Pick a store that you expect to want stuff later. For example, Sur La Table if you’re in the process of learning to cook. Or Target, or Barnes & Noble; whatever fits you.

Register for things you want. Now register for things you might want or things that others probably would want to get you (even if you don’t want them).

After the thank you notes and the wedding, return the items you don’t want. If the item was ordered through the gift registry, the store will (probably will?) include a gift receipt showing it was ordered thru the registry. Now you’ll have a stack of gift cards to a store you want to shop at.

This won’t work for people who don’t like social lies or who can’t stand regifting. To my mind, though, it sure beats having a dozen useless cluttery items from Tiffany’s because your registry was sold out and some of your guests didn’t know what else to get.

I second Bet on the immersion blender / hand blender. I use mine all the time for smoothies, soups and sauces. It is super easy to clean and store. I even gave away my regular blender on Freecycle!

The other kitchen item I adore is a sturdy grater. The IKEA Griller one is perfect because it has a rounded base and holds the grated food until you’re ready for it to come out.

I do keep a crepe pan. I bought it as a birthday present for myself a couple of years ago and I love it, even though I don’t use it frequently. It’s a fun treat for me and my daughter when we do bring it out. It’s not non-stick, though.

Generally I think food browns and caramelizes better when you don’t use non-stick pans. I don’t know if that’s scientific or anecdotal.

For flatware, we chose one of Oneida’s “Lifetime Patterns” and did the same thing. They supposedly never go out of production. Now when half the teaspoons mysteriously disappear, I only have to order a few more and voila! a full set of flatware remains.

Think hard before registering for both china and everyday dishes. Most people never use the china. Ask around to family and friends if they could loan their china if needed. Renting place settings is also an option.

Things I wish I HADN’T registered for:
Bundt pan
Any novelty baking pan (to much space, not enough use)
Food mill/Mouli
BIG granite mortar/pestle (WHAT was I thinking??)
Banquet sized tablecloth that needs ironing each time we use it.

Things I wish I HAD/glad I did register for:

3 sets of high quality sheets for each bed in the house (one for bed,one for cupboard, one for wash)

sheet cake pan (good for cookies and jelly rolls and flat cakes and novelty cakes…)

silicon baking mats

Good quality WHITE towels for bathroom (colors can’t be bleached and fade too fast- you can sew colorfast grosgrain ribbon on them if you’re dying for color…and then you can replace it when it gets faded)

Bar towels (These ROCK for cleaning and save me tonnes of $$ on paper towels)

Pilsner glasses. They are perfect for beer, iced tea and ice water. These get the most use at my house.

Crate and Barrel open stock white buffet wear. Look great with any flatwear/table linens and I use paper plates/cps a whole lot less

9×13 pan with cover- STILL haven’t gotten one!

8×8 brownie pan: ARRGH! WANT!

Kitchen Aide mixer and heaviest-grade blender I could get my mitts on: worth every inch of space. My husband adores the food processor, but to me, it’s just a lot of parts to wash instead of a knife or grater.

Heavy chrome pull-out shelf organizers so I don’t have to stand on my head to find a pan

Small cast-iron frying pan: I work in health, and there’s a lot of lab results about teflon that creep me out. We keep the iron pan on the stove top all the time, and use it so much that it never gets dusty. And hey- extra iron in our diet!

Set of nesting white quiche pans w/ lid. I cook/serve/store in them–great attractive multi-use

Stemmed Cake plate: Makes even my saddest baking effort look special!

A few cheap stacking trays from Ikea that will fit in my fridge: great for pre-arranging trays for parties and just whipping them out when the previous offering gets demolished.

I also would disagree with the “don’t upgrade what you have” theory – DO consider upgrading what you have, but only if you don’t LIKE the ones you have, and after researching carefully to find better versions. We had a crappy toaster oven that dried out our toast, so I checked Consumer Reports online and we ordered a better one; ditto with a blender – and we’ve used both of them a lot, and been much happier with the new ones. But, yeah, if something ain’t broke, don’t replace it.

My other piece of advice is to consider registering through Amazon (possibly as well as someplace else, especially if you do want china, flatware or linens, or other stuff you’ll want to see before choosing): they have a really broad selection, since they represent so many smaller vendors.

After 20 plus years of loving to cook with my husband, we are surprised at how little kitchen equipment we actually own. It has been well worth it to invest in fewer high quality pieces – we started with Calphalon but upgraded to All-Clad stainless when we decided to stop cooking with aluminum. We bought a small set of quality knives, a Cuisanart food processor and a Kitchen Aid mixer. We’ve owned them for years and still enjoy using them every day.

I also collected a set of fine China and silver flatware (and am probably giving away my age.) It’s okay – it’s not clutter for us – we enjoy using if often on even on everyday nights. We have even packed it up for a picnic (it’s fun to eat at a rest stop with a white tablecloth, china, silver, candles, etc. but make sure that you dress appropriately for the full effect!)

Specifically, about a year ago my husband and I realized that every time we tried to reach for the pancake flipper, it was dirty and in the sink/dishwasher. We bought two more of the exact same type. Now we always have one clean, ready to use and don’t have to stop mid-cooking to wash one. In our case, three of one item is a time-saver, not clutter. So, if there is one item in your current kitchen that you find you use multiple times a day, consider if 2 would be even better, or just clutter.

One the other hand, ditto foregoing knife “sets” for one knife you love. You’ll want to go to the store and hold several different styles in your hand. But when you find the right one, you just *know* – it feels like an extension of your own hand.

Congratulations!

As for what NOT to request, my best advice is: If you wouldn’t buy something for yourself (money permitting), don’t register for it. Our two “why did we ask for this and where will we store it?” gifts are dinner-party items where I fell prey to the magic of the wedding registry but never would have encountered such a desperate need that some other dish wouldn’t substitute in the unlikely event they were needed.

And on a related note, I *totally* agree with the people who say to assess your current lifestyle before making the registry. if you don’t entertain as a couple now, you’re unlikely to start just because you’re married. Ditto for major cooking/baking. When we first went to register, I had a magical picture in my head of convivial dinner parties with friends served off our newly-registered-for items. Until the first time my fiance asked “when would we use that?” and I said “when we throw a dinner party.” There was a pause while the idea of us hosting a party sunk in, and then we both laughed so hard we cried.

Don’t register for something you already have just because you want a new one. I registered for brand new pots and pans because I thought the ones I had–they were 30 year old red Club pans handed down from my mom–were ugly. But they were sturdy and thick, and the same pot could cook green beans or deep fry chicken. My shiny new pots aren’t that versatile. I miss my ugly old ones.

Allow yourself to be picky about what you choose, no matter how minuscule it is. For example, I didn’t put much thought into the spatulas and measuring cups I picked because they were only spatulas and measuring cups. I just picked the most popular brand, which happens to be clunky and rubbery. Now I hate them. I use them almost every day, but they’re in good shape and I can’t justify replacing them yet.

That said, there are a lot of unitaskers that are fun (ice cream maker, waffle iron, panini maker) which you can certainly live without. The dishes that are used all the time:

non-stick frying pan
saucepan
large stainless frying pan
stock pot/dutch oven

With that:

pancake flipper
measuring spoons
silicone spatula
measuring cups
good serrated blade
good chef’s/sentoku blade

Geoffrey