes … All Unclutterer employees work from home, so no commuting for us

By: LC

LC — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 00:44:45 +0000

Oh, and don’t forget to tell your boss every time you think your day has been unfair. Monopolize lots of his/her time doing it, and make sure you whine when you do it.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 00:43:14 +0000

Stuff everything into file drawers. Piled up, not in order. Especially the confidential files that someone asked you to deal with right away, just stuff them in and forget about it. Put personal stuff and snacks on top of it just to keep the drawer “useful”.

By: Katie

Katie — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 23:27:54 +0000

Why limit yourself to cluttering people’s environments? Clutter their time with meetings. Bonus points if the break between morning and afternoon meetings is too short for people to actually get lunch.

By: nehmah

nehmah — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 22:16:48 +0000

Sorry, (am not!) to Jeff Parnes. No one in their right mind would take public transportation and walk more than two blocks unless fully-armed or escorted by bodyguards. I have worked in large cities for many years and you could not pay me to walk to work if I had to run the gauntlet to and from my job. Life is too short to run the risk. And do not tell me I am over-stating the case. I’m 5’4″ and need a cane to walk anywhere. Nehmah

By: Bex!

Bex! — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:40:50 +0000

I’m with you about the parking, Jeff!

I use a mix of methods (mass transit, bike, carpool) to get to work. When I drive in with my s.o. we always aprk in the same curb side spot, about 2-3 blocks form the door we enter the building by. It never occured to me to complain that the distance was too far to walk. Even on a rainy, blustry day like this morning! I have colleagues who rant about it, though. Ah, entitlement.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 17:54:18 +0000

To add to the ambiance:
constantly ringing, never answered, phones
a printer which squeaks
the constant squeal of a fax machine
elevators which lurch and shudder
scuttling roaches
bathroom stall doors which can’t be locked, and don’t stay shut unless held
keyboards and phones with sticking keys

By: delphine

delphine — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 17:12:09 +0000

Jeff – There are many places in the US, actually the majority of it I would say, where public transportation is nonexistent, inefficient or unpredictable. Driving is a reality for many people.

By: John of Indiana

John of Indiana — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 16:26:28 +0000

Make sure your office is underground or so far in the interior of your building that the only windows you ever see is the one sold by The Gates…
The last time I had a workplace with a window that looked outside was 1985.