Comments on: Uncluttered doesn’t have to mean sterile

By: sm

sm — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 01:46:37 +0000

I really like this idea. I think if I knew that my host’s glassware was made up of souvenirs from prior clumsy guests I would feel less awkward were I to break something. And as a host, I am always somewhat hesitant to use the glasses I love and can’t replace because I know I would be bothered if someone broke one and I wouldn’t want my guest to feel bad. I don’t ever want to create a scenario in which my guests would feel ill-at-ease or embarrassed by that kind of thing.

But what surprises me is that no one else has asked to see a picture of Erin’s mismatched glasses! I am so curious what they look like on a table. Please post a pic if you have one, Erin!

By: Mary Kay

Mary Kay — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 05:16:46 +0000

I have mismatched plates, and they are all blue and white. When we go on vacation, I keep my eye out for blue and white sandwich plates because we use those the most, and they make inexpensive souvenirs. My favorite one is from a Thai restaurant in Manhattan. I loved the pattern and tried to buy one from them, but they gave it me instead.

And if they break, they break, and someday I will find a new blue and white plate.

Most of my stemware is from an annual holiday party planned by my girlfriends. Everyone spends $20 on stemware–could be one antique glass, or four matching from an import store–and we wrap them up. Guests draw numbers and have a choice of opening one of the wrapped gifts, or taking (“stealing”) the unwrapped gift from someone who had an earlier turn. A set of glasses can only be “stolen” twice. My collection is eclectic and reminds me of my friends. And, same deal, if one gets broken, I know I’ll get some more at the holidays. And we don’t get our wine glasses mixed up.

By: kris

kris — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 20:35:33 +0000

@.Candy . . . You asked whether there’s some kind of rule about whether you should have one or two lamps on a bureau.

I’m reminded of an article that I read in an interior design magazine years ago. The topic was how to decorate fireplace mantels.

Some designers insisted that all mantels should be decorated symmetrically. (For example, a candle stick on either side and a vase in the middle.) They suggested that symmetry provides a calming, balanced look.

Other designers insisted that all mantels should be decorated asymmetrically. (For example, two candle sticks on one side and a vase on the other side.) Those designers thought that mantels with objects arranged symmetrically are boring.

So I think that you can make the case for either one or two lamps on your bureau.

One lamp perhaps looks less cluttered and more interesting than two lamps would.

On the other hand, two lamps can provide a more balanced look. If you have a mirror above your bureau, two lamps also will provide more even lighting for brushing your hair or applying makeup.

For what it’s worth, in my guest room I have a simple antique cherry chest of drawers with three objects on top: a plain white ceramic pitcher made in France that’s filled with dried pussy willow branches, a white plate with blue edges, made in Italy, and a small while ceramic lamp that looks al though it came from Laura Ashley but that was purchased from Kmart many years ago. (I did upgrade the shade though.)

By: Candy

Candy — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 20:48:49 +0000

Hi, I hope someone out there can clarify something for me. I decluttered my bedroom, and cleaned off my bureau. I put a large size vase, with silk roses, a doll and 1 lamp with a silk lampshade with beads hanging from it, sort of tall, also perfume. My question that I have, is it alright to have only 1 lamp on one side of the bureau, and the vase on the other ?? This is a long bureau from the 70’s with a big mirror. I had bought the lamp which is pink, at the Salvation Army. I only bought one. Should I have bought the other to match on the other side ?? Is there some kind of rule about 1 or 2 lamps on a bureau ?? Thank you.

By: nicole

nicole — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 13:56:24 +0000

if i broke a glass at a friend’s house, i would offer to replace it, they would probably try their best to convince me not to and to not worry about it, so i would stop worrying, but i would still WANT to get them a new one…….IF i were to find out that the person was collecting DIFFERENT glasses!! FIRST, i would LOVE the idea, and THEN i would have so much fun picking something out!!! since i liked the friend enough to be at their party, i would probably want to take time to pick out a glass that i think they would really like….something unique, or maybe something that would remind them of me. OR something with a handle so that i wouldn’t drop it the next time;-)

i have mismatched plates, bowls, mugs (fiestaware-ish)……..and all my friends end up choosing a favorite coffee mug for some reason??! They ASK where “their mug” is, if it’s in the dishwasher:-) it reminds me of a friend each time i have a cup of coffee!!

By: Laurie

Laurie — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 23:37:56 +0000

When I was starting out a friend move in and we went glassware shopping at Goodwill. We both choose close to 10 glasses – wine, champagne, water, all sorts of shapes – each (we entertained a bit!) and paid about $.19 to $.29 each glass. Nobody stressed when we broke or chipped something. Oddly enough, when I moved out we took turns choosing the glasses, and I’m pretty sure we each ended up with the ones we originally choose at Goodwill.

I have also purchased sets of silverware from Value Village. I choose a theme – flowers – and tried to get a whole set when I could. That stuff held up to everthing. When I got married, it felt like such an indulgance to have matching silverware (though it’s two sets that I didn’t pay more than $30 total for).

PS: Where do I get those friends that courteously demand to replace broken items and magically send them a few days later?

By: Sanika Davenport

Sanika Davenport — Sat, 05 Jan 2008 05:50:43 +0000

What a marvelous website!

By: Michele

Michele — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 23:50:31 +0000

For glasses, I use mason jars. I keep about a dozen of the Classico brand pasta sauce jars (just short of a quart) for myself and other grownups. For my daughter, I keep four or five mason jars that some other kind of food originally came in — probably salsa, but I don’t recall offhand. I also keep two really small jars that held Classico pesto sauce: for martinis and other drinks that do best in very small doses!

The jars are dishwasher-safe and very durable. When any jar breaks, I can just grab another jar of Classico sauce when it’s on deep discount at the supermarket. Plus, I have absolutely no sentimental attachment to these “glasses” because they’re mere jars.

I really, really enjoy home canning as a hobby, and also as a money-saver when summer produce is cheap and abundant. So using mason jars as everyday glasses reminds me of one of my favorite activities. A final plus: they all match.

By: Raven

Raven — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 15:45:18 +0000

A few years ago, I was given a set of blue willow dishes, something I’ve always wanted. It wasn’t a particularly good quality set and I began to lose pieces to breakage. So, during my travels, I stop at antique shops and fleamarkets and buy inexpensive blue willow pieces to replace what was lost. I only buy what I’m missing so that I don’t wind up with an unmanageable collection. I no longer have perfectly matching place settings, but the common pattern unites the dishes, even with variances in colour and size, and I get to remember my travels with every meal!

By: Steve

Steve — Sun, 18 Nov 2007 09:53:38 +0000

My wife & I recently downsized our house now that the boys have moved out and we looked at all the mixmatches we had in glass ware. For the past 35 years we have kept a dinner set & other glassware for “special occasions” & just used the odds for everyday use, but moving into a smaller house made us look closely at what we had. Also as my wife said to me “If we don’t use them what’s the point of having them”. So the boys got a lot of stuff and we decided to use everything else from now on & if it fails the bounce test then who cares. I agree with a lot of the comments, the different glasses on a table make it more interesting.

By: talida

talida — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 18:08:43 +0000

Loved the entry and all the comments! This topic is definitely fresh on both my and my fiance’s minds, and you’ve given me plenty of ideas for our registry

By: Natasha

Natasha — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 16:02:15 +0000

I love the look of my clean white plates set up for dinner. But I do like visually interesting plates as well. Whenever I find myself at a thrift shop, antique store or even a garage sale, I always look at the dishes that are available. I’m a big fan of small “dessert” plates in interesting patterns and materials. I have a beautiful pair of china plates with cherry blossoms and a totally 70’s looking blue flowered plate. I love serving dessert or snacks on these, and I’m always on the lookout for more.

By: twosandalz

twosandalz — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 02:54:55 +0000

@ DebbieM, Laure and Serene – Now I understand why my mis-matched bedroom looks good! The pieces have some a subtle theme that ties them together. My eat-in kitchen (also mismatched) looks nice because I’ve repeated a color through out. I feel like I’ve discovered the key to a treasure chest. What a fantastic, inexpensive way to tie my hand-me-down hodge-podge of furnishings together!

I’m also mulling over all the suggestions you gave me for my floral sofa dilemma to figure out which will best fit my budget and other constraints. I’m actually excited about it, instead of dreading it! Decorating used to be so discouraging. I only got good results when I could buy all new (which has happened only once), or by accident (like the kitchen). Thanks for your ideas!

By: twosandalz

twosandalz — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 02:22:36 +0000

@Ro – I’ve done quite a lot of stove-top dying. It isn’t that messy if you’re careful, but I am not sure how washing machine dying differs. I found that mess wasn’t as big an issue as getting matching colors from each batch. The amount of dye per amount of and weight of fabric are very important.

By: lahope

lahope — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 20:28:12 +0000

Why stop at mismatched glassware? When I was a youngster back in the day furnishing my first homes, my friends (groupies and young musicians who worked at the Ash Grove and the Troubadour and lived in bungalows in Hollywood and the canyons) and I were thrift shop afficionados. We prided ourselves on finding beautiful, high quality items for next to nothing. We were always on the lookout for beautiful dinner plates, cups, saucers and the like. it didn’t matter if they matched. We found some beautiful pieces. I did inherit some 1920s silver from my grandmother (which I have subsequently given to my niece), but other than that, to this day NOTHING in my cabinets matches, not even a place setting. The effect is quite wonderful. Even though I own my home now (still in a canyon though) and can well afford matching sets of anything, I love my beautiful mismatched china!

By: Nancy

Nancy — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 13:31:55 +0000

My ex-hubby and I bought a set of black dishes when we moved in together 18 years ago…basically because ‘everything goes with black’. I still have the dishes, but rarely use them. I mostly use my mishmash collection of plates, bowls, glasses, wine glasses, coffee mugs, etc. which I started back in college. Macy’s Herald Square used to have a big ‘China clearance’ room. I picked up really pretty china pieces for about $1-2/each.

I also pick up small pieces during my travels, both domestic & international… Hilton Head, Scottsdale, China, Hong Kong, Morocco, Turkey, Hungary, Guatemala, etc. So, my dining experience is often a reminder of a wonderful trip across the world as well (& no, I don’t buy anything that has a destinations name printed on it). Ironically, I have a 1 gallon+ soup serving bowl w/ matching smaller soup bowls from Morocco, and 6 matching tea glasses from Turkey.

Keeping a mishmash collectionalso allows me to pick up some great bargains at the antique flea market here in NYC, church bazaar, or at antique shops anywhere.

As for my glassware, I have the mishmash in this area too, and hate it when someone gives me a set of matching glasses. I add them into my collection 1 at a time, as I break others (I could never ask a guest to replace a broken glass).

Oh, but did I mention that for Christmas, I have matching holiday ‘everything’ from place settings, to flat ware, to plates, to serving plates, and so on (not all in the same pattern though). Why do I feel the need for symmetry at Christmas & no other time?

By: PJK

PJK — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 05:53:24 +0000

@ anon – It sounds like you’re reading an awful lot into Erin’s comment. No where did she refer to her suggestion as a “family policy on when guests drop a cup”. As someone who would insist on replacing what I’d broken, I’d be happy to know that my host likes mismatched glasses and I don’t need to worry about finding a matching glass. I certainly wouldn’t feel “obligated to dig around for days for some perfectly bohemian-yet-functional glassware per your casually-dropped instructions.” I don’t know about the rest of the readers, but I gave Erin the benefit of the doubt and assumed that after the broken glass, first would come the normal “Oh, don’t worry about it, you don’t need to replace it” conversation. I would assume the suggestion to buy any inexpensive glass of their choosing would only come if the guest persisted. IMHO, at that point, suggesting any non-matching glass is a polite way to make sure the guest doesn’t go to great lengths to find a matching glass. In other words, “You really don’t have to buy another one, it’s no big deal. [insert guest's persistent comments]…Okay, well if you insist, just buy any inexpensive glass you like. Don’t worry about trying to match the set. We like mismatched glasses.”

Frankly, I think if Erin had known that her comment would be picked apart like this, she probably would have taken more care in how she worded that part of her post, but THAT WASN’T THE POINT OF HER POST. Most of us can infer what she meant, but she even spelled it out when she replied to Jane, “…I tell them it’s unnecessary, and they still insist on doing so. I’ll even explain that I like shopping for random, interesting glasses.” Is it really necessary to continue the nitpicking that has nothing to do with the post? Perhaps it’s not your intent, but it just comes across as awfully condescending. Even Miss Manners generally waits until she’s asked for her opinion on an issue of ettiquette before weighing in with her opinion.

By: Jeri Dansky

Jeri Dansky — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 05:26:40 +0000

I’m one of those people who would want to replace a glass if I broke it – and would have fun finding one for Erin.

I like the mismatched glasses idea. My current wine glasses are a beautiful set, bought for me piecemeal over the years by a dear friend – so I’m not about to make a change to mismatched right now.

But the dinner plates I use most often are indeed mismatched – ones I’ve picked up on trips to Spain, Italy, and France. Good memories with every bite! (And they are all patterned – maybe not the best to show off the food, but I don’t care.)

By: Sharon

Sharon — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 03:39:21 +0000

“My friends are not embarrassed when they break glasses at a party, they’re probably more embarrassed when they don’t break them.”

My gosh, what sort of parties do you have? (wink?)

By: Debbie M

Debbie M — Fri, 26 Oct 2007 20:46:53 +0000

anon, I assumed the idea about having guests buy a cheap replacement of their own choosing is only for the type of guests who insist on replacing something, even though of course it is our fault for handing them breakable stuff to use!

Ro, I actually have never dyed anything, although my sister has. She likes to use the washer. You could always save a load of similar-colored items to wash right after the dye job. My sister has also used a large pot of water on the stove, which she does not recommend, because then when you try to carry it over to the sink it is very, very heavy and hot and dangerous!