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Reader question: Procrastination ender
A reader (whose name we’ll omit to protect the inocent) asked us the following question:
I am married to an attorney and he is very disorganized and procrastinates with everything he does. What advice would you give him or how could I motivate him to act on practices like sending out bills to clients.
This is kind of a strange question to ask a bunch of organizers, but if you think about it, you won’t get any organizing done if you keep putting things off. Big projects, like organizing a home or a business, often go undone because people feel paralyzed by the enormity of the undertaking. As David Allen teaches, you can’t “do” a project, you can only complete steps along the way. Making a list of each physical step you have to take toward a goal is helpful because each individual step will be relatively easy, so you won’t put it off. Instead of thinking “damn, I have to send out the client bills,” you’ll think, “(step one) I need to go through my calendar and make a list of the clients I worked with this month.” “Send out bills” is an amorphous and oppressive task, while “go through calendar” is a five-minute no-brainer.
The only other tip I’d give is to seek professional help in the form of Neil Fiore’s “The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play.” Notice that I phrased the to-dos as “I have to X” and “I need to Y.” Fiore says that if you really feel this way, you’ll procrastinate because you’re doing things you don’t want to do, but instead have to do. He has some great suggestions for moving to a state of, “I want to send out the bills, what’s step one?”
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9 comments posted
Posted by Dr. Ragan, www.psychologyofclutter.com - 06/15/2007
This is fabulous advice. One thing I might add is, if you can afford to, pay others to do those things you don’t want to do. This is especially true for professionals who often enjoy their work but get bogged down by details. As this site noted in a previous post, personal assistants, who do virtually everything, are very valuable to the bottom line. For example, this attorney may actually get more billable work done and therefore make more money if someone else is in charge of the bills.
Posted by Jacki Hollywood Brown - 06/15/2007
I love being a mother. I love my children. I have also noticed that children are BIG procrastinators and they do not follow vague directions. “Clean up your room” is too vague for most children (under the age of well, umm…16???). They respond better to specific directions such as, “Put all the books on the bookshelf; small books on the top, large books on the bottom”.
From my experience, some procrastinators and some chronically disorganized individuals, have a great deal of difficulty breaking things down into steps. If they can hire someone (like a professional organizer or executive assistant) to help them establish the steps, then they are almost always capable of doing the job themselves with ease.
Posted by Rae - 06/15/2007
The reader’s husband might benefit from the flylady program. (It is at http://www.flylady.com.) Depending on the roots of his procrastination and disorganization. The flylady site is kitschy and aimed mostly at organizing the home, but it can be adapted to organizing worklife. It is based on establishing some very simple routines and spending limited amounts of time on the distasteful decluttering and tasks (”You can do anything for 15 minutes.”) This program has helped a lot of people. Again, if you can look past the kitsch and adapt to your situation.
Posted by Erin Ferree - 06/15/2007
It might help to schedule some time every once in a while to do these routine tasks. I hate billing for my small business, so I just schedule a bit of time every 2 weeks to get it done. It makes it a lot harder to procrastinate. And, after a couple of years worth of scheduling, I almost don’t have to put it on the calendar any more.
Posted by Neil Fiore - 06/16/2007
Dr. Neil Fiore actually says, “I have to” means “You don’t want to” and causes inner conflict–the dynamic that blocks your energy.
Choice is a third place that breaks the inner conflict that causes procrastination. “I choose to start at 8 AM for 15 to 30 minutes” is much more effective. Give your mind a body a clear image of When to start (from choice, not Have to or Want to). See Awaken Your Strongest Self (McGraw-Hill, 2006) and Now Habit audio at http://www.audible.com. Thanks, Neil Fiore, author of The Now Habit and Awaken Your Strongest Self
Posted by Katie - 06/16/2007
I have something of a different opinion. I work for some very disorganized people and one of my chief tasks is to get them organized. One of the first things I learned is that I can never force them to organize themselves. Rather, it is up to me to organize what I have and to gently get as much info from them as I can.
So, the gist of what I’m trying to say is that said commenter will likely never be able to “get” her husband organized unless he decides it is worth it on his own. Ultimately, she could de-clutter her own life by writing off his bad habits as “annoying but not my problem”.
Posted by The Mommy Blawger - 06/17/2007
I could have written that question. My husband had the exact same problem. He eventually quit the practice of law.
Posted by Eric Brodeur - 06/25/2007
I’ve read Neil’s book and David’s GTD - both hold the key. What I’ve found most important is building new, supportive, habits and being consistent. Without that, nothing seems to stick for very long.
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